Episode 323: My Own Worst Enemy

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[00:00:53] Good luck, you know, ready to go Dane? Yeah facts, Dane you ready? Alright. Who are we good? Um, three, two, you already know what this motherfucker should most ever love as always Donald Peasley. Along side LaShawn. You ain't gotta worry about self correcting nobody listening no more right? Yo, just starting everything. You can't be too sure, I don't know. Every Monday 8am. Facts, support us. Good times, bad times.

[00:01:23] Thanks for like, comment, subscribing. Different times. Ain't unsubscribing if that shit is about. Okay, everybody's wild. Already? Everybody's just wild bro. Damn nigga ain't no rosebud thorn just fucking bullshit just started. Just a bunch of thorns man. Oh I mean, Easter Sunday. He has risen. He has risen. Yeah. Um, he's the greatest. Amen. Um, I guess I'll start with Rose butthorn huh?

[00:01:53] As always, do your thing bro. Um, Rose of the week. I think me and Joe is gonna have the same one but um. Yeah. That's nasty. Cross contamination is kinda crazy. He's washed it all. Yo, yo, yo, yo. Yo. Yo. Nah, I hope they be a Joe. You know what? Yeah. I was gonna make a gummy joke. I'm gonna chill on that one. I'm gonna chill on that one. Um, Dan, I think Joe's making a sound for you to...

[00:02:23] It's alright, it's too late now. Um, Rose of the week. I'm gonna have it. I wanted you to switch cause Joe was showing how uh... The gummy's alright. The gummy. Um, freak. Um, I watched the movie Sinner with my lady this week man. That shit was... Everybody kept saying 10 out of 10. I gave it a 9.8. Wait, what? I wanted this shit to be 2 hours longer. That shit was so good. Oh, y'all ever see sure? I didn't want it to be done bro. That's a good rose. Like, yo. To the point where I was like treating shit like it was X-Men.

[00:02:53] Like the credits came on. I said I'm not leaving it bro. Yo. I'm not leaving it bro. Same shit bro. I was like something's gonna happen then. Something happened. Something happened. Um, if you didn't watch that go watch that. Um, that brother Ryan know what he doing man. Definitely inspired by him. That brother Ryan know what he doing boy. I was talking to Tori and I was like yo. I wanna shoot the pod and film. He was like no you do that. Yeah I ain't gonna crush a lot of fuck. That's a lot of work. Who editing that shit? I am. Why are you going... You gotta send that shit out to be edited bro. You're not gonna like that shit bro.

[00:03:21] He was like no you do that. You know how much shit I'm at? I take your word for it. Fucking oh man. You do IMAX? Yeah. Those um, RPX. I gotta go to another theater and um, there's another one in Brooklyn that I gotta go to. RPX is the one where it shower on you and shit like that based on the movie right? That's what it is? That's 40X. That's 40X. No, 40X. I want, I ain't go from. I like watching my mom. Wait, you leave the theater wet? Yeah. I don't front bro, I don't wanna be moist leaving. I mean... If you watch like uh...

[00:03:49] If I watch Jurassic Park it's gonna be like wind and... If you watch like the uh... What's that shit? The Marvel movies. I don't want that though. Fast and Furious, the chairs move. It's fire? Nah, it's a great experience. So I'm leaving it moist. I don't like throw to the hat bro. I don't like... Huh? No, it's a whole... Who said I didn't want that though? Yeah. I mean... I mean... Yeah.

[00:04:18] When it's a thing with... Yeah, you... It's like wind is like a... Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's... It's a great experience. Maybe I'll go there one day with a rose in. Nah, nigga. Fuck it. Um... Oh my God. Bud, what am I looking forward to? What am I looking forward to right now? Um... The next thing in my life, man, I don't... I feel like I could just live day by day at this point. Like it just... You know...

[00:04:48] Um... The next experience. Next thing I experienced. I don't really know. I ain't thinking about... I thought about a rose. Yeah, next good thing I experienced. Watch your words. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Next great thing that... The next... That shit can get spooky bro. Yeah, I ain't gonna front a real shit though. You're right. Um... The next great thing in my career, I would say. I like that. Um... Thorn... This week felt like a drag, bro. That was my thorn. Like... Work was kinda annoying this week.

[00:05:17] It was like it is what it is at that point. Like... I woke up at... On Tuesday we had a location shoot. So I had to wake up at like... 3.50. Yeah, Pete. Yeah, Pete. Yeah, Pete. Yeah, Pete. I was... I was deep in Jersey, bro. Yeah, yeah. I was deep in Jersey. So we did like a... I was like that's where they kill you at. Yeah, I did a... 6. Yeah, there definitely was though. That shit. It's a real racist shit. I was the only black person on site, so... That shit was real spooky out there when you was at. So it was a...

[00:05:46] I had to get to my job in Jersey at 6. Then we had to get to locations. It was like an hour and 45 minutes from my job. And we did a shoot for Guy Fieri. If you're not familiar with Guy Fieri, he's the white cook with the, like, Flavortown. Wow, he does all that other shit. He's been busy. Yeah, he's done. I just did a shoot with him, too. I don't know if I could disclose that. Yeah. So, yeah, we did some. We did some shirts. We did some shirts for him.

[00:06:16] We did, like, an apron. An apron? We did, like, an apron. It's like, says Flavortown. And has, like, a beer. Yeah, he's got, like, a drink coming out. Yeah, he has a tequila. He has three tequilas. A Nejo, a Reposado, and a Blanco. We shot with that, as well. Shout out to Sean again for disclosing that song. Yeah, so. That was. Yeah, I think you know everything about Guy Fieri. Yeah, me. That, and I did some shit for Disney Summer and Jaws. So. Thank you, man.

[00:06:44] I thought I was the only one. For Jaws? I did some shit for Jaws. For Jaws? Oh, boy. All right. Talk about clothes ahead, but all right. Well, yeah, that's my week. Yeah. It's synonymous with you, because my week dragged, too. I think last weekend, I kind of powered through a busy four days. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. We were just mad busy. When I got to Monday and Tuesday, and even Wednesday, I was like, yo. Drain. I couldn't do it, bro.

[00:07:15] Monday on, like, work, everybody kind of was, like, dragging. And Tuesday, I'm like, oh, I should have been better, but no. Wednesday, I barely got any sleep. Yeah, it wasn't the best week for my, like, energy. But I ain't die, so. You still alive, brother? That's cool, yeah. You still alive. Yeah. So that would be my thorn. Looking forward to this Knicks playoff run.

[00:07:45] Starts today as we record, so can't wait to go home and watch that. I really got faith in this team. I know a lot of niggas is doubting us for whatever reason, but, you know, we'll see. We'll see who's at the end. That reasons to doubt y'all. There's not a lot of reasons to doubt us. Y'all 0-10 against us. That's regular season. Like I said, regular season. I don't know why regular season's wins and losses matter to only certain teams. Proof of concept. You know what I'm saying?

[00:08:12] The Celtics might struggle with certain teams. The White Pills are not because of whatever. But it is what it is, man. We'll see. So, yeah, I'm looking forward to that. Hopefully we get a championship in New York. Because, you know, if this city win a chip, it's different. Niggas ain't going to never hit Coach Oshesmo, bro. Like, we've seen the Yankees win. Oh, you don't. Yeah, you a hater. I've seen the Yankees win. Yeah, but you a hater. It doesn't matter. I don't hate the Yankees. You a hater. We just played y'all in the World Series. So I'm going to root for my team.

[00:08:41] Anyway, I've seen the Yankees win. I've seen the Giants win. And most recently, we've seen the Liberty win. I feel like if the Knicks win, it's going to change the city's dynamic of, like, laws and rules. Shit, Eric Adams might get extended. Yeah, I ain't going to lie. So I'm really looking forward to that. So hopefully the Knicks can bring niggas a championship within the next five to seven years, bro. Damn, you just said. Because I ain't putting up with this in my 40s.

[00:09:13] I'm pretty sure you will as a Knicks fan. Yo, I'm not putting up with this shit in my 40s, man. And yeah, my roles is just, yeah. Sinners was amazing. Definitely something that I think I want to watch again. You know, what I do when I watch movies that I really like, I go immediately and start reading up on what it is. Because, you know, I block out all trailers, right? Like, I saw Quanee was watching it. I skipped his story just in case he posted about it.

[00:09:38] Like, just so when I watch a movie, it's all fresh in my brain. So you don't like spoilers. I don't like spoilers. I don't like previews. Like, during the previews of while watching a movie, it's like, I'll check the temperature to see if there's something that I would watch. And then I'll just block it out of my mind until it's over so that I can watch the movie fresh. Because there's some trick. Let me explain. He said he just take the gummy out of it. Waffle, waffle.

[00:10:08] He said my son just back out and stuff. You ain't even going to kiss me. Yeah. All right, let me explain. Let me explain. So, for me, in trailers and previews and stuff like that, I like enjoying experiences without any, like, surprises. I know how my brain operates. If I know what's coming, I can't enjoy it. Niggas laughed at me with Gerald Jones, so I had to laugh at him. I'm for Joe, you have to beat him when I laughed at, brother. That was crazy.

[00:10:39] I thought he was in a bad mood. He was over here giggling and ching. I got to make my people happy. But all I'm saying is, my brain will be so, like, focused on, like, oh, that's happening. Oh, you already know what's going on. Okay, please. So, what I do to combat that is, if I am interested in something, I will try to consume as little as it. And this is music. This is... You with concerts as well. Concerts, movies. I'm going to just... I'm missing. Ducking out.

[00:11:07] I had found, like, a few leaks that I was really looking for. And it took me a minute to find them. So, as soon as I found them, you know how you, like, try to send a message and ask, like, the list of people? Yeah. Before it expired, Joe was first. So, I just started saying that. That's what Joe, yeah. I know. I need them, like, in a sacred place. I got him. I got him for you. Because best believe when I went to go check, that page is gone. Yeah, I got him for you. He says, UMG has erased this page. Yeah, I got him for you. I got him for you. But, yeah, I just... Me and... I like consuming things in a very pure mind, you know.

[00:11:37] With no one's opinion or nothing, just straight. Yeah, that's the other part. Like, so even people saying, like, oh, this shit was a 10 out of 10. 10 out of 10. I got to see myself. I was like, fuck, why y'all doing that? Yeah, put your expectations on. Yeah, right? Because I try my best not to have any expectations with shit like that. Because, you know what I mean? Then I'm over here expecting it to be this way and it's this way. I hate that about certain shit. But it did live up to whatever the hype was. It was a really great film. So, shout out to Kugula. One thing about movies and shows, I don't list up people's opinions.

[00:12:07] Because a lot of people don't know what a fucking good TV is. Pawnee liked this. I was like, if Pawnee liked it, it's got to be good. I was like, it's going to be a good show. But even watching a video of him talking about how he created it, I said, nah. That's what took it there for me. I said, it's going to be fire, bro. I was more willing to watch that because I'm like, that's not anything of the film. He's telling you about the process. And he's giving gems that a lot of people in the film industry don't give for the free. That showed intentionality. And that's important to me. Another reason? Intentional.

[00:12:35] My fault to cut off your Rosebud throw in LA. Even him, not even cold switching. This nigga is some Cali nigga, bro. Oakland, nigga. And he put a little bit of it in there in the movie, though. You got a little, a few seconds of it. You going to see it? No, you going to see it, though. He don't fucking kill me. Okay. Y'all could tell me the whole movie from start to bottom. We still got other people that listen to the car. I'm going to watch it. Copy. I enjoy spoilers. Nah, that shit was hard.

[00:13:05] That shit was good, though. What was your week, I love? My Rose, I got to be domesticated all week. So I like that. I didn't fly this week. I needed a break. I'm actually about to start going crazy next month. So I gear up for that. So that was my Rose this week. I don't like that you're laughing or holding your mouth, though. Nah, I'll tell y'all after, bro. All right. Oh, my gosh. Look at Joe's a bad name.

[00:13:37] Bud, what do I look forward to? Shit. I don't know. I don't know yet. I feel like we just live. I do. But it's also my thorn, so I combined the two. My bud and my thorn. My thorn is the IRS. Again. Again. Being an entrepreneur. They said it was going to be fun. They said it was where the dreams come true.

[00:14:05] They said it's where you make the most money in life. They lied. Get a 9 to 5. Huh? Their game is rigged. I owe them a lot of money. So that's my thorn. My bud is I look forward to when I pay it off. Just when I think I'm about to make some good money and it's going to stay with me, and I go, you know, buy nice things.

[00:14:34] There's this watch I'm really eager to buy. Uncle Sam says, slow your roll, man. Can you give us details on this watch? Not at all. Not at all. You know why? Because there's no details to give. I gave up that dream. Oh, I just got to work extra harder. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Facts. Maybe some good money will come my way. I got some invoices to send out. Is it Dream Watch territory or? Nah, not that close. Not yet? Not that close. Not the grand scale. Nah, not up there. But it's the middle tier.

[00:15:04] It was the middle tier Dream Watch. But, you know, August still got some time from now, but I got to worry about paying the Uncle Sam. I got rent. All these other things in the way of that. But it'll come. What's for me will be for me. Like a good man once said earlier today. Wise young brother. Wise young brother. Better be careful. You never know what's for you. That's the dangerous thing about saying that quote. You don't know what's for you. Neither.

[00:15:34] You sure you ready for that? It circles back. No, but... I wish I could tell y'all what I was laughing. It can sometimes be a lesson, you know? You can say it. We love. Nah, I just hear some noise in the hallway. Please bleep that dog. Please, bro. That was sick. That's staying, bro. Really?

[00:16:06] That puzzle together. And I ain't do nothing. I'm snitching. Since we're on the topic... I just want to say this docket, Mr. LA. Uh, you updated the docket. I just be just living. Nah, when y'all update the docket, I do not stress anymore. Cause I'm like, oh... Somebody thought of something. It was nothing on your spirit, though?

[00:16:38] Nothing outside of the usual. What's the usual? I got this money. Facts. Gotta figure out how I'm gonna get this money. Um... Your own... Your own... I was just writing... You're your own enemy. Wait, you are your own enemy? Yeah. Kojo, you updated the... I didn't in. I just went in. There's nothing in there? It just updated that you wrote something... Me? Oh. I ain't do nothing.

[00:17:08] Oh. Alright. Um... You are your own enemy. Tell us more. Are you your own enemy, Dom? Um... The reason I thought about that is because I said I had a tough time at work. Um... Everybody was just like... Like, everybody had a little bit of an attitude. And I felt like, yo, shit was towards me. I'm like, yo, bro, am I... Am I thinking this shit in my head? Oh, like, is this shit real? Mm. Then I started, like, playing shit when I said nah. This was the day you went, uh...

[00:17:38] You went up Jersey early? Yeah. Nah, you just tired, bro. That's the thing about it is it was like, yo... But that shit... That shit carried over until, like, Wednesday, Thursday. I'm like, yo, bro. Did I do something wrong? Did you ask them if you did something wrong? Do I... My post is like, I gotta ask you like that? Absolutely. Yes. Instead of walking around feeling like... Bro, if I ask you, everybody good? Y'all good? That's not a question, bro. I gotta say, do I do something wrong? You gotta figure out... You gotta get to the root of the problem. You gotta work on your verbiage, bro.

[00:18:07] I gotta literally say, yo... If you feel like the tension is thick in the room, and you feel like it's directed towards you, you go to the top of the food chain of whoever the tension is thickest with, and you feel like, hey, you know, it kind of feels uneasy. Did I do anything wrong? Or is there anything I could do to make the mood a little bit better around here? And if you did something, oh, that's the perfect time that it'll be brought up. Okay. But the thing about it is that my head is... Nah, this is a fact.

[00:18:36] Like, bro, I get there early. I help with everything. I make sure everything is set up. I go do my work. I come back. Everybody else is good. Video? Let me help video. Then I go back to what I'm doing. What the fuck could I have done wrong? That's what my... Okay, with you doing that checklist, right? You would think that's reassuring to calm your nerves to feel like maybe I didn't do anything wrong, but you still feel like you did something wrong. So maybe there is something that you missed.

[00:19:05] Maybe he is his own enemy if he's forcing that narrative upon him. Yeah, because if I do a whole mental checklist, all right, I did this, I did this, and you still feel like, damn, like, there's smoke for me in here. You forcing yourself to forget that you did something that's causing that. And then you're trying to figure it out the whole time. Like, I had to do something. It's got to be me. What? That shit put me in a space where it's like, oh, I ain't going to front, man. I got so irritated. I was like, yo, bro, open my laptop. I'm going to fuck who behind me, man. I got LinkedIn. I'm like this, bro.

[00:19:34] That shit defends every time. I was irritated, bro. Man, what is that? What? What is that? Like, what is that? That shouldn't, that, do what you want, but that shouldn't be like, immediately. Bro, it's like, yo, bro, niggas, like, if you got to, if I keep preparing for the end, like, he is, no, he's prepared for the end. It's like, yo, bro. Nigga trying to speed that process up, actually. So, in what case, in what case, what would I do then? Instead of doing that, going on LinkedIn.

[00:20:05] Maybe you should figure, I mean, you should figure out if you really want, you really want to be there. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, because, yeah, that goes for a lot of things in life, bro. Because if you're thinking of your exit strategy now, instead of just trying to do the best that you can where you at now, like, there's this thing on, like, where your feet are planted,

[00:20:29] stay where your feet are planted, and build off of that, and you're thinking about your next pivot before you just excel where you at now, then you probably not supposed to be there. Or is it me, I'm trying to leave before I get left? Yeah. It's definitely that. You're too paranoid about getting clipped. Yo. And you're trying to leave, you're trying to find a job before you get clipped, even if you might not get, you might not.

[00:21:00] Because we've said early, well, you said early in the pod that, you know, they want to see you develop into a great person here at the company. Your manager said, yo, she see you in her role. So I can't see somebody saying that to you and then firing you unless you do a total 180. But he doesn't trust their word. Right. He doesn't. It's just the paranoia. Yeah. You could be paranoid as fuck, too.

[00:21:26] Or maybe, like, you putting yourself on your own, like, clock in a sense. You don't feel like where you are right now is where you should be and you're trying to, you know, trying to do whatever you can to expedite that process. That's funny, because for me, I know I'm fairly new at my position and I don't have it all figured out.

[00:21:52] But I'm not even, I feel like I have co-workers who operate in this space of, let me do everything that I absolutely can to make sure I don't get fired. And that, I feel like their sole purpose at work is to, not just to do the job, but to make sure they don't get fired. Because they know they're not in control of that and they're trying to do whatever they can do to make sure that they don't get fired. Which I understand. Nobody wants to be fucking jobless. I was jobless for fucking years and I hated it.

[00:22:20] But that activity of only working so that you don't get fired, then I don't even think people will understand how it reflects on them from other people who are watching, who are noticing that, and their co-workers, who it may affect. Right? Where you try, you start overstepping your lane because you're just so, you're trying to show everybody. Practice that move. Practice that shot. Right? Where? Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, you're trying to do everything, everybody's job so that everybody knows that you're the best worker here.

[00:22:50] It's like I said, at that point, you're trying to show value. Yeah, but your value is why you got the job. So focus on that. You know what I'm saying? Man, focus on that. Be the best at that. Yeah, your value is why you got the job. It may not be why you keep it. Yeah, you might not. Yeah, but yes, it will be because if you do your job well and you focus on your job and you figure out how to do your job, the value starts to grow. The value that you were hired, the person that you were when you were hired is not the

[00:23:17] person that you are when you are a month in, two months, three months in. And if you do a good enough job at your job, you become way better than the person that they sat and interviewed. That's how people move up at work. You know what I'm saying? Instead of maybe taking a short on the reason why they put you here to try to show niggas that you could do every and everything, and now you're falling short on what you actually got hired for.

[00:23:44] So, I mean, people really got to understand when you are at work, bro. I know for me personally, I'm sitting there focusing on how I can get better at the reason why niggas brought me here. And I'm not about to sit here and worry and panic about if somebody's going to fucking fire me. Because I can look at myself in the mirror every night and understand that. I know I got picked to be here for a reason. And it is a learning process, too. So.

[00:24:13] I think what my thing is, it's more of like the contract being extended kind of got my brain like, yo, what we still do? What am I still in this? Why haven't I gotten to the next level yet? Like, I've. I remember how I first started with lighting. I'm like, yo, bro, I ain't going to front. I didn't need any other day to help me with a lighting, right? To be honest. I think it's helped me a little bit. It was like, yo, actually making it worse. Let me do. You've shown. You're saying that you have. I've shown that I can.

[00:24:41] I've shown that in this extension, though. If you didn't get extended. So. With my job with shoots, it's kind of difficult for me to to learn. I learn on my own. Like, I learn when I'm at the crib. I'll just shoot some while YouTube something. I'll probably shoot once a month. Or twice a month if my first photographer doesn't want to shoot. So how much time is that for me to really practice? For real. Because most of what I'm doing, honestly, I'm helping.

[00:25:09] I'm setting up sets. So you see me post a Lilo and Stitch set. You see me post a Jaws set or something like that. What about the. Damn, this kind of goes into. Quanti's episode. So tune into that when that comes out. So I won't step on that topic. But what.

[00:25:38] Do you feel like at any part you skipping steps? What you mean? Like, you know, when you like. Like, like when you were a rookie. You got to do. Oh, not even a rookie. When you were the apprentice. Like at the electrical. When I was doing the in the union. You had like apprentices. You was an apprentice. You was a one year, two year, three year, four year, five year. Then you became. Big mind.

[00:26:07] Nah, not even that. Then you became. Damn, six years. You're not a big mind. Nah, you became a journeyman. Then you became like fully entrenched in it. So it was like. I do 10 years to get that. Maybe seven. Right. Damn. Damn. But you can't. You can't skip the steps of. Of. Of. Getting coffee for. You gotta. You gotta be. 150 people. Mm-hmm. And not fucking up on anybody's order. Cause you gonna. You gonna fuck up the whole mood. Is that humanly possible? I've done it.

[00:26:37] Successfully. 150? 150 people. You write it down though. Huh? You write it down in names. Not even that. Yo, it's not. It's more than just writing it down. It's when you give that order to somebody else. You gotta make sure they fulfilled it. Yeah. And then when you leave. You can't just trust that. Yo, I gave the. The bodega guy. All these orders. And they got every last one of them right. You gotta triple check. Go ahead. Cross your T's. Dot your I's. You gotta find these guys in a matter of time. Where the coffee don't get hot. You gotta be bold enough.

[00:27:07] To tell. You the new guy. And say. Yo. If you want your coffee hot. Meet me here at this time. Because I'm not going to the 7th floor. 8th floor. 9th floor. To find all y'all. Nigga. That takes balls. You gotta grow these balls. You know what I'm saying? When I first got there. Nigga. We go up and down. I was stretched. And then one day. My shop steward was like. Yo. You know you could tell them to meet you here. If they want their food. Right? Oh, I can? Alright.

[00:27:36] So the next morning. I go into work. Yo. Give y'all orders to LaShawn. Fuck I say it. I just didn't say it. Pussy. Yeah. And then one day. Somebody was like. Yo. My coffee mad cold. And I got frustrated. I was like. Yo. Well. You know. You could meet me. On the 5th floor. You know what Tom Coffee is. He's like. Alright. You right little nigga. And then I was like. The next morning. Uh uh.

[00:28:06] Before we brief. Yo. Coffee pickup will be on the 5th floor. At 10 o'clock. Nigga. Chest was out. How the fuck you carrying all of them coffees? I had a nice cart. You gotta figure it out. And I think that was a part of like. The grind of being a good electrician. You gotta be able to. Know your shit. Be confident in your shit. They not just gonna throw you. And tell you. Hot Wyatt is box. That's gonna. Light up this whole arena. Oh yeah. You gotta go through some weird steps.

[00:28:36] It's like the Mr. Miyagi training. Do you. Have you taken any of them skills? And like. You still have any of them skills right now? Yeah. I do it with. With this. In a sense. Where it's like. You know. You just don't get comfortable. In the routine of knowing. You triple check. You double check. Because you don't want to. Get so caught up in. Thinking you know the shit. That you not learn. Yeah. You're not on point. You're not on point. Um. So. So yeah. I think. In your journey. Of becoming.

[00:29:06] A top ranked photographer. At your job. Or any job. You never know. What you're learning now. Is the intangibles. That's going to help you carry. Into where you're supposed to be. Like you don't take the weird. I don't know what this is going to do. Phase for me. For granted. Because then when you get there. And it's like yo. They expect you to already notice. You know what I'm saying. So when I became. When I was in my fifth year. They expect me to know certain things.

[00:29:36] Or. Or. Because hey. You're at this ranking now. We're not going to give you the grace of. When you was a first year apprenticeship. Yeah. So you got to know how to talk to people. You got to know. It's just little intangible skills. That it don't make sense. While I'm going through this. But it'll make sense. Later on down the road. I get it. Because I have a. I have a senior position. At a company. So I. And I could also beat myself up. And be like. Damn. Why don't I know this shit. Why I haven't figured this shit out already. Nigga. I am a month in bro.

[00:30:06] A month in. And. So. I try not to beat myself up. About things that I don't know. And I just know. I have enough. Brain power to figure this shit out. So I'm not going to sit here. And think. Damn. These niggas about to fire me. If I don't figure this shit out. No. Y'all going to wait. Because I'm. I'm getting there. Don't worry. Like. I'm going to get there. So. I think I'm my own worst enemy. Well. No more. No more. No more. But. Being confident in my decision. My decision making. Like.

[00:30:36] I'll renege. A lot. Mentally. And emotionally. Because I'll be too. You know. You got to stay at ten toes. And you know. Or you double dutch with your decision making. And they'll be like. All right. My own worst enemy will be like. Nah. Because the result of this. Is a lonely road. You make this decision. And you do this. You let. You accept this. Or you don't accept this. So for example. Like.

[00:31:08] I think a couple weeks back. I told you about like. This opportunity that presented itself. Yeah. The real estate podcast. Yeah. The real estate podcast. Uh huh. Actually. After recording the pod. I was like. Yo. I don't think I'm okay with this number. That I. That I'm about to tell them I accept. Mm hmm. So. I. I. Chad. I said a counter email. No.

[00:31:37] I actually sent the email saying. Hey. I know this is your number. But this is a number. I'm more comfortable with. You said that with confidence? Yeah. Okay. Good. And they. And then it came back saying. Hey. You know. The. Uh. The firm decided to just can the whole idea. Okay. Right. Now. Part of me. Did have a moment of. Damn. Probably if I'd have just accepted it out. I got that quick. Whatever. Whatever that was. But. Then it's like. Nah. Be. Like. You ain't lose it. Yeah.

[00:32:07] Because. You know. Okay. It's just. It just. Dissolved itself. You know what I'm saying? Like. Don't think because of the decision you made. Altered. Like. I didn't beat myself up. Damn. That would have been a quick seven. Whatever. Whatever. I should have just been okay with what they were giving me. You shouldn't have actually. Nah. That's why you said something. Right. Exactly. So. Me being my own worst enemy. Back in the days. I would have accepted that. Knowing that I'm not okay with this.

[00:32:37] In fact. Another opportunity presented itself this week. And. They asked for one thing. But then they started. They started. Throwing things in there. That's. Not on the contract. Supposed to be asked for. So. They asked for. They asked for. For some edits. And then they asked for a thumbnail. I said. Hold on. Like. A part of me was. When I had the phone call.

[00:33:06] And he asked for it. I was like. Oh. That's. That's. That's nothing but a quick edit. But then I realized. That's in the wheelhouse of graphic designing. No. I didn't get booked for that. I'm not. I'm not that. And I'm not going to outsource for that. That comes out of your pocket. I'm not doing that. You know what I'm saying? So then. You know. Me being my own. Own worst enemy. Would have just accepted that. And figured it out. And tried to make it happen. Uh huh. But no. That's not what I'm here to do. So.

[00:33:36] Me being my own worst enemy. Was for me. Not speaking up for myself. In fear of things not going my way. Or losing out on the opportunity. I kept quiet on a lot of shit in my life. Right. Because I was just fearful of like. Oh. If I say this. I might lose this. I might lose that. That. Uh. They may not understand. Yeah. Now. Hey. Am I confident? Did I think this through before I said it?

[00:34:04] Do I understand why this is making me uneasy? I bet. All right. All right. Now we're going to speak on it. Whatever happens. Happens. You know. I'm no longer fearful of. The result of. No longer silencing myself. That was my like. My. Out. That was me being my own worst enemy for a while. Because. I let a lot of shit slide just keeping quiet. Bro. Keeping quiet. Or thinking I was easy to play with. Or something like that. In all aspects. Work.

[00:34:35] Entrepreneurship. Like. Or not acting. Like. I. I starved a lot. Because I never said I was hungry. So my. My own. Now I'm not going to lie. He right though. I'm not going to lie. Literally and figuratively. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like.

[00:35:05] Say nothing. You ain't saying anything. Yeah. Yeah. Facts. And people will play with you. You know what I mean? If you allowed them. Yeah. Facts. I don't like it like that. I don't like it like that. You're going to have to consent. You got a little foreplay. You can't just take the gum here like that. Bro. Kiss it. Yo. Yeah. So. See now. I ain't going to say something. But I got to figure out a way to say something to niggas though. That. That. That. That's a different. That is a part of no longer being your own worst enemy. You know.

[00:35:36] Finding your voice. How do you articulate yourself in these situations? Delivery. In these tough circumstances. You know. You say it out loud. Me. I'm a person bro. I talk to myself a lot. Because I got to. And I talk out loud too. Because I got to hear how this sounds. Like. Nah. Don't say it like that. That sound crazy? That sound crazy. Yeah. Because you know. You say it in your head. It's your. But when you start saying shit out loud. Like. Bro. So nah. I don't.

[00:36:05] I don't really practice on how I. That. I think that's. That's the next stage in any phase of manhood. Like. Learning how to articulate yourself. In a way where. You don't come off. Aggressive. That. Angry. Something. That. That. Uneducated. You just got to practice speaking. You got to. You got to find a way to say how you feel. Mm-hmm. Articulate it well. Uh.

[00:36:35] Depending on who you're saying it to. Mm-hmm. Getting it through to them. Understanding how they interpretate words and language and their emotions. Mm-hmm. And that. And that's how you get around. Because. At the end of the day. Everybody wants to be in a beneficial situation. Mm-hmm. What benefits you. What benefits me. What benefits us. And. Half the work is you finding a way how you articulate what you want. And if you can't do that bro. You're going to be stuck forever.

[00:37:06] Mm-hmm. And then there's. Then the only thing you can blame is you being your own worst enemy. Because that person can't. If they really want this to work too. Mm-hmm. Then they'll adapt. And then we come. It's the same thing. If we're going to keep it work. We're going to keep it work. Like. Mm-hmm. Like. Hey. You said you believe in me. For you to show that you believe in me. I need this. Mm-hmm. Can you do this? Mm-hmm. I need to challenge what you say. Yeah. You said you believe in me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey. Let me get one of these shoots. That maybe. Is not. That has more wiggle room.

[00:37:35] That's not like. A dramatic. Let me see. Let me show you who I am. Yeah. And then let's build off of that. Because how do you really know what I can do. If you don't allow me to do it. Right. And give me the same support as you. If I'm A. Treat me like A for this. Mm-hmm. Give me the same support that you would want me to have. Mm-hmm. Give me an A. I think that's another thing. That's a good point. That's another thing. I feel like I'm. I get support there. But it's not a lot of support there at the job.

[00:38:04] Like I don't want to blame all on the job. But like. I need more experience there. I remember when. I remember when I was at asylum. Right. And. I was. You know. I was just kind of like skating by. So I was just getting everything done that. I needed to get done. Mm-hmm. But then I realized. I'm like yo. I used to go up to Nicky Chulo office. Who was Atlantic's art director. Who you know. Did all the Cardi B stuff. All that stuff. I used to go in his office all the time. And just look at his wall. All his accomplishments. And just be. Just be. Excited about what the potential of.

[00:38:34] My abilities could be. Mm-hmm. I mean one day I came back. I came back. I came back down. I went home. And I decided to write. The whole team an email. Like yo. I know I've been doing all of this for y'all. And I'm okay with that. And I still vow to do these things. But this is really what I want to do. To take this position to the next level. This is what I want to be referred to as. This is what I want to do. This is the things I want to be a part of. And. And I think this should start at the top of the week. And I'm ready. You know. Anybody who want to talk.

[00:39:03] I just. Threw it. Threw that out there. Next week. I'm like. You know. Our PR team was like. Yo. We saw your email. Like. We got. Soda baby. Da da da da da da. And you know. Things started to roll out. So I think. Me just going out. And saying that. Obviously it didn't end the way I wanted it to. But like. At least I told niggas. Like. Like. If I keep doing this little. Minuscule shit all the time. I'm just staying here. Like nah. I want to. I want to go up. But you know what's crazy about that? I think.

[00:39:31] That is actually one of the hardest things to do. Right? Like. I wonder if I could find that email. That. Because you know. You. You. You. You. You do certain things in life. And you'd be like. Damn. What if I fuck up? Mm-hmm. But the. I think what's harder than that. Is yo. What if I'm really good at this? Because that demands a different level of discipline. That demands a level of brilliance. Because it's safer to just. Do what Joe said he could do. You know. I know y'all got me here.

[00:40:01] And I'm fine being here. That. I want to say it's mediocre. But it's like that. That middle field where you comfortable the most. When you challenge yourself to like. A bigger task. That demands like. Way more. You know what I'm saying? You just. You just have. You have to get up and do it. Because you demand this greatness from yourself. Mm-hmm. And you telling everybody to demand it from you. Mm-hmm. So now you increasing the responsibility. And you got to live up to it. I want. That's way harder than what if I fail? No.

[00:40:31] What if you really good at this shit? Mm-hmm. And this pushes you to new heights that's mad uncomfortable. Yeah. I went in there thinking. Yo. Oh. I'm just the graphic designer for the label. I'm like. Nah. Refer to me as head of creative services. Yeah. That's my position. That's a new challenge. Yo. Yes. I'm telling y'all to address me as kid. Right. Not. You know what I'm saying? I'm taking whoever crown. Yeah. Oh. There's a crown sitting here? Nah. I want that. Yeah. I want that. But. And to whoever's listening. Like. Make sure there's a space for that too. You can't just. Like.

[00:41:00] Grab somebody else's spot. Yeah. If there's no space for that. Like. I analyze. What's wrong with that though? Well then you're stepping on somebody else. Yeah. And that becomes the issue. Yeah. If you gotta. I mean. Yes. We from the streets. We from. But we. We from a competitive lifestyle. We're in a competitive. Right. But. I. I can't support just cutting somebody head off for no fucking reason. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Because you want. Because you. Because you want that spot. That's crazy. To me. As a basketball player. No. No. Okay. I want to say. That's competition.

[00:41:30] I don't give a fuck about. Who am I going to proponent. In sport. I don't. And in most things. I don't give a fuck about my opponent. I'm very competitive. But. In a corporate landscape. Corporate is a bit different to me. Because. I'm here doing my thing. And. If I. If I want. Another position. And somebody is occupying it. And doing well. What is the reason for me. Other than selfishness. To take that from me. What do you feel like. What if you feel like. You can do better than that. Go show it somewhere else. This nigga over here. Feeding his family. And I gotta go take it from him.

[00:41:59] Because of what. I. I can't bring myself to understand. Man what's the reason. In sport. I want the dub. I want the win. Because at the end of the sport. We gap up. We go our ways. Nobody's dead. You know. That's interesting. In sports though. Because. You can't affect somebody. Taking food out their mouth. Right. So say you. But we sign up for competition. That's why. You do sign up for competition. So when. You don't physically sign up for it. But. You step in between them lines. Y'all play.

[00:42:29] It's a competitive sport. If this nigga know. He can't go back to his hood. If he lose to me. He's taking the risk. By coming into the gym. And playing. Because. I also might have the same pressure on myself. So I'm dealing with that. But. That's what you sign up for. But you can also do that to a teammate as well. Say you. Say you. Say you're a bench player. Mm-hmm. And. Yeah. Okay. I see what you're about to go with this. You know what I'm saying? You finally get on the court. You finally get on the court. And you show why. You dropped 30. You now take the starting role.

[00:42:59] He. He's now coming off the bench. Mm-hmm. He's in a contract season. They now view him as a six man. He doesn't get the max anymore. You done took a hundred million. But I'm more inclined to believe that you went that route. Because. For survival. You didn't know if you. If this would be your next. Your opportunity ever again. Yeah. So you took advantage of that. I would be more inclined. You have a reasoning. I still can't find a reasoning. To see somebody who's doing something that I want. And it's not. I mean. It's affecting me. But not directly. Mm-hmm.

[00:43:29] And just figure out a way to just take it from me. To me that's kind of. You know what else I also saw. I was. My own worst enemy about. Always thinking I'm doing too much. I'm doing what I need to do. It's whether. The circumstances. Or the situation that I'm in. Can provide what I want. Mm-hmm. You know what I'm saying? So like there's certain things I would ask for. Or I require. And then when you feel like you're voicing it. Or you feel like your efforts is too much. No. It's right.

[00:43:59] You just not like. Getting. What you want. And you feel like when you ask it for it too much. You start to feel like. Nah. As long as your wants are reasonable. Mm-hmm. And within the guidelines of whatever situation you're in. You're not asking for too much. You know they'll say you're asking the wrong person. But that's better. I would rather believe that than feeling like I'm doing too much. No. I'm doing what I need to do. To prove. Whatever. Whatever. Versus.

[00:44:29] Once again. Staying silent on what my wants are. If I feel like it's too much. I. It may be too much for this situation. Mm-hmm. But it's not too. It's not too much for the grand scheme of what I feel like it's going to make my life better. Mm-hmm. If I want these nice things and whatever. Whatever. I got to do the work to get it. Mm-hmm. Right? But if I don't actually say it or manifest it or dream it. Mm-hmm. Then yo.

[00:44:55] I'm going to be living a mediocre baseline life at a level like level playing field. Nah. I want to make the best out of this thing called life. Mm-hmm. So I got to go after what I want or what I feel like is the best situation. I can't get in. I can't be in my own worst enemy to feel like, oh, I'm not ready for that or that's asking for too much. Is it? Somebody got it somewhere. Mm-hmm. Where they asking for too much? They living it. Sometimes I feel the opposite. Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing enough.

[00:45:27] Why? Like even with work. I'll keep it at work. Like I'll do all of this other stuff. Like nah, I got to do more. I got to. It goes back to me. I got to prove my value. Yo, I've been. I think this whole year. Mm-hmm. I feel like I've been in that limbo of proving my value. Mm-hmm. I want to say that I feel like sometimes people know your value. Mm-hmm. Maybe they can't match the value. Mm-hmm.

[00:45:57] So let's keep it work. Let's keep it work. Right? Who wants to say your job don't see your value? They just don't have the budget to pay you your value. Mm-hmm. Does that make your value any less? Nah, it doesn't. But I want that money, though. Exactly. That money, though. So that's where Joe would say, yo, you got to go elsewhere to find that. Right? That doesn't change the value. You know what I'm saying? But you know what's crazy, though? I'm, like I said earlier, I'm so. You can't let people put you on a firm, bro. And I'm so in my head. That's great. I like that.

[00:46:37] Damn. I want to say this the right way. Let me say this. You want to give me some time? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. So what I will say is I'm so in my head so much, the art director says it, and the first photographer will be like, yo, I ain't gonna fire. I really appreciate you. Like, you put in a lot of hard work. And now I'm still in half these thoughts. Yo, the next time you hear that, bro, I want your response to be something very boisterous. Like, yo, I want to say that shit, bro. I mean, I'm having that shit on my chest. What would it be? Like, like. Pay me, pay me what I'm working. That's, that's aggressive.

[00:47:07] I mean, like. It's my goal. Something, something else. If y'all, if y'all value me some, maybe full time, son. That's it. That's direct. I fuck with that. Or you can say it in a way where I. Cause like. Yeah, no, say that. It's been moments where the art director's like, I ain't gonna front. I don't think the set would be built if he wasn't here, son. I'm like, yo, bro, like. Tell a nigga, you know what you say? Don't lose me. I like that though. Don't lose me. I like that though. And say that in. Or.

[00:47:37] I appreciate it. Or like. Let them know. Yeah. Let the higher ups know. Tell them, yo, I want to take this even more higher level. Like, let them know that. I'm ready to. That. Yeah. Remind them that the value is dictated by you. And your effort. And like, if I leave. You're not feeling like that. Mm-hmm. Yeah. If I stay. Yeah. There's a chance. Mm-hmm. That you can feel like this. And even better. Yeah.

[00:48:07] But I need. I need a. You know what I mean? I need a little. You know what I mean? You still don't hear how to say this? No. I fuck. No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm a ditch that. Because I don't know how to articulate that without offending. So. I'm going to leave that alone. Um. But. The. Proving the value. Because I. Sometimes. I really think people know your value.

[00:48:37] I got a pro on the show and shit. They just. They just try to. They just run you? You know. Oh, no. What. What they. What. You know what I'm saying? If I'm getting a. If I'm getting a free show, why I'll stop it though? Exactly. That's why you got to stop participating. Got to stop being the circus and the clown. I mean the clown and the circus. Damn. That's. That's when the mindset comes up. That's when the mindset comes up. I'm doing too much. That's when I'm doing too much pops up. Because that's when I feel like now I'm performing. I'm the. I'm the clown in your circus trying to prove that you know.

[00:49:07] I'm here for it. Reason. I'm here for it. But nah. I. I. I. I. Know your value. I think people just try to like. Affirm it. It's easier for people to do. Do shits in. In bits and pieces. Versus then taking it whole. Which is why I don't let people affirm me. I'm talking about from the. Or the. The clown. Like that. That type of. Because it's still at the end of the day. At the end of the day. It's still. A thousand dollars. Mm.

[00:49:35] You probably only could afford to give me 250 every four weeks. I mean every two weeks. Mm-hmm. But my value at the end of it is still a thousand. Mm-hmm. Nah. I'd rather deal with people who got the a thousand up front. Mm-hmm. Than to try to break. Break it down. Because I don't feel like. I don't feel like. I get the full. The whole thing. You know what I'm saying? I understand what I'm saying. I don't. I don't like that bro. I don't like that. Like. I only got to get like. That's when you start feeling like people hot and cold. Because they don't got the whole. Mm-hmm. The whole stack to give you.

[00:50:05] Mm-hmm. You can't keep it a stack with me because you don't have a stack to give. You're about to have me at work acting different. See what I'm saying? So now you just 250 in me every two weeks. Mm-hmm. And yeah. It's still 250. It's a little something to feed me. There's something in your pocket. But it's not supposed to be. You owe me a stack. It's like Joe laughs so hard nigga when the bathroom. If you owe me a stack. Don't break me off when you can. I just. I don't like that bro. Because then you never feel like.

[00:50:35] You got the whole thing. You feel me? I understand. Like I. I just. You know what? Quanee that's a good wallet. I fuck with that wallet. Yeah. You know what could fit in that wallet? Yeah. It's a stack. Just keep it a stack with me bro. Like if you can't do it. Don't just. I don't know bro. That shit. That shit like. Because then I feel like you cheaping me out. Slim. I ain't on front. I can't lie to you. I was. I didn't want to talk about this in a pod. But I'm kind of glad I did.

[00:51:03] Because it kind of changed my mind on how to talk to them. I want. But I want action then. I know you on front. I'm going to talk to them. I'm not going to talk to them crazy. Because me and the art director. Yeah. It's always about. Me and the art director. Me and him always talking. Because I'm always helping them set up a new set. Me and him always. Niggas be in the fucking. In the studio playing fucking R&B. And just. And shooting the shit. So I could. Chop it up with something. Yeah. Yeah. Just like. Yo. Y'all got HR? Yeah. Niggas don't. Niggas don't. Niggas don't care about no HR. They be talking crazy in there bro. I think where you start with though. Is just.

[00:51:33] Expressing what you want. Let it be known to the job yo. I understand. I appreciate the reassurance of. You telling me. I see the value in me. I would like to see the follow up actions. Of you believing in me. I would like a little bit. Start me off with an extra responsibility. Build me up. Because I feel like. I play a pivotal role here. And I can make this better than where it is. I think y'all see the value in that. And I would just like more opportunities to show that. Any extra opportunities y'all could give me.

[00:52:03] Let me take it on head on. Let me see where I land. And then just build me up from there. Because where y'all got me now. I don't feel like. Y'all really. I hear what y'all saying. But y'all not doing what y'all saying. I don't need you to do my favorite. Write that down though. Later on. Just write that down. Essentially. You're laughing. I'm dead serious. Y'all can work on the dialogue together. Huh? Y'all can work on that dialogue together. I'm having my headphones in. Still talking to a nigga like LA. Tell me what you say. I really want to find that. Yeah. I've been taking a lot of risk. No longer being my own worst.

[00:52:32] I don't know when I came to that revelation. That I've been my own worst. Me being my own worst enemy. Is me not speaking up. I don't know when I lost my voice bro. I guess big as I am. I just be quiet sometimes. So I'm not supposed to be quiet bro. Yeah. Me too. Me too. But now I just say what I want. Like yo. This is. Yo. This is not making me happy bro. I got to get back to my. If I don't say nothing. Like what you going to do? Beat my ass. I got to get back to that vibe. Yeah. But that comes with a different aggression. And that's not what you're looking for. That's not the aggression. It's more like yo. What's the.

[00:53:01] Because why you got to think about beating your ass. No. It's more like what's the worst that can happen. Like that's the. You know what. Why are you saying that? What happened? I can't even shout him out. But. But you could. Nah. Why not? But one of my men. You a criminal? Alright. I know you're going with this one I guess. I used to ask him. Like yo. Like. How you so confident to like shoot like that? I found the email. Right? And the work. We shot it. What he said was. Nah.

[00:53:31] We going to let Joe see it on the pod. Y'all want to read it? It's kind of long. Nah. Go ahead. We got time. But. What he said was. Yo bro. The worst they can say is no. Like. I ain't. You not interested. Okay. But. What if that. Badass joint is interested. And I was just too scared to say anything. What if that. She was over here watching me. I was in pain. Niggas nervous. I was like. Deadass is like the example of a dead clock. Twice.

[00:54:00] But when he right. When he right. Right. He be right bro. So he was like. Yo. The worst they can say is. Nah. I'm not interested. Or. I'm. And then when I realized that concept. Like yo. The worst somebody can say is no. At least. But at least you. You. You didn't go about life. You put yourself. You put yourself out there. Facts. You got that email. I do. I'm. Reading it back. I'm very proud of. Of me. Because. This was me.

[00:54:29] Breaking out of the fear of. You know. Damn. You know what I'm saying. Essentially. I think this is what got me clipped. For real. Not in an evil way. But it's more so like. This is what Joe trying to do. And we can't pay. Because I wanted to renew my contract. It was. So. They didn't want to pay me that much. But I'll read it. Skip the. I'm writing this email. Because I've been doing a lot of thinking. As it pertains to my position. And my role here at Asylum. And. How I can grow and elevate the position truthfully.

[00:54:58] And have more fun with it. Being responsible for the creative services. Of the artists on our roster. Has been a. Sometimes challenging task. Because I'm not utilizing my strengths as often. And there's a lack of communication across the board. I want to put an end to that. This way. This is my way of expressing that. I want to step up to the plate. And be more involved in the processes that I love. And that I specialize in. Which is art direction. And creative direction. I want more of a say in our artists' covers.

[00:55:28] Billboards. Rollouts. And et cetera. I want more. This is. I want more time to ideate. And do more of what makes sense for our artists. I want to have more conversations with the artists. And their teams. To see what works best. I want to employ my creative circle. To utilize their talents. And help elevate our artists. And our brand as a whole. I said. Making assets for Instagram is cool. And I will continue to spearhead that. But I don't want to be boxed in. I want a hand and say in the creative processes.

[00:55:58] As I said before. I say all that to say. This doesn't happen. This doesn't happen. Have to happen immediately. But I would like to get the momentum going in that direction. Thank you for reading this long email. And have a blessed day. Let me say. Let me tell you something. I got it. My bad with that. That was 2021. Four years. Five years later. You're a senior art director doing the same thing that you asked to do. Yeah. Took a little while. You weren't asking for too much. Yeah. You were just asking the wrong people. You were asking the wrong people. Was it worth it? And what you said to Joe. I mean.

[00:56:27] I thought that shit in my spirit though. I thought that shit in my spirit though. He said. Full circle moment is when I was saying. Yo. Sometimes you. You in this weird space of like. Yo. What the fuck is happening? But you know what you want. You know this is going to lead to something. You just don't know where. But you confident in it. Joe went through. Getting clipped there. Figured out. His next job. Applying. Hustling. And it just. What he asked for. Five years. In 2021. Four years ago.

[00:56:57] Four years ago. Is now where he is now bro. So. What you want. Is what you want. For a reason. It was in him for four years. I said that to the whole label bro. The top dog. Down to. I guess me. Everybody got it bro. It just. It just. Yo. Joe wasn't his own worst enemy. In that moment. It just took it. Four years to manifest. And that's the same thing. That I feel like you're going through bro.

[00:57:26] I screenshot that shit for a reason too. I know. There's no. Because I couldn't find it in my actual email. It's in my pictures. Yeah. I just wrote. I typed the name. And it popped up. I'm like. I know I saved that. Because in my head I said. I knew that was a turning point of my life. Right there. Like for real. And now you can look back at it. And that. That was an old screenshot. So. And look at all the responsibilities. You. You. You. Now sitting down with. The CFO of. The CWing Stop. Telling them the role you want to play in. The company. And billboards.

[00:57:56] And advertisements. Yeah. It's not everything you asked for. So. I screenshot that on my birthday of that year. And I got fired. Because. That's when I. I kind of put. I put a video out. And announced it to everybody that. You know. And I thought that. Yeah. This was probably one of the reasons. Because once they knew that I wanted to step up. And that would have come with. More pay. They was like. Nah. Yeah. Skedaddle. So. Yo. Listen. Just find a way to ask for what you asking for. You not asking the wrong thing. You just asking the wrong person. Bro. Sheesh. That's a nice full circle moment. That shit felt good to read.

[00:58:26] There you go. Proud of you bro. I ain't gonna front of the team. And have the guts to say that to everybody though. Everybody got that email bro. Everybody. I'll never forget. Nigga said I. You know. Kiana was proud of me. She. Yeah. You know. She was like my biggest cheerleader. Yes. Kojo. Yeah man. You just gotta ask. Like yo. This is where I want to be. Yeah. I would love. The hour to show me.

[00:58:55] Y'all tell me all the time. Y'all believe in me. Y'all thank me for my efforts. I want more. But honestly. I'm a very patient person. But my patience is running very thin now. And it's because. Within. Deep down inside. Your patience is running thin with yourself too. Dragging. Dragging. Delaying it. Staying in that middle ground. Where you know that. You got a potential that. You want to live up to. I think that's what pushes me too. So. It's like yo bro. You playing with your own potential bro. Like.

[00:59:24] You told me once. It was like. Masturbation. And something. Oh fuck. Fucking yourself. Um. What was this nigga doing? Procrastination. Procrastination is like masturbation. All you're doing is fucking yourself. And. You told me that once. And I was like. Alright. Well. Let's get to it. Like. I can't delay it. You know what I'm saying? So. I think you just need to find your voice. Once you find your voice. Be mindful of what you're saying. Speak from the heart.

[00:59:54] Speak clearly. Speak proudly. You'll get what you. What you asking for. And. You got to realize that it may not necessarily be with your job. But what you want is still what you want. And. You know. Your life fulfillment. When you. When you realize. Back. When you look back in life. And be like yo. I'm glad I asked for what I wanted. This is crazy. That shit is. That shit was so heavy on. That. That shit was so heavy on me. Because. Bro. I'm stopping during workouts. And I'm just sitting there thinking like this. I'm on the fucking workouts. Like this bro.

[01:00:24] Thinking. I'm like damn. This shit is too much bro. That shit pressing on your mind bro. That's how you know it's like. What you want is like. You birthing it. Mm-hmm. It's. Starting to kick in your stomach. I'm thinking about it all the time. Like yo. You got to give birth to your dreams bro. That shit is inside you going nuts right now. Push. Hey yo. Yo. All right. I'm on. Thank you. You left me and Joe today. Let's get out of here. Great episode fellas.

[01:00:55] Great episode fellas. You already know who this Don the Camera guy Don Peasley. Stay focused LA on Instagram and Twitter. Don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe to our Patreon. Obviously. Obviously. First and foremost. If you want ad free episodes. You know what I'm saying. Tune into that Patreon. You know. You can watch us live. And don't give up on us. You know what I'm saying. Facts. Don't unsubscribe. Because you know. Whatever reason you choose to do that. You know. Okay. Because we still kicking that hot shit. You know.

[01:01:25] Oh. I had a joke for that one as well. That was easy. Oh. Oh yeah. You know. What'sagoodguy.com. You know. You got that website. Where you get the audio. And the video right there for you. And yeah. You can follow Joe. Joe got the. You know. Joe happy as always. Joe got cider. Joe got cider. You know what I'm saying. Man. You can follow Dane. At DBC underscore underscore underscore.

[01:01:55] He's on the audio. And the switcher. Shit me. Waving in it. Of course. Our photos are done so. Ever. So nicely. By. You know. The man. The myth. The legend. DSW 103. Shit me. The big alpha in the building. Big alpha in the building. And. And if you want to really hear his deepest thoughts. You got to subscribe to that Patreon. Because. We into his world. You know. We got like. Episode. Four. No. No.

[01:02:24] Episode four is out now. That was a gem. Episode five is crazy. I can't wait for that. That come out this week. So. Subscribe to that. Yeah. Episode six. Are you talking about this week? Yeah. Episode five dropped this week. I can't wait for that. We was cooking up. Oh my God. It's funny. Because we started talking. We started that conversation about driving. Yeah. That went fucking left. Oh my God. That nobody's going to save you segment. Crazy. So you got to. You got to tune in for that. And then we record episode six today.

[01:02:54] But see. If you don't want to wait. So these episodes drop. And you want to hear it live. Subscribe to that Patreon. Subscribe. You get to sit in the living room with us. Chat. Virtually. You know. You got some apple juice. You got some apple juice. Don't spill it on the camera. You. All right. Yeah. Joe's wrong. I'm going to lie. I'm going to lie. I'm going to lie. I'm going to lie. All right. All right. Wait, I'm going to lie. I want to make a joke. All right. All right. All right. All right. Subscribe to the 15 tier.

[01:03:23] Because we don't cut the mic so. We give it up. Crazy. All right. All right. As always. God is the greatest. And Jesus has risen. Your. Amen.