Episode 282: I Am The Prize

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_02]: My name is

[00:00:07] [SPEAKER_06]: Yep, have a seat

[00:00:09] [SPEAKER_06]: Sit right next to me and then you're probably there cold. Oh

[00:00:13] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, every 30 minutes

[00:00:16] [SPEAKER_04]: I'll let you know

[00:00:17] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm watching the time yet. So

[00:00:19] [SPEAKER_04]: Look at you. Yeah, I'm looking at the time

[00:00:27] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_04]: You know if I had a nurse in my life

[00:00:59] [SPEAKER_06]: We should know put that fucking video on it

[00:01:05] [SPEAKER_04]: Either should just left it alone. I did leave it alone

[00:01:10] [SPEAKER_04]: When we was talking she was like, uh, what'd you say? She said I hope I'm not talking it off

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, so so my phone when I get close to the crib

[00:01:27] [SPEAKER_04]: my phone

[00:01:29] [SPEAKER_04]: Automatically goes on personal like the do not disturb it automatically goes to personal because it says

[00:01:37] [SPEAKER_04]: Right. So Kojo had called me and I missed it

[00:01:41] [SPEAKER_04]: So technically it was a phone call first, but because I didn't pick up

[00:01:46] [SPEAKER_04]: Then they recorded the video

[00:01:48] [SPEAKER_04]: But when I realized

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_04]: That I missed the call from Joe I'm like, I just left Joe so I thought it was in trouble

[00:01:55] [SPEAKER_04]: I was gonna spin back and

[00:02:00] [SPEAKER_04]: He was like nah, um, so my more sweet to you

[00:02:09] [SPEAKER_04]: But I can't front that night I can't front

[00:02:13] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah, not that was with the shit. I was looking really handsome. I smell good

[00:02:17] [SPEAKER_04]: I

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_04]: Might take a good picture of me in a while

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_04]: So you know, there's no proof of that night, but just know I really was I smelled really good. You would have it again

[00:02:30] [SPEAKER_02]: That's true. It would have fit again. Yeah, you can wait to fit again

[00:02:36] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, I used to not wear free. Uh, I know I I used to not wear my fits over

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_04]: In this economy this economy I wait up for five six

[00:02:53] [SPEAKER_04]: Donald Peasley alongside of the shore

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_06]: No, no

[00:03:10] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh

[00:04:00] [SPEAKER_04]: My man

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_04]: Got one. Uh, no. Yeah, I got one the

[00:04:05] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, they locked in shots to my guys, uh, but yeah man coach was here

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_04]: Jeez in the building, of course

[00:04:25] [SPEAKER_04]: So let's get straight into it right I was talking to a good friend of mine

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_04]: I was talking to breed all the day and

[00:04:33] [SPEAKER_04]: Bri don't know this is about to be episodes

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_04]: Bri was

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_04]: Discussing her

[00:04:44] [SPEAKER_04]: past relationships to me and

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_04]: in the midst of us talking

[00:04:51] [SPEAKER_04]: She revealed a theory of hers that she thinks now

[00:04:56] [SPEAKER_04]: She's not the first to say this theory, but she's the first person to say it to me and we could engage in a conversation

[00:05:04] [SPEAKER_04]: Bri feels like for a relationship to successfully work

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_04]: The man must like the woman more than the woman likes the man. I've heard that I've heard that before

[00:05:22] [SPEAKER_03]: I

[00:05:23] [SPEAKER_03]: Know I'm not bugging out

[00:05:28] [SPEAKER_04]: Now it doesn't now it doesn't mean that the woman doesn't like the man at all

[00:05:34] [SPEAKER_04]: But he is more driven in

[00:05:40] [SPEAKER_04]: Leading the relationship

[00:05:42] [SPEAKER_04]: When he is more

[00:05:45] [SPEAKER_06]: Into it than the woman. I've heard a male say this

[00:06:01] [SPEAKER_04]: I don't know where I stand with that, but that's not what inspired this episode, right?

[00:06:06] [SPEAKER_04]: Well, yes, that's the subtopic

[00:06:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, but the real episode that I was thinking of you know how we've also heard women say

[00:06:18] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm the prize

[00:06:28] [SPEAKER_04]: I

[00:06:29] [SPEAKER_04]: In my exploring of love, right

[00:06:34] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm not going to say women are the prize

[00:06:40] [SPEAKER_04]: but vote woman I

[00:06:44] [SPEAKER_04]: May actually be on the side of thinking

[00:06:49] [SPEAKER_04]: My person is the prize. Yeah. Yeah, I know me the Shawn is mr. Literal

[00:06:55] [SPEAKER_04]: So when I looked up the definition of a prize, I read it to you. What does it say?

[00:07:02] [SPEAKER_04]: Words mean things words mean things

[00:07:05] [SPEAKER_04]: prize

[00:07:09] [SPEAKER_04]: anything given as a reward to the winner of a competition or in recognition of an outstanding achievement if

[00:07:18] [SPEAKER_04]: I find the person that I am supposed to be with for the rest of my life. I

[00:07:24] [SPEAKER_04]: do feel

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_04]: that I was

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_03]: awarded a prize

[00:07:30] [SPEAKER_04]: Awarded now see here's the thing, right? I don't want to materialize

[00:07:36] [SPEAKER_04]: The person as like a trophy or a thing. Yes, correct. Thank you for saving me. Thank you for saving me

[00:07:45] [SPEAKER_04]: That's not what I mean but in the midst of my search

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_04]: For the person that I'm gonna end up with for the rest of my life. I

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_04]: Can see how like you strive for something for so long and you finally get it and you do feel like you've achieved your goal

[00:08:03] [SPEAKER_04]: I wanted to

[00:08:05] [SPEAKER_04]: But see here's the thing about a trophy it represents that you only won once

[00:08:10] [SPEAKER_04]: So I don't want a trophy wife. I

[00:08:13] [SPEAKER_06]: want

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_06]: My prize what if that's a that's the biggest accomplishment in that in that realm of a relationship?

[00:08:20] [SPEAKER_04]: My wife yeah, yes, but at the same time, you know

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_04]: That ring means something, you know

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_04]: I actually you know, you hear people say yo, I would trade this and that just for one ring

[00:08:34] [SPEAKER_04]: because that's the ultimate goal as

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_04]: As a true competitor so as a true lover that ring do mean something to me

[00:08:44] [SPEAKER_04]: So I think I'm on the side of not all women are the prize cuz in the great words of YP after God

[00:08:52] [SPEAKER_04]: fear women

[00:08:55] [SPEAKER_04]: But

[00:08:57] [SPEAKER_04]: the the person that I feel like, you know, I

[00:09:01] [SPEAKER_04]: feel like because I feel like a

[00:09:03] [SPEAKER_04]: The good a good partner is gonna make you feel like you want in life like you look at that person

[00:09:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh, not even look at them. Like you feel it like even when you not around it like you just

[00:09:15] [SPEAKER_04]: Know you got a little but yeah, not the other Bob, you know, what's up about?

[00:09:31] [SPEAKER_04]: You know, you you know, you got that pop that pep in your step like you're I could go out there run mountains

[00:09:37] [SPEAKER_04]: You know, so I do think ah

[00:09:39] [SPEAKER_04]: but

[00:09:41] [SPEAKER_04]: to get back to breeze point

[00:09:45] [SPEAKER_04]: I

[00:09:46] [SPEAKER_04]: Think with me I can see that

[00:09:50] [SPEAKER_04]: But I don't want to grade my level I don't want it to ever be a

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_04]: Because for me, I don't think I would want to do more work

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_04]: Knowing that they don't like me the way I like that. My sister. How do you gauge? Oh

[00:10:08] [SPEAKER_03]: Weird what and how do we gauge that in what relation what world can we quantify in a relationship who likes who more?

[00:10:17] [SPEAKER_03]: Is there a bucket of but you like justify?

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_04]: I feel like you can

[00:10:34] [SPEAKER_04]: Words mean things I've been in

[00:10:38] [SPEAKER_04]: Breakups or move on and you'd be like and you think about everything that occurred even like damn that hated me

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_04]: So the same way you could think of the negative

[00:10:49] [SPEAKER_04]: Like yo when you look at the actions you were so blinded by in it

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_04]: But if somebody else was telling you what was going on be like, oh that person hates you

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_04]: I feel like that you could do that same

[00:11:02] [SPEAKER_04]: Thought process and think yo this person really likes

[00:11:05] [SPEAKER_04]: I don't know

[00:11:13] [SPEAKER_04]: In a past situation and you think about like all the things I've been through and be like damn that person really didn't like in

[00:11:21] [SPEAKER_06]: The past situation. We really had to basically your bro. I'm not

[00:11:25] [SPEAKER_06]: You can't prove it

[00:11:29] [SPEAKER_06]: You go to protect who does what you can't

[00:11:31] [SPEAKER_06]: I'd rather do that

[00:11:33] [SPEAKER_03]: Wait, but look let's be real

[00:11:36] [SPEAKER_03]: So let's be real you got people who you got people who I heard that

[00:11:41] [SPEAKER_03]: You got people who uh, you know who base shit like that or that statement on the things that they do

[00:11:48] [SPEAKER_03]: yet

[00:11:48] [SPEAKER_03]: The feeling is an actual feeling the emotion of love or like is a feeling

[00:11:54] [SPEAKER_03]: The things that you do result from that feeling but everybody

[00:11:58] [SPEAKER_03]: Probably's actions are different and how they show love. So if I do something that is not as

[00:12:05] [SPEAKER_03]: grand, but to me that still is

[00:12:08] [SPEAKER_03]: How I show somebody that I love him and I do that all this all the time. Mm-hmm

[00:12:13] [SPEAKER_03]: How is that to compare to somebody who does grand shit?

[00:12:16] [SPEAKER_03]: You know from the outside looking in and blow. Yeah, they like you more cuz they went boom boom boom

[00:12:21] [SPEAKER_03]: You might be doing something real simple but consistent you have a date at a drug dealer women don't do drugs

[00:12:30] [SPEAKER_03]: I

[00:12:31] [SPEAKER_03]: Never met a woman do drugs like actual drugs

[00:12:40] [SPEAKER_03]: What is the drug dealer have to do

[00:12:43] [SPEAKER_04]: The grand things I could be a regular nine-to-five. All right, right so my grand

[00:12:50] [SPEAKER_04]: My my two weeks check. Okay, read a little bit son

[00:12:58] [SPEAKER_06]: So now we're comparing I'm not trying to walk you out of that but we're comparing the

[00:13:03] [SPEAKER_04]: We just talked about Kojo's point to grant. Okay, okay

[00:13:12] [SPEAKER_03]: I think there should be a standard of how relationships quantify. I

[00:13:18] [SPEAKER_03]: You know, you hate now. We're right now, but how you quantify?

[00:13:21] [SPEAKER_03]: love right like but you can't the two people in a relationship should not be battling or

[00:13:27] [SPEAKER_03]: comparing

[00:13:29] [SPEAKER_03]: Who who likes who more that should not even be a thought?

[00:13:32] [SPEAKER_03]: I'll just like and love each other

[00:13:35] [SPEAKER_03]: More less if yeah, if somebody likes somebody more than somebody in a relationship, they shouldn't be together. Whoa

[00:13:44] [SPEAKER_03]: Yes, why would you want to be with somebody who

[00:13:48] [SPEAKER_06]: Likes you less than what if one person is obsessed the other person with other persons? I just love you

[00:13:53] [SPEAKER_06]: Being around you that is infatuated with the what

[00:13:58] [SPEAKER_06]: What do you mean obsessed bro? Thank you. This is the baddest show you ever had. Okay, that's great

[00:14:03] [SPEAKER_06]: And then you're obsessed with us like oh

[00:14:06] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, yo, you know what's crazy. Oh

[00:14:09] [SPEAKER_04]: She'll listen to this

[00:14:11] [SPEAKER_04]: Money

[00:14:14] [SPEAKER_04]: money X

[00:14:15] [SPEAKER_04]: was

[00:14:17] [SPEAKER_04]: infatuated that the fact that he had like like he he

[00:14:21] [SPEAKER_04]: His

[00:14:36] [SPEAKER_04]: Her ex was just infatuated like he

[00:14:41] [SPEAKER_03]: He he well, he loved how she looked he could he kept saying I can't believe

[00:14:51] [SPEAKER_03]: She looked yeah, yeah

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_03]: Does that mean that he likes you more than you liked him because he thought she was the most gorgeous woman or no

[00:15:04] [SPEAKER_04]: but what so

[00:15:08] [SPEAKER_04]: Her focus

[00:15:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Was all like, you know pouring into his focus was he was while she was focused on that

[00:15:45] [SPEAKER_03]: He was

[00:15:46] [SPEAKER_03]: I want to get back to what this situation right because I

[00:15:52] [SPEAKER_03]: Think infatuation and looks eventually wear off. Okay, right?

[00:15:56] [SPEAKER_03]: So if somebody's walking around

[00:16:09] [SPEAKER_03]: So if somebody's walking around believing that they're like more or obsessed over off of something superficial like looks

[00:16:17] [SPEAKER_03]: And then that wears off

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_03]: What else you have right? How can you say that he liked you more?

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_03]: He could stop finding you attractive to then what?

[00:16:27] [SPEAKER_03]: There is always a bad a bitch, right?

[00:16:29] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I mean, I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie

[00:16:30] [SPEAKER_06]: So

[00:16:40] [SPEAKER_06]: Um, I always always struggle with that though like figuring out how I love somebody money love me, sir

[00:16:46] [SPEAKER_06]: I was struggled that shit for so long. It's like yo, bro. Is it cuz I do stuff?

[00:16:51] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh, is it cuz well first anything for her is it you first have to

[00:16:57] [SPEAKER_04]: Explain to me come to come to a realization that

[00:17:02] [SPEAKER_04]: You may love somebody in a way where they don't reciprocate the same form of love

[00:17:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Right, so I'm not

[00:17:15] [SPEAKER_04]: Chef Ramsay in the kitchen

[00:17:17] [SPEAKER_04]: right

[00:17:18] [SPEAKER_04]: But the way my woman may show her love for me. Yo, there's this video bro that like every time

[00:17:26] [SPEAKER_04]: This woman gives the guy a plate is wanted like it is so

[00:17:32] [SPEAKER_04]: Fine, I would

[00:17:34] [SPEAKER_04]: Thanks, babe fuck the gym bro big back me up

[00:17:45] [SPEAKER_04]: Exquisite you could tell like the way even the way the meals are presented and the way she brings it to him

[00:17:51] [SPEAKER_04]: That's how she shows her love right if I can't cook

[00:17:54] [SPEAKER_04]: Does she then say I love him more because he doesn't do that for me

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_04]: I brought it or does she come to the realization of the way he shows up for me in this manner is

[00:18:06] [SPEAKER_04]: How I like or how I know now we're not gonna compare cooking to how I show up

[00:18:13] [SPEAKER_04]: Because that's unfair. You can't that's apples and oranges, right? But I

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_04]: I think that's where the issue comes

[00:18:21] [SPEAKER_04]: where people are

[00:18:23] [SPEAKER_04]: too busy

[00:18:25] [SPEAKER_04]: trying to

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_04]: Compare how we're loving instead of enjoying how we're loving because if you sit in there focusing on like oh

[00:18:33] [SPEAKER_04]: I do this more than he do this

[00:18:34] [SPEAKER_04]: So you may be able to do something five times over then I can my one time that don't mean my one ain't worth that

[00:18:40] [SPEAKER_04]: five

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_04]: You know I'm saying so I think

[00:18:45] [SPEAKER_04]: That should stop because you're not even enjoying what you here for and what we here for is for love

[00:18:51] [SPEAKER_06]: Now really playing tip-attentive

[00:18:53] [SPEAKER_04]: Exactly exactly like you said it becomes a competition. I love shouldn't be a tennis match

[00:18:59] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, and I was telling somebody this yesterday like I'm competitive about everything

[00:19:04] [SPEAKER_03]: Except for love like I don't want to compete with my partner. I am about like like

[00:19:11] [SPEAKER_03]: healthily compete as far as like if we know that we not like taking that shit personal and it's just like okay

[00:19:18] [SPEAKER_03]: Let's say she do something for me

[00:19:20] [SPEAKER_03]: My competition is I want to up it

[00:19:26] [SPEAKER_03]: But in a sense we leave it at that and we don't be like when when she get ugly

[00:19:31] [SPEAKER_03]: It's like I remember when I did XYZ

[00:19:34] [SPEAKER_03]: Like no, I don't remember that matter of fact

[00:19:41] [SPEAKER_04]: When when the I

[00:19:45] [SPEAKER_04]: Spoke about that before but when you bring that up

[00:19:47] [SPEAKER_04]: It's like nah, I take that to the edge. That's the only time I'm not literal. I'm extreme

[00:19:52] [SPEAKER_04]: You'd be like yo, remember the time I did that for you. So you saying I couldn't dress myself

[00:19:56] [SPEAKER_04]: You call me a bum ass

[00:20:03] [SPEAKER_03]: When you talk about like if somebody's considering a prize you have to end up competing to get a prize, right?

[00:20:10] [SPEAKER_03]: Bro like I have no interest in competing and well, let's hold on. I wrote down some

[00:20:17] [SPEAKER_04]: Sports. No, I wrote down some things right some qualities that can make somebody feel like a prize

[00:20:23] [SPEAKER_04]: And it's all outside of looks so we just talking pure

[00:20:29] [SPEAKER_04]: Right, I bet I think you like this one. They're at that the

[00:20:37] [SPEAKER_04]: adaptability and generosity

[00:20:39] [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, okay, so

[00:20:42] [SPEAKER_04]: So when you when you have when you meet somebody

[00:20:46] [SPEAKER_04]: You have your own ways. I

[00:20:49] [SPEAKER_04]: Have my own way, right?

[00:20:51] [SPEAKER_04]: But my ability or your her ability to adapt

[00:20:57] [SPEAKER_04]: to

[00:20:58] [SPEAKER_04]: The relationship because certain things that certain things that you was doing on your own like for me for example

[00:21:06] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm not like really keen on or not keen. It just may slip my mind of when I enter the home

[00:21:12] [SPEAKER_04]: I don't say y'all. I'm home. I

[00:21:15] [SPEAKER_04]: Feel like I got my location now. I could just look right

[00:21:19] [SPEAKER_04]: But

[00:21:22] [SPEAKER_04]: My person may think or my person may like, you know, hey you could have told me you were home, right?

[00:21:30] [SPEAKER_04]: cool me adapting to her like

[00:21:33] [SPEAKER_04]: Me not being so caught up in my own way that now I don't do this for nobody

[00:21:38] [SPEAKER_04]: You know, whatever we have those reasons where we don't bend or fold but we adapt to

[00:21:45] [SPEAKER_03]: Make them feel like yo, you're worthy. Yeah, I experienced that in reverse like I'm not used to like

[00:21:51] [SPEAKER_03]: Saying bye or hugging people before I leave. Yeah, I'm really Irish. Come on. It's not even Irish

[00:21:57] [SPEAKER_03]: It's more so like I'm leaving like type. Mm-hmm, and you know, I'm just I was never used to like

[00:22:03] [SPEAKER_03]: The hug kiss I'm leaving. Mm-hmm, and then I had to learn like okay when you in a situation with somebody who's like that

[00:22:10] [SPEAKER_03]: It's like I

[00:22:12] [SPEAKER_03]: This might be the last time. Yeah

[00:22:16] [SPEAKER_03]: It's not difficult but it's just the person needs to understand that if I'm not used to that don't take it personal

[00:22:23] [SPEAKER_03]: With me because yeah, let me learn respectfully if I don't hug and kiss my mom am I saying it's right but

[00:22:31] [SPEAKER_03]: That's just what we do here. Yeah, it's just

[00:22:35] [SPEAKER_04]: The that's what I'm saying the person that you know that they're breaking a habit

[00:22:39] [SPEAKER_04]: Yes, and in and the habit doesn't have to be bad. It's just something it's a routine routine

[00:22:44] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, right to accommodate something that you like that could make me feel like yo, I'm a

[00:22:50] [SPEAKER_04]: Thank you, I appreciate that somebody's efforts into just making you happy and it does nothing for them

[00:22:58] [SPEAKER_04]: No, I feel like I want something here. That's a great personality trait right now. Listen another one

[00:23:06] [SPEAKER_04]: emotional intelligence and empathy

[00:23:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Anybody I can display that

[00:23:14] [SPEAKER_04]: Emotional intelligence and empathy

[00:23:21] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm gonna just throw out some things there sense of humor and positivity

[00:23:29] [SPEAKER_03]: Why you

[00:23:39] [SPEAKER_04]: Space for vulnerability, you know, I'm saying

[00:23:44] [SPEAKER_04]: Mm-hmm

[00:23:46] [SPEAKER_04]: Where my vulnerability feels the safest with you or I don't even have to question

[00:23:53] [SPEAKER_04]: anything as far as

[00:23:55] [SPEAKER_04]: You looking at me less. I could feel like I find that

[00:24:01] [SPEAKER_04]: No

[00:24:02] [SPEAKER_04]: ambition and drive

[00:24:04] [SPEAKER_04]: Mm-hmm. I think that's the some of the stuff that I wrote. We already know like loyalty and honesty

[00:24:14] [SPEAKER_04]: Respectfulness and kindness I

[00:24:18] [SPEAKER_04]: Would like I would like that that to me is like yo empathy

[00:24:25] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

[00:24:27] [SPEAKER_04]: so I think there are some quality traces outside of having a beautiful woman because

[00:24:33] [SPEAKER_04]: But I put in a group chat all the time

[00:24:36] [SPEAKER_04]: Not even that you know every time I thought baddie in the chat. I'd be like see that's my problem

[00:24:42] [SPEAKER_04]: I want I want a woman who look like this, but treat me good

[00:24:57] [SPEAKER_03]: With all those qualities that you just named and feeling like you have the prize. Mm-hmm. What if

[00:25:04] [SPEAKER_03]: The prize is negative traits

[00:25:08] [SPEAKER_03]: Overshadow those those those beautiful things you named I think that's impossible. That's still a prize. I think that's impossible

[00:25:13] [SPEAKER_04]: It's impossible. Yeah, it's a hostess somebody to have. All right, the only seat I

[00:25:20] [SPEAKER_04]: Can you can name a negative trait and there's a trait here that will counter that so I don't think you can

[00:25:27] [SPEAKER_04]: enable both right so I could go as extreme as

[00:25:32] [SPEAKER_04]: They're abusive right

[00:25:35] [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, let's say they're abusive if they if they are respectful and con I don't think they have the

[00:25:42] [SPEAKER_04]: Ability not ability because we all have the ability

[00:25:45] [SPEAKER_04]: But they will have the wherewithal not to order restraint to do it. Nah, no way

[00:25:50] [SPEAKER_03]: There's nobody that's a that can be abusive and respectful in kind. That's what I'm saying

[00:25:57] [SPEAKER_04]: You were saying what if they have a negative I don't think with with with these core attributes

[00:26:05] [SPEAKER_04]: I don't think they can

[00:26:07] [SPEAKER_04]: Be that negative or would display now granted. Nobody's perfect. That's right. I don't want to buy beating on y'all

[00:26:14] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah domestic violence. Um, I don't I don't uh, I

[00:26:20] [SPEAKER_04]: Don't think I'm not looking for perfection

[00:26:23] [SPEAKER_04]: but

[00:26:24] [SPEAKER_04]: When you know how to check yourself

[00:26:47] [SPEAKER_04]: So, yeah, I think I think

[00:26:50] [SPEAKER_04]: when those happen

[00:26:52] [SPEAKER_04]: You know you with nobody with nobody being perfect

[00:26:57] [SPEAKER_04]: Somebody's bound to fuck up. But the person to come to you and say hey, I

[00:27:02] [SPEAKER_04]: Was bugging I like the way I treated you

[00:27:13] [SPEAKER_05]: I

[00:27:47] [SPEAKER_04]: I

[00:27:54] [SPEAKER_04]: Think oh did that?

[00:27:56] [SPEAKER_04]: The bunking the myth about love in

[00:28:02] [SPEAKER_04]: inequalities and discuss the importance of mutual affection and effort.

[00:28:09] [SPEAKER_04]: So he debunked that very early in the spot.

[00:28:11] [SPEAKER_03]: Right away.

[00:28:12] [SPEAKER_03]: I had to though, because I think that's the tone that ... If we don't attach that to it

[00:28:18] [SPEAKER_03]: early bro, we'll go down another rabbit hole of these ideas of who like who more and I'm

[00:28:26] [SPEAKER_03]: against it.

[00:28:27] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm sorry.

[00:28:27] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm sorry if I'm a party pooper.

[00:28:29] [SPEAKER_03]: Nah, nah, nah.

[00:28:30] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm not going to lie.

[00:28:32] [SPEAKER_03]: I've been feeling that since I was a teenager, yo.

[00:28:35] [SPEAKER_03]: What you mean?

[00:28:36] [SPEAKER_03]: I love you more.

[00:28:37] [SPEAKER_03]: I love you more.

[00:28:37] [SPEAKER_03]: I love you more.

[00:28:38] [SPEAKER_03]: I know it's cool to say.

[00:28:39] [SPEAKER_03]: It's cool to say like, oh, who like who more?

[00:28:42] [SPEAKER_03]: That sound cool, but bro, when you really think about it, imagine sitting there-

[00:28:48] [SPEAKER_03]: Having a debate?

[00:28:49] [SPEAKER_03]: Just debating with your partner.

[00:28:51] [SPEAKER_03]: The thing about it is though-

[00:28:52] [SPEAKER_06]: Where's the rules?

[00:28:53] [SPEAKER_06]: The thing about it with me is just like, yo, I'm just glad you love me though.

[00:28:56] [SPEAKER_03]: Thank you.

[00:28:58] [SPEAKER_03]: Thank you.

[00:28:59] [SPEAKER_03]: Is that enough?

[00:28:59] [SPEAKER_03]: That's enough.

[00:29:00] [SPEAKER_03]: That scared me just now.

[00:29:01] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm just glad you love me.

[00:29:03] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm glad you love me.

[00:29:04] [SPEAKER_03]: Class participation?

[00:29:05] [SPEAKER_03]: Bro, no.

[00:29:06] [SPEAKER_03]: You see, if you look at it that way-

[00:29:07] [SPEAKER_06]: See, I was trying to say it's an e for effort.

[00:29:08] [SPEAKER_06]: I don't like to-

[00:29:08] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, nah, nah, nah.

[00:29:10] [SPEAKER_04]: All right, so tell me more.

[00:29:11] [SPEAKER_04]: Tell me more.

[00:29:12] [SPEAKER_04]: Tell me more.

[00:29:13] [SPEAKER_06]: You're loving me, but you're showing me you love me.

[00:29:18] [SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying?

[00:29:19] [SPEAKER_06]: She put in the effort.

[00:29:20] [SPEAKER_06]: She's doing this, she's doing that.

[00:29:21] [SPEAKER_03]: The problem is if it comes to a comparable thing where it's who likes who more, it leaves

[00:29:27] [SPEAKER_03]: room for somebody to then use that as a leveraging point to say, I deserve more or I expect.

[00:29:39] [SPEAKER_03]: All these things that feel very nitpicky.

[00:29:43] [SPEAKER_03]: Let me show you-

[00:29:43] [SPEAKER_03]: Somebody could be trying their best.

[00:29:45] [SPEAKER_06]: What if their best is not enough though for that person?

[00:29:47] [SPEAKER_03]: That's just what it is.

[00:29:48] [SPEAKER_03]: It's not about-

[00:29:49] [SPEAKER_06]: So do you stay there then?

[00:29:52] [SPEAKER_03]: You can't stick your chest out like, oh, well, I like you more so-

[00:29:55] [SPEAKER_06]: No, my thing is do you stay there then?

[00:29:56] [SPEAKER_06]: If what that person is giving is their best effort, it's not enough.

[00:30:00] [SPEAKER_06]: Leave.

[00:30:01] [SPEAKER_04]: Leave.

[00:30:02] [SPEAKER_06]: What if it's not the easiest-

[00:30:03] [SPEAKER_04]: It never is easy, but I mean-

[00:30:05] [SPEAKER_04]: But yeah, that don't mean that you love them more because you aren't appreciative of their

[00:30:13] [SPEAKER_04]: enough, you just greedy.

[00:30:16] [SPEAKER_04]: You know what I'm saying?

[00:30:17] [SPEAKER_04]: If I prepare dinner for you and after the meal you still hungry-

[00:30:25] [SPEAKER_06]: It doesn't take away from what I do.

[00:30:26] [SPEAKER_04]: Exactly.

[00:30:27] [SPEAKER_04]: That don't take away my full-

[00:30:29] [SPEAKER_04]: Nobody told you to be a soup.

[00:30:32] [SPEAKER_05]: I ain't gonna do it.

[00:30:34] [SPEAKER_05]: Come on, you don't vacation huffing and puffing after every five steps.

[00:30:39] [SPEAKER_05]: I'm trying.

[00:30:41] [SPEAKER_05]: He's back at it, y'all.

[00:30:43] [SPEAKER_06]: He's back at it, y'all.

[00:30:46] [SPEAKER_05]: Nah, let me stop.

[00:30:47] [SPEAKER_05]: I'm talking too much.

[00:30:48] [SPEAKER_05]: You're pretending.

[00:30:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I think I got that one too, but I got 100%.

[00:30:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I ain't gonna lie.

[00:30:58] [SPEAKER_06]: I ain't even adding on to that one, though.

[00:31:00] [SPEAKER_06]: I ain't gonna front my answer to that one.

[00:31:01] [SPEAKER_06]: I got to check that.

[00:31:02] [SPEAKER_06]: I'ma leave that one where it's at, bro.

[00:31:04] [SPEAKER_06]: I don't want this one.

[00:31:05] [SPEAKER_06]: I'ma let that one go.

[00:31:06] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh shit.

[00:31:08] [SPEAKER_04]: Shout out to Shayna.

[00:31:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Shayna just closed her rings.

[00:31:11] [SPEAKER_04]: Let me read something to you, right?

[00:31:15] [SPEAKER_04]: A woman said recently, she quoted the topic that we're talking about.

[00:31:20] [SPEAKER_04]: Your man should not like you more than him.

[00:31:22] [SPEAKER_04]: She said, aka my partner loves themselves so little that they don't even care if I love

[00:31:28] [SPEAKER_04]: them as much.

[00:31:29] [SPEAKER_04]: Is incredibly sinister on so many levels and for so many reasons.

[00:31:34] [SPEAKER_04]: One of the reasons she said, dating a man with no self-respect who would disgust me, but y'all

[00:31:41] [SPEAKER_04]: do.

[00:31:42] [SPEAKER_04]: Damn.

[00:31:42] [SPEAKER_04]: She better put a bullet on that.

[00:31:44] [SPEAKER_04]: That sounded ...

[00:31:45] [SPEAKER_06]: That was disgusting.

[00:31:49] [SPEAKER_04]: That was shooting at somebody.

[00:31:50] [SPEAKER_04]: She's saying if you love somebody more than they love you, that's a lack of self-love

[00:31:55] [SPEAKER_04]: on your part.

[00:31:58] [SPEAKER_04]: I could see that.

[00:32:00] [SPEAKER_04]: You see the problem right there?

[00:32:01] [SPEAKER_04]: You see the problem?

[00:32:03] [SPEAKER_04]: What am I supposed to do?

[00:32:04] [SPEAKER_04]: You know ...

[00:32:05] [SPEAKER_04]: Love you less?

[00:32:06] [SPEAKER_04]: No, no, no.

[00:32:07] [SPEAKER_04]: Who am I supposed to love?

[00:32:07] [SPEAKER_04]: No, no, no.

[00:32:08] [SPEAKER_04]: Pete Gange.

[00:32:08] [SPEAKER_04]: Now I'm getting heated now.

[00:32:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Pete Gange.

[00:32:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Pete Gange.

[00:32:11] [SPEAKER_04]: There are people who want to be loved so badly, they overcompensate on the love they give.

[00:32:19] [SPEAKER_04]: That's love bombing, ain't it?

[00:32:21] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah, not necessarily.

[00:32:23] [SPEAKER_04]: But they're trying to dig that love out of you by over-exerting, always going above and

[00:32:34] [SPEAKER_04]: beyond the fact where it does look like you lack self-respect for yourself.

[00:32:39] [SPEAKER_04]: You can't see that this person don't fuck with you?

[00:32:42] [SPEAKER_03]: Are you in a relationship with somebody who don't fuck with you?

[00:32:45] [SPEAKER_03]: Is that a real thing?

[00:32:46] [SPEAKER_03]: Yo, Coltrane, that's a real thing, bro.

[00:32:47] [SPEAKER_03]: Get the fuck out of here, bro.

[00:32:49] [SPEAKER_05]: I'm not going to lie.

[00:32:49] [SPEAKER_06]: People, like I said-

[00:32:50] [SPEAKER_06]: Aight, Coltrane.

[00:32:50] [SPEAKER_06]: Can we just start naming names and then punch back?

[00:32:53] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, bro.

[00:32:55] [SPEAKER_06]: You don't know people.

[00:32:56] [SPEAKER_06]: Did I say that in this episode or last episode?

[00:32:58] [SPEAKER_06]: Bro, people can be in hostage relationships, bro.

[00:33:01] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, bro.

[00:33:02] [SPEAKER_04]: It sounds crazy to you because it's one of those that could never be me.

[00:33:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.

[00:33:10] [SPEAKER_04]: So when you have that it could never be me, or I have so much respect for myself that

[00:33:15] [SPEAKER_04]: I can't see this happen doesn't mean that it doesn't happen.

[00:33:19] [SPEAKER_06]: Another thing is you could love somebody, but you don't have to like them.

[00:33:22] [SPEAKER_06]: That's another thing.

[00:33:24] [SPEAKER_04]: There are times where I don't like my partner, I love you.

[00:33:28] [SPEAKER_04]: That I can understand.

[00:33:29] [SPEAKER_06]: There's some times I don't like you, but I still like you.

[00:33:31] [SPEAKER_03]: But that I can understand.

[00:33:34] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah.

[00:33:35] [SPEAKER_06]: Some people just be hostage in relationships.

[00:33:37] [SPEAKER_06]: They don't know how to get out of them or it's the only thing they know.

[00:33:40] [SPEAKER_06]: I don't really fuck with you no more, bro.

[00:33:41] [SPEAKER_06]: We're just here out of comfortability.

[00:33:43] [SPEAKER_03]: There's not many statements that make me cringe.

[00:33:45] [SPEAKER_03]: That one, I'm sorry.

[00:33:46] [SPEAKER_03]: Every time I hear it, I'm just going to...

[00:33:47] [SPEAKER_03]: Which one?

[00:33:49] [SPEAKER_03]: Like you more than...

[00:33:51] [SPEAKER_03]: I love you more than...

[00:33:52] [SPEAKER_03]: Oh God.

[00:33:53] [SPEAKER_03]: Somebody loves you more than they love me.

[00:33:54] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm telling you, I could search this on Twitter right now and let's see what we...

[00:34:01] [SPEAKER_03]: Maybe I'm too logical.

[00:34:03] [SPEAKER_04]: And screenshot it so I can put it at the bottom of the...

[00:34:05] [SPEAKER_04]: That's a thing too?

[00:34:06] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.

[00:34:07] [SPEAKER_04]: When you operate out of logic sometimes, anything that sounds nuts, you just can't even fathom that.

[00:34:16] [SPEAKER_03]: A couple weeks ago, we were discussing 0 to 100.

[00:34:19] [SPEAKER_03]: We all displayed that we all start at different points when we're professing our interests

[00:34:26] [SPEAKER_03]: or whatever the case may be.

[00:34:26] [SPEAKER_03]: I said 50.

[00:34:28] [SPEAKER_03]: What did you say?

[00:34:28] [SPEAKER_03]: 100.

[00:34:29] [SPEAKER_03]: 100.

[00:34:29] [SPEAKER_03]: You was 100.

[00:34:30] [SPEAKER_03]: Quanie was 75.

[00:34:32] [SPEAKER_03]: Is that how you start to pinpoint who likes who more?

[00:34:37] [SPEAKER_03]: Depending on...

[00:34:38] [SPEAKER_03]: If I come out at 50, does that mean that I got 50 more steps to go to get to 100?

[00:34:42] [SPEAKER_03]: Then that means I'm at the max.

[00:34:44] [SPEAKER_03]: And then is it an up and down meter of we're going?

[00:34:47] [SPEAKER_03]: No, I don't believe that's how...

[00:34:49] [SPEAKER_04]: No, no, no.

[00:34:50] [SPEAKER_04]: All right.

[00:34:50] [SPEAKER_04]: So boom, I put it, right?

[00:34:52] [SPEAKER_04]: Let's listen to the first three.

[00:34:56] [SPEAKER_04]: She said the same thing.

[00:34:57] [SPEAKER_04]: A man is always supposed to like you more than you like him for it to ever be able to

[00:35:03] [SPEAKER_04]: work.

[00:35:03] [SPEAKER_04]: I've always said that and I will always believe that.

[00:35:06] [SPEAKER_04]: Don't at me.

[00:35:07] [SPEAKER_04]: And then the next person said, my mom always told me your man should love you more than

[00:35:13] [SPEAKER_04]: you love him.

[00:35:14] [SPEAKER_04]: Not...

[00:35:15] [SPEAKER_04]: Who was that?

[00:35:16] [SPEAKER_05]: G?

[00:35:17] [SPEAKER_04]: I can't even express myself no more.

[00:35:20] [SPEAKER_04]: G's doing it for me.

[00:35:21] [SPEAKER_04]: Not saying it isn't equal, but most women love our men more than they love us.

[00:35:27] [SPEAKER_04]: Last one.

[00:35:29] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm a firm believer that if a man you are with has...

[00:35:33] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm sorry.

[00:35:34] [SPEAKER_04]: She's grammatically incorrect.

[00:35:36] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm a firm believer that the man you are with has to like slash love you more than you do

[00:35:41] [SPEAKER_04]: him in order the relationship to last.

[00:35:43] [SPEAKER_04]: That man will be afraid to hurt you because breaking your heart will break his.

[00:35:47] [SPEAKER_04]: Those are the kind of men that should be valued, loved and protected.

[00:35:52] [SPEAKER_03]: And ladies, if you are sitting in a relationship with a man that loves you more than you love

[00:35:55] [SPEAKER_03]: him, you're going to fail.

[00:35:57] [SPEAKER_03]: Just telling you that.

[00:35:58] [SPEAKER_03]: Just think about that statement.

[00:36:00] [SPEAKER_03]: Somebody loves you more than you love them.

[00:36:02] [SPEAKER_03]: That means that you are not giving your all.

[00:36:04] [SPEAKER_03]: You're not reaching your full potential because you care about what these people are saying

[00:36:07] [SPEAKER_03]: on the fucking internet.

[00:36:08] [SPEAKER_06]: I ain't gonna lie, you are furious.

[00:36:09] [SPEAKER_03]: Bro, it sounds so dumb.

[00:36:12] [SPEAKER_03]: It sounds so dumb.

[00:36:15] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm going to pull back and let him love me more than I can love him because of what these

[00:36:21] [SPEAKER_03]: fucking statements are saying.

[00:36:22] [SPEAKER_03]: What are you talking about?

[00:36:22] [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, what if her all, right?

[00:36:25] [SPEAKER_04]: Her all.

[00:36:26] [SPEAKER_04]: His all eclipses her all.

[00:36:28] [SPEAKER_04]: So like say this is all of her, right?

[00:36:31] [SPEAKER_04]: And this is all of him.

[00:36:33] [SPEAKER_04]: So that little, that extra is...

[00:36:36] [SPEAKER_06]: What if he grew up in a household that he saw love and she didn't grow up in a household

[00:36:41] [SPEAKER_06]: with love?

[00:36:42] [SPEAKER_03]: Does that make her un...

[00:36:46] [SPEAKER_03]: See, I ain't gonna put these niggas in smoke.

[00:36:48] [SPEAKER_03]: Does that make her incapable of loving?

[00:36:53] [SPEAKER_06]: It's probably, that's why he probably feels like, yeah, I love you more than you love

[00:36:57] [SPEAKER_06]: me.

[00:36:57] [SPEAKER_03]: That's why I want to go back to how do we quantify it?

[00:37:00] [SPEAKER_03]: If we can quantify it and you can show me that this is the love bucket and this is how

[00:37:05] [SPEAKER_03]: much love I'm pouring into this bucket because it's mine.

[00:37:08] [SPEAKER_03]: Show me your love bucket.

[00:37:09] [SPEAKER_03]: Show me how much love you're pouring into your love bucket and then we can quantify it.

[00:37:13] [SPEAKER_03]: If somebody can show me that in life, I'll shut the fuck up.

[00:37:15] [SPEAKER_03]: I promise you.

[00:37:16] [SPEAKER_03]: I won't ever complain about it no more.

[00:37:18] [SPEAKER_03]: But until somebody can show me who loves who more and how they are quantifying it, that's

[00:37:24] [SPEAKER_03]: the word of the day, I'll shut up.

[00:37:27] [SPEAKER_03]: I'll shut up if somebody can show me that.

[00:37:29] [SPEAKER_03]: Simple.

[00:37:30] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm sorry.

[00:37:30] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm sorry.

[00:37:31] [SPEAKER_03]: I'm party pooper today.

[00:37:32] [SPEAKER_06]: No, so at any point, at any relationship you were in, did you feel like you loved the person

[00:37:38] [SPEAKER_06]: more than they loved you?

[00:37:39] [SPEAKER_06]: I didn't think it was possible to.

[00:37:41] [SPEAKER_06]: Did that other person, your other partner?

[00:37:43] [SPEAKER_03]: If my partner ever said it to me, I would be insulted.

[00:37:46] [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, I like you more than you like me.

[00:37:49] [SPEAKER_03]: What the fuck is you talking about?

[00:37:51] [SPEAKER_03]: Like what the fuck is you talking about, man?

[00:37:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[00:37:57] [SPEAKER_00]: What the fuck?

[00:37:58] [SPEAKER_00]: What the fuck?

[00:38:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Yo, I really love the woman.

[00:38:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Nah, shut up!

[00:38:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Do you know how I felt about this before you put this fucking topic out, bro?

[00:38:07] [SPEAKER_01]: I do want to shout out to Ruben.

[00:38:10] [SPEAKER_04]: Ruben passed his registry today.

[00:38:16] [SPEAKER_04]: So my man is officially, you know, I won't say his job of employment, but the person

[00:38:23] [SPEAKER_04]: that he's...

[00:38:24] [SPEAKER_04]: Well, I can't even say it.

[00:38:25] [SPEAKER_06]: I can't even say it.

[00:38:26] [SPEAKER_06]: We're that co-prodly, my bro.

[00:38:28] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, yeah.

[00:38:29] [SPEAKER_04]: We're your co-prodly, bro.

[00:38:30] [SPEAKER_04]: You deserved it.

[00:38:31] [SPEAKER_04]: But look, look, look, look, look how he told me he passed.

[00:38:40] [SPEAKER_04]: Certified.

[00:38:41] [SPEAKER_04]: Look at the green check.

[00:38:42] [SPEAKER_04]: Look at it.

[00:38:43] [SPEAKER_04]: Look how he start.

[00:38:44] [SPEAKER_04]: Don't say it.

[00:38:45] [SPEAKER_05]: Let me see.

[00:38:47] [SPEAKER_03]: I didn't read it.

[00:38:48] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

[00:38:49] [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, that's a lot of...

[00:38:50] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

[00:38:50] [SPEAKER_03]: It is a sick fuck.

[00:38:53] [SPEAKER_03]: I don't care about my...

[00:38:57] [SPEAKER_06]: This work email is going berserk-owitz.

[00:39:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Yo, shout out to my nigga Ruben.

[00:39:06] [SPEAKER_01]: My son Black Velvet.

[00:39:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, yeah.

[00:39:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:39:11] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm sorry.

[00:39:12] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah, but yeah, Ruben deserved that boy.

[00:39:13] [SPEAKER_04]: You deserve that.

[00:39:14] [SPEAKER_04]: You deserve that.

[00:39:15] [SPEAKER_04]: Congratulations, bro.

[00:39:16] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to shut up.

[00:39:17] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm sorry.

[00:39:18] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah, you valid.

[00:39:19] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah, you valid.

[00:39:19] [SPEAKER_04]: You powdered today.

[00:39:21] [SPEAKER_04]: I think...

[00:39:22] [SPEAKER_04]: I agree.

[00:39:23] [SPEAKER_04]: Let me just state my stance.

[00:39:25] [SPEAKER_04]: I agree.

[00:39:25] [SPEAKER_04]: I don't think...

[00:39:26] [SPEAKER_04]: I've never as miserable and unhappy as people have made me in the past.

[00:39:34] [SPEAKER_04]: I've never sat there and said, I love you more than you love me.

[00:39:38] [SPEAKER_06]: I said it in a joking way, but it's like...

[00:39:40] [SPEAKER_04]: How was that joke received?

[00:39:43] [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, nah, I love you more.

[00:39:43] [SPEAKER_06]: It's like, okay.

[00:39:44] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, that's...

[00:39:46] [SPEAKER_04]: Ooh, so do you think...

[00:39:47] [SPEAKER_04]: It's playful.

[00:39:47] [SPEAKER_04]: It's playful.

[00:39:48] [SPEAKER_04]: Do you think if the person said it first at that moment...

[00:39:51] [SPEAKER_04]: I love you?

[00:39:52] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.

[00:39:53] [SPEAKER_04]: That they love you more?

[00:39:54] [SPEAKER_04]: I got to say it or I got to just...

[00:39:56] [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, shut up, bro.

[00:39:58] [SPEAKER_05]: Nah, you want to podcast, nigga?

[00:40:00] [SPEAKER_05]: All right.

[00:40:02] [SPEAKER_05]: I'm the first...

[00:40:03] [SPEAKER_05]: I confess my love first.

[00:40:04] [SPEAKER_05]: That means I'm the first.

[00:40:04] [SPEAKER_05]: That means I love you first, not more.

[00:40:07] [SPEAKER_06]: What if she never said it?

[00:40:09] [SPEAKER_05]: What if you don't love them?

[00:40:12] [SPEAKER_06]: Okay, now you bought it.

[00:40:13] [SPEAKER_03]: Look, that might be the only meter to say who loves who more in a situation.

[00:40:19] [SPEAKER_03]: If I don't love you and you love me, you love me more than I love you.

[00:40:23] [SPEAKER_03]: That is it.

[00:40:26] [SPEAKER_04]: So you tell them you can catch up?

[00:40:28] [SPEAKER_04]: I think so.

[00:40:29] [SPEAKER_04]: If we're doing the meter right, they're here, right?

[00:40:32] [SPEAKER_04]: And you're still here.

[00:40:34] [SPEAKER_04]: So I'm just so close.

[00:40:35] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm just so close.

[00:40:35] [SPEAKER_04]: They say it right here.

[00:40:38] [SPEAKER_04]: You telling me as they go, you think you will eventually catch up where it's equal?

[00:40:43] [SPEAKER_04]: So my thing is...

[00:40:45] [SPEAKER_06]: What's timeline y'all feel like y'all would fall in love with somebody?

[00:40:48] [SPEAKER_04]: Fall in love?

[00:40:49] [SPEAKER_04]: Fall in love?

[00:40:50] [SPEAKER_04]: I think this is a Lauryn Hill song.

[00:40:52] [SPEAKER_04]: Honestly, I spoke to her last night.

[00:40:54] [SPEAKER_04]: She's sick.

[00:40:58] [SPEAKER_04]: Back me up, please.

[00:41:01] [SPEAKER_05]: This is an episode of What's The Deal?

[00:41:03] [SPEAKER_06]: I have an extra microphone for them, though.

[00:41:05] [SPEAKER_04]: Yo, this nigga LA.

[00:41:07] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh, she believe in my dream already?

[00:41:13] [SPEAKER_06]: This nigga's on 10.

[00:41:15] [SPEAKER_05]: This nigga's easy, bro.

[00:41:16] [SPEAKER_05]: This nigga's on 10, not 9.

[00:41:18] [SPEAKER_05]: This nigga said I'm easy.

[00:41:21] [SPEAKER_05]: I am.

[00:41:24] [SPEAKER_05]: Oh my God, bro.

[00:41:28] [SPEAKER_05]: They said to send me a video.

[00:41:30] [SPEAKER_04]: Nah, Joe sent the video.

[00:41:31] [SPEAKER_04]: I didn't know there was a video.

[00:41:33] [SPEAKER_04]: Watch it open.

[00:41:38] [SPEAKER_05]: It's only entertainment.

[00:41:40] [SPEAKER_05]: Please.

[00:41:40] [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, we just having some fun.

[00:41:42] [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, shit.

[00:41:44] [SPEAKER_06]: But yeah, bro, you feel like damn.

[00:41:48] [SPEAKER_06]: You feel like you can catch up if your person loves you first?

[00:41:50] [SPEAKER_06]: Absolutely.

[00:41:51] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, I do.

[00:41:53] [SPEAKER_06]: Without them stopping?

[00:41:54] [SPEAKER_06]: Huh?

[00:41:54] [SPEAKER_06]: Without them stopping?

[00:41:55] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, why not, bro?

[00:41:57] [SPEAKER_06]: But what's the quickest y'all fell in love before, though?

[00:41:58] [SPEAKER_06]: Quickest.

[00:41:59] [SPEAKER_06]: Like you felt that you knew you was in love.

[00:42:01] [SPEAKER_06]: Shit.

[00:42:04] [SPEAKER_06]: The fastest?

[00:42:05] [SPEAKER_06]: That six moment?

[00:42:06] [SPEAKER_03]: You talking about from meeting to like the first feeling of love?

[00:42:11] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah.

[00:42:13] [SPEAKER_06]: Shit.

[00:42:14] [SPEAKER_06]: I feel like mine was when I wanted to see them every day.

[00:42:17] [SPEAKER_06]: And that was pretty quick.

[00:42:20] [SPEAKER_06]: I think I never said this out loud.

[00:42:21] [SPEAKER_06]: It was probably like a month in.

[00:42:22] [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, damn.

[00:42:23] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, it was like I don't want to be this person.

[00:42:25] [SPEAKER_03]: Now he really a lover boy, y'all.

[00:42:27] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, pretty much.

[00:42:28] [SPEAKER_06]: Your mans.

[00:42:28] [SPEAKER_06]: I used to end up being.

[00:42:30] [SPEAKER_06]: Yo, your mans.

[00:42:31] [SPEAKER_06]: That ain't your mans.

[00:42:32] [SPEAKER_06]: That is your mans, bro.

[00:42:34] [SPEAKER_04]: Yo, your mans, bro.

[00:42:38] [SPEAKER_04]: That shit was crazy.

[00:42:40] [SPEAKER_04]: I feel like it's a scary feeling at first.

[00:42:42] [SPEAKER_04]: It is.

[00:42:43] [SPEAKER_04]: It's even scarier now reflecting on it.

[00:42:47] [SPEAKER_03]: I ain't going to hold you.

[00:42:47] [SPEAKER_03]: My question is, is it the in love feeling that you're talking about or just like, damn,

[00:42:51] [SPEAKER_03]: I love this person?

[00:42:51] [SPEAKER_03]: Like that in love feeling is a step up.

[00:42:53] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:42:54] [SPEAKER_03]: That's true.

[00:42:54] [SPEAKER_03]: Like it's a bit more.

[00:42:55] [SPEAKER_03]: That is very true.

[00:42:56] [SPEAKER_04]: Like, nah, I love this person.

[00:42:56] [SPEAKER_04]: Like, yo, it don't take me long to love a person or love qualities about that person,

[00:43:07] [SPEAKER_04]: you know?

[00:43:08] [SPEAKER_00]: Listen.

[00:43:09] [SPEAKER_04]: But.

[00:43:12] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm on sick of people with the crocodile.

[00:43:15] [SPEAKER_04]: I think it's a cronky.

[00:43:19] [SPEAKER_04]: But so yes, there is a difference.

[00:43:22] [SPEAKER_04]: Me loving you and me being in love with you are two different things.

[00:43:25] [SPEAKER_04]: Yes, sir.

[00:43:25] [SPEAKER_04]: You know what I'm saying?

[00:43:26] [SPEAKER_04]: I could love you.

[00:43:27] [SPEAKER_04]: I could love you.

[00:43:28] [SPEAKER_04]: You know what I'm saying?

[00:43:30] [SPEAKER_04]: I could have your back.

[00:43:32] [SPEAKER_04]: I could have love for you.

[00:43:33] [SPEAKER_04]: I could have love for you.

[00:43:35] [SPEAKER_04]: But being in love with you where, you know, my heart really like is yours.

[00:43:42] [SPEAKER_04]: Like you got a permanent place in there.

[00:43:44] [SPEAKER_04]: You set up shop.

[00:43:45] [SPEAKER_04]: Like, you know, you got 24 hour room service.

[00:43:49] [SPEAKER_04]: Tower warmer.

[00:43:50] [SPEAKER_04]: Tower warmer.

[00:43:51] [SPEAKER_04]: Come on, man.

[00:43:51] [SPEAKER_04]: King size bed.

[00:43:52] [SPEAKER_04]: King size bed.

[00:43:53] [SPEAKER_04]: Let me not say too much.

[00:43:55] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm a jam myself.

[00:43:59] [SPEAKER_04]: I think it's a personal day is crazy.

[00:44:02] [SPEAKER_05]: You think this morning?

[00:44:03] [SPEAKER_05]: What is wrong with the facts?

[00:44:05] [SPEAKER_05]: Because I.

[00:44:09] [SPEAKER_03]: Sick.

[00:44:09] [SPEAKER_03]: But you being a prize, you being a prize in that instance.

[00:44:14] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[00:44:15] [SPEAKER_04]: So but yeah, the fastest, the fastest definitely amazed.

[00:44:19] [SPEAKER_04]: That shit scared me.

[00:44:20] [SPEAKER_04]: That shit scares me to this day, too.

[00:44:22] [SPEAKER_06]: Because it's like.

[00:44:23] [SPEAKER_06]: But think about it at the same time you're scared, but it's like, I was capable of that.

[00:44:29] [SPEAKER_06]: How do you feel about that?

[00:44:30] [SPEAKER_06]: Like I'm capable of this type of love.

[00:44:35] [SPEAKER_06]: I feel like I was like, I was like, yo, Brian, I had this in me.

[00:44:37] [SPEAKER_06]: It was like the householder.

[00:44:39] [SPEAKER_06]: It's action you talk about like an action happened.

[00:44:41] [SPEAKER_06]: No, it's just that the feeling is more like, yo.

[00:44:45] [SPEAKER_06]: What if they told you that?

[00:44:46] [SPEAKER_04]: What if somebody told you that?

[00:44:48] [SPEAKER_06]: Well, I know.

[00:44:49] [SPEAKER_04]: Even even though me and you didn't work out.

[00:44:52] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm glad you showed me I'm capable of loving again.

[00:44:56] [SPEAKER_06]: Huge.

[00:44:57] Yeah.

[00:45:00] [SPEAKER_06]: I just got upset.

[00:45:02] [SPEAKER_06]: You should go for it.

[00:45:03] [SPEAKER_06]: I appreciate you telling me that, but keep it to yourself.

[00:45:06] [SPEAKER_04]: Yo, bro.

[00:45:07] [SPEAKER_04]: Hold on.

[00:45:08] [SPEAKER_04]: Quani outside.

[00:45:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Hold on.

[00:45:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Quani said the door double M2.

[00:45:11] [SPEAKER_04]: Let me see from a panel.

[00:45:14] [SPEAKER_04]: Quani is outside.

[00:45:15] [SPEAKER_06]: That just pissed me off.

[00:45:19] [SPEAKER_04]: Quani standing in the door.

[00:45:21] [SPEAKER_04]: He coming in.

[00:45:22] [SPEAKER_04]: All right.

[00:45:25] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:45:26] [SPEAKER_04]: So, yeah, I don't know if I don't know how I feel about somebody coming to the realization that there, you know, it's kind of like you.

[00:45:40] [SPEAKER_04]: They fell off their bike.

[00:45:42] [SPEAKER_04]: They scared to ride a bike and you hear their training.

[00:45:45] [SPEAKER_04]: You're their training wheel.

[00:45:47] [SPEAKER_04]: And now they're ready to take the training wheels off and actually fully ride.

[00:45:51] [SPEAKER_06]: I said this in a relationship, though.

[00:45:54] [SPEAKER_06]: I appreciate you for showing me that I could love.

[00:45:58] [SPEAKER_06]: Seeing that at the relationship is like that's something crazy.

[00:46:00] [SPEAKER_06]: That means you're dead moving on.

[00:46:04] [SPEAKER_06]: True indeed.

[00:46:05] [SPEAKER_06]: He has got upset again.

[00:46:06] [SPEAKER_06]: Thanks guys.

[00:46:09] [SPEAKER_04]: But now I definitely think that all in all, I definitely think the qualities of a person that I describe,

[00:46:20] [SPEAKER_04]: you know, I think it's something that we should all look for in our partner.

[00:46:27] [SPEAKER_04]: And I think we would come to the realization that like, you know, that person is the prize because who doesn't like a good prize?

[00:46:37] [SPEAKER_04]: G, can you get the door for Quani?

[00:46:39] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh, wait.

[00:46:40] [SPEAKER_06]: Hang on front.

[00:46:41] [SPEAKER_06]: My brain is sick.

[00:46:43] [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, my brain is sick.

[00:46:44] [SPEAKER_06]: Why did I just say after eating the thing out the box, I get a prize is crazy.

[00:46:47] [SPEAKER_06]: But let's go.

[00:46:48] [SPEAKER_04]: The Cracker Jack.

[00:46:50] [SPEAKER_04]: Cracker back.

[00:46:55] [SPEAKER_04]: So he did.

[00:46:56] [SPEAKER_04]: OK.

[00:46:57] [SPEAKER_04]: Maybe you went to the bathroom.

[00:46:59] [SPEAKER_04]: You did.

[00:47:01] [SPEAKER_04]: Close up.

[00:47:02] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, close it out.

[00:47:04] [SPEAKER_06]: But yeah, Joe, anything else you want to say about love my person more than I love you?

[00:47:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh, no, no, no.

[00:47:11] [SPEAKER_04]: How do you feel about the prize thing?

[00:47:14] [SPEAKER_04]: As a person who is competitive, who won prizes, trophies, you have gold plaques, trophies.

[00:47:19] [SPEAKER_04]: So you want to platinum plaque.

[00:47:21] [SPEAKER_04]: Sorry, platinum plaque, gold plaque, basketball trophies.

[00:47:27] [SPEAKER_04]: You know, you've been a winner.

[00:47:29] [SPEAKER_04]: You're a winner.

[00:47:30] [SPEAKER_04]: So you know what it's like to be awarded a prize.

[00:47:34] [SPEAKER_04]: So what do you think about the concept of a person being a prize as well?

[00:47:41] [SPEAKER_04]: I think your dad would say is.

[00:47:43] [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, it's funny you say that because I've seen I've now seen my mother in a completely different

[00:47:48] [SPEAKER_03]: light after what we've dealt with as a family.

[00:47:51] [SPEAKER_04]: You saw her as your whole life.

[00:47:53] [SPEAKER_04]: You saw her more as your mom.

[00:47:56] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.

[00:47:56] [SPEAKER_04]: And I think that situation shows she's a wife.

[00:47:59] [SPEAKER_04]: Like I was like, damn.

[00:48:01] [SPEAKER_03]: She's taking care of you.

[00:48:02] [SPEAKER_03]: Bro.

[00:48:02] [SPEAKER_03]: But now she's got time to take care of you.

[00:48:04] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

[00:48:04] [SPEAKER_03]: You know, she like she is always taking care of my dad.

[00:48:07] [SPEAKER_03]: But it was like you saw a different level of emotion behind it.

[00:48:10] [SPEAKER_03]: I think it was a little bit of fear based.

[00:48:13] [SPEAKER_03]: But I saw like for the first time in a while, like that's the love of my life right there.

[00:48:18] [SPEAKER_03]: And she was looking at my father as the love of her life.

[00:48:21] [SPEAKER_03]: And that's when I like that's how I can see in a sense how my mom looks at him like he's

[00:48:27] [SPEAKER_03]: the prize.

[00:48:28] [SPEAKER_03]: She said to us like, yo, like I was driving her back home from the hospital one of these

[00:48:32] [SPEAKER_03]: one of them days, you know, it was all of them for the same.

[00:48:35] [SPEAKER_03]: She just said to like, yo, you know, your dad is our everything.

[00:48:38] [SPEAKER_03]: Like and I was just like, no, you're right.

[00:48:42] [SPEAKER_03]: But her saying that she's about to make me cry.

[00:48:44] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, no, it was one of them days, bro.

[00:48:46] [SPEAKER_03]: And I was just like, yeah, OK.

[00:48:49] [SPEAKER_03]: Like now when she said that, it made me realize, like, OK, taking all negative thoughts

[00:48:54] [SPEAKER_03]: out, we got to step up.

[00:48:55] [SPEAKER_03]: Like everybody got to step up.

[00:48:56] [SPEAKER_03]: Everybody got to make sure everybody is on the point.

[00:48:59] [SPEAKER_03]: But then it just made me realize how much more valuable my father is to me than I may

[00:49:03] [SPEAKER_03]: have noticed even in a small moment.

[00:49:05] [SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying?

[00:49:06] [SPEAKER_03]: And my mom, her experience and our experience as a family helped me realize that a little

[00:49:11] [SPEAKER_03]: bit clearer.

[00:49:12] [SPEAKER_03]: So I can definitely see how somebody, my mother, can see somebody else, her husband, my father

[00:49:18] [SPEAKER_02]: as a prize.

[00:49:19] [SPEAKER_03]: And I think that and they've been together thirty four years, bro.

[00:49:23] [SPEAKER_04]: You know what the crazy thing is not to get like super spiritual, but there is a Bible

[00:49:26] [SPEAKER_04]: verse that says he who finds a good thing, he who finds a wife finds a good thing.

[00:49:31] [SPEAKER_04]: Right.

[00:49:31] [SPEAKER_04]: And this shit called life.

[00:49:35] [SPEAKER_04]: Who don't like a couple of good things?

[00:49:37] [SPEAKER_04]: We like good days.

[00:49:38] [SPEAKER_04]: And when you stack up a couple of good days, you have a good month, you stack up a couple

[00:49:41] [SPEAKER_04]: of good months, you got a good year.

[00:49:43] [SPEAKER_04]: And imagine that.

[00:49:44] [SPEAKER_04]: Imagine a good day with a good person.

[00:49:46] [SPEAKER_04]: He who finds a wife, you know.

[00:49:50] [SPEAKER_04]: Good up ting.

[00:49:51] [SPEAKER_04]: There you go.

[00:49:53] [SPEAKER_04]: That's the job version.

[00:49:54] [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.

[00:49:54] [SPEAKER_06]: So yeah, that shit just sounds beautiful.

[00:49:56] [SPEAKER_06]: I can't lie to you.

[00:49:57] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I definitely believe it's possible to consider somebody a prize.

[00:50:01] [SPEAKER_03]: And even in your earlier definition, I mean, it doesn't really take away from that joyous

[00:50:08] [SPEAKER_03]: feeling.

[00:50:09] [SPEAKER_03]: I mean, you said it's a trophy is something that is only won once.

[00:50:14] [SPEAKER_03]: Like it signifies you wake up every day and you see that person.

[00:50:16] [SPEAKER_03]: You put that trophy up on the wall.

[00:50:18] [SPEAKER_03]: That's an everyday thing.

[00:50:19] [SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying?

[00:50:20] [SPEAKER_03]: You see it every day.

[00:50:21] [SPEAKER_04]: So pay her to the wall.

[00:50:22] [SPEAKER_03]: No, you ain't know that.

[00:50:24] [SPEAKER_06]: End it now.

[00:50:25] [SPEAKER_06]: End it.

[00:50:26] [SPEAKER_06]: End it now.

[00:50:27] [SPEAKER_06]: You can follow me at Stay Focused LA on Instagram and Twitter.

[00:50:35] [SPEAKER_04]: Don't forget to like, comment and subscribe.

[00:50:37] [SPEAKER_04]: All things What's A Good Guy coming out every Monday at whatsogoodguy.com

[00:50:41] [SPEAKER_06]: Sneak it over to Noah Tom.

[00:50:43] [SPEAKER_06]: It be up there.

[00:50:46] [SPEAKER_04]: It be up there.

[00:50:46] [SPEAKER_06]: It should come out the day before if y'all think it's paid attention.

[00:50:48] [SPEAKER_06]: Sure.

[00:50:51] [SPEAKER_04]: You can listen to us on your favorite podcast, DSP.

[00:50:55] [SPEAKER_04]: And you can also watch us on YouTube, you know, tell them where they can follow you, Joe.

[00:51:01] [SPEAKER_03]: If y'all want to debate with me about this, who like who more shit?

[00:51:05] [SPEAKER_03]: At JoeGuyGame.

[00:51:06] [SPEAKER_03]: That's J-O underscore Guy Game.

[00:51:09] [SPEAKER_03]: Don't DM him.

[00:51:10] [SPEAKER_03]: Send him emails.

[00:51:11] [SPEAKER_04]: Can you imagine somebody emailing you about this?

[00:51:15] [SPEAKER_03]: I'll flame your ass up.

[00:51:16] [SPEAKER_03]: Don't even play with me.

[00:51:18] [SPEAKER_06]: I'm sure business hours are tough.

[00:51:22] [SPEAKER_06]: G's in the building.

[00:51:22] [SPEAKER_06]: Mercy.

[00:51:23] [SPEAKER_06]: Kwani just walked in, by the way.

[00:51:25] [SPEAKER_06]: Kwani's here.

[00:51:26] [SPEAKER_04]: I think Kwani would have enjoyed this episode.

[00:51:28] [SPEAKER_04]: Kwani got an A job.

[00:51:30] [SPEAKER_04]: Kwani, this episode was called I Am The Prize.

[00:51:35] [SPEAKER_04]: I'm not going to lie, Kwani.

[00:51:36] [SPEAKER_04]: You looking real militant right now.

[00:51:38] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a color scheme too.

[00:51:39] [SPEAKER_06]: It's like you just whooped somebody's ass.

[00:51:42] [SPEAKER_06]: But until next time, y'all stay cool.

[00:51:45] [SPEAKER_06]: God is good, baby.

[00:51:46] [SPEAKER_06]: All the time, baby.