[00:00:01] This is the fun part where we take all of this out and everybody was wondering what the fuck they were laughing about
[00:00:05] Yeah, what was so funny?
[00:00:08] Subscribe to the Patreon.
[00:00:10] No.
[00:00:11] You just getting up during the pod?
[00:00:13] I'm professional.
[00:00:14] We doing this right?
[00:00:16] Yeah, how the one who said bring a woman in the kitchen.
[00:00:20] I have a monitor, so I need my phone to make sure.
[00:00:24] Oh my God.
[00:00:25] The man.
[00:00:26] Yo, you already know where it is, man.
[00:00:28] Yo, what's your favorite Dominican Dom P's?
[00:00:30] You know what I mean?
[00:00:31] Yeah, I think that's cold, Joe.
[00:00:34] Take it out.
[00:00:35] Take it out.
[00:00:37] Take it out.
[00:00:38] Take it out.
[00:00:39] Is the casting happening?
[00:00:40] I don't know, man.
[00:00:44] Alongside of the short.
[00:00:45] It's another beautiful day here at NYC, man.
[00:00:47] Shout out to all of y'all for like, comment, subscribe and doing everything I do every week.
[00:00:50] We do appreciate y'all.
[00:00:52] Damn, when is this releasing?
[00:00:54] This is the last episode of the year.
[00:00:56] Damn, man.
[00:00:57] It's been a long year.
[00:00:59] We made it here.
[00:01:00] Give thanks.
[00:01:01] You might not be where you want to be right now, but you're here.
[00:01:04] Be happy.
[00:01:06] There's a lot of people didn't make it this fall.
[00:01:09] We're here.
[00:01:10] It's been a while, yeah.
[00:01:10] It's been a, you know.
[00:01:11] It's been a wild motherfucking year.
[00:01:13] But yeah, man.
[00:01:15] What's going on, fellas and lady fellas?
[00:01:17] Cause who is this next to me?
[00:01:18] Who's this on my left?
[00:01:19] Stranger, stranger.
[00:01:20] I never met her before.
[00:01:21] Stranger danger.
[00:01:24] Miss no waste.
[00:01:25] Oh shit.
[00:01:26] Here we go.
[00:01:27] Miss slim us.
[00:01:28] Miss slim us.
[00:01:30] Miss men need to stay in men business.
[00:01:32] Mm-hmm.
[00:01:34] Women need to stay in men business.
[00:01:36] I can't be a men business.
[00:01:39] She is our intern.
[00:01:42] She's the PA.
[00:01:43] She just on the mic today.
[00:01:44] Need the extra.
[00:01:45] I actually just-
[00:01:45] The head of HR.
[00:01:47] The new-
[00:01:47] Yeah.
[00:01:47] What you're here looking for a man?
[00:01:49] That would be a great-
[00:01:51] That'd be a great episode.
[00:01:52] I was just being like a stand in for the camera.
[00:01:54] No, no, no, no.
[00:01:55] That'd be a great episode.
[00:01:56] Like what are you looking for in a man?
[00:01:57] No, no, no, no.
[00:01:58] We should like do like-
[00:01:59] Like a blind date thing.
[00:02:00] The Cheyenne balloon pop.
[00:02:02] I don't-
[00:02:03] Just have the-
[00:02:04] Finally go die.
[00:02:05] Oh, ankles out, pop.
[00:02:07] You gotta go.
[00:02:08] And I'm fast.
[00:02:09] Angles out.
[00:02:10] Oh, where's your hairline?
[00:02:11] You gotta go.
[00:02:13] Is that wrong?
[00:02:15] No.
[00:02:15] Sir, you have tucks on.
[00:02:16] You have to go, sir.
[00:02:17] Yo, it's funny I say that.
[00:02:18] Yesterday was the first time I sat down and watched the pop the balloon show in full on YouTube.
[00:02:23] I was fucking bored.
[00:02:24] And I was like, this is the secondhand embarrassment that I get when everybody pops a balloon on the balloon.
[00:02:29] I be feeling so bad.
[00:02:31] I'm like-
[00:02:32] The Jamaican one be having me laughing.
[00:02:33] I'm like, this nigga's tight.
[00:02:36] Niggas start to fucking curse at everybody else.
[00:02:38] Yeah, this is my type of shit.
[00:02:39] That's the Pate shot episode of the pop of the balloon.
[00:02:41] Oh no.
[00:02:41] Oh my gosh.
[00:02:42] So we gonna find you a man?
[00:02:43] What if we do it for like Valentine's Day?
[00:02:46] Find it.
[00:02:46] You're not with it?
[00:02:48] We'll see.
[00:02:49] What's up?
[00:02:49] All right, cool.
[00:02:50] Yes.
[00:02:53] What's going on in LA?
[00:02:55] Oh man, this episode is long overdue.
[00:02:57] Cheyenne has been on the docket for- since the top of the year.
[00:03:01] Yeah.
[00:03:02] And she's just been ducking us.
[00:03:04] I was never invited until it proved to us.
[00:03:07] Untrue statements.
[00:03:08] Yeah, thank you, John.
[00:03:09] Y'all never gave me a date.
[00:03:10] Oh, we need to have you on the pod.
[00:03:11] We want to see your episodes in my notes.
[00:03:13] No invite, no date.
[00:03:14] Okay.
[00:03:15] We're not even gonna argue, cause one thing we know.
[00:03:19] We never argue with.
[00:03:20] Yeah, we ain't gonna win.
[00:03:21] But Cheyenne has this topic that she mentioned-
[00:03:27] It's a theory.
[00:03:28] All right, so yeah, let's go through this theory.
[00:03:32] Are you a victim or are you a volunteer?
[00:03:36] Whoa.
[00:03:37] What?
[00:03:38] We never talk about this.
[00:03:39] Somebody explain this.
[00:03:40] Somebody explain this.
[00:03:41] What?
[00:03:41] What we talking about here?
[00:03:43] Okay.
[00:03:44] Am I signing myself up for this shit like that?
[00:03:46] You know-
[00:03:47] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:03:48] I mean I have to explain the theory.
[00:03:50] Yeah, go ahead.
[00:03:50] Go ahead.
[00:03:51] Without not giving the person who did something wild to you accountability.
[00:03:55] Sometimes we volunteer for things.
[00:03:57] You can be victimized-
[00:03:58] I know you're new to podcasting, but you gotta talk in the mic.
[00:04:01] You know?
[00:04:03] You're being closer to you.
[00:04:04] You know what I mean?
[00:04:07] Yeah.
[00:04:11] Sorry, my brain is short circuited.
[00:04:13] Typically someone does something wild to you, you're a victim, right?
[00:04:16] Cool.
[00:04:16] But when you keep going back, at some point you volunteered.
[00:04:19] So let's say like if me and Kojo are in a situation, I'm done with Kojo, but I don't
[00:04:24] block him on anything.
[00:04:26] So now he has access to me and I'm hitting LaShawn like, oh my God, LaShawn, Kojo won't
[00:04:29] leave me alone.
[00:04:30] I'm a volunteer at this point.
[00:04:31] It's like them girls that be showing the screenshot of a nigga keep calling, calling,
[00:04:35] calling.
[00:04:36] Right.
[00:04:36] You could've blocked him.
[00:04:37] Word.
[00:04:37] You volunteer for that.
[00:04:39] You didn't set your boundary.
[00:04:40] So sometimes you're a victim, but sometimes you volunteer.
[00:04:43] Yeah, I get that.
[00:04:45] Cause sometimes you wake up, you in a situation and you wake up and you be like, yo, enough
[00:04:50] is enough.
[00:04:51] But you stay knowing that you know.
[00:04:53] I think when you know, when you realize like, all right, this is bullshit and you still
[00:04:59] stay, yeah, you're a volunteer to whatever happens to you.
[00:05:02] So as a friend watching somebody go through that, do you tell them like, yo, you should
[00:05:06] stop.
[00:05:07] What type of friend are they?
[00:05:10] It's me and you.
[00:05:11] Tier A.
[00:05:12] I'll tell you.
[00:05:13] Yeah.
[00:05:13] And if I still keep going, it's like, all right, I'm done talking to you.
[00:05:16] Yeah.
[00:05:16] But you still see me suffering.
[00:05:17] It's like, oh no, no, no, no, no.
[00:05:18] You signed up for that.
[00:05:20] Actually at that point-
[00:05:21] Niggas don't give up.
[00:05:22] So niggas give up.
[00:05:23] So you're giving up on me as a friend.
[00:05:25] I'll pray for you.
[00:05:28] I'll pray for you.
[00:05:29] At that point, you're not the victim.
[00:05:30] The person who's doing it to you is the victim.
[00:05:31] Cause you won't leave them alone.
[00:05:33] Like you-
[00:05:33] That's crazy.
[00:05:36] They're doing all types of wild stuff to you.
[00:05:38] Now they're the victim.
[00:05:40] Okay.
[00:05:40] Okay.
[00:05:41] So how long is the leash that you give, I guess, the individual or yourself before you
[00:05:46] become a victim?
[00:05:47] Because there's still, obviously, isn't there room for you to like-
[00:05:50] Learning, like a learning curve?
[00:05:51] Yeah.
[00:05:52] You know, the grace that is needed to like get-
[00:05:55] Whatever the realization of like, yo, this is ridiculous.
[00:05:59] Like why am I tolerating this?
[00:06:00] What if it's ridiculous from the rip, but-
[00:06:01] Dang, that's-
[00:06:02] Oh, then you volunteered.
[00:06:03] I was like, you signed that paper.
[00:06:05] I ain't gonna lie.
[00:06:06] You sad.
[00:06:07] Cause you had no sweat equity involved.
[00:06:09] People will tell you like who they are really early on.
[00:06:11] We just like tend to ignore-
[00:06:13] We look past it, you know?
[00:06:15] Aw, she's so pretty.
[00:06:17] Aw, she's so cute.
[00:06:18] Is that what y'all say?
[00:06:19] She's so pretty?
[00:06:19] No.
[00:06:21] Yes, it is.
[00:06:22] That pussy-
[00:06:22] No, it's not.
[00:06:23] That shit fire.
[00:06:25] I apologize.
[00:06:27] That shit is a crippling cross face.
[00:06:30] I-
[00:06:30] I-
[00:06:32] Chris Berry.
[00:06:33] We can't-
[00:06:34] We can't make Chris Berry wide jokes.
[00:06:36] I'm sorry.
[00:06:38] No.
[00:06:39] Never, never.
[00:06:40] Oh my God.
[00:06:41] The walls of Jericho.
[00:06:42] We can say the walls of Jericho.
[00:06:43] So like that.
[00:06:45] Why is everybody reminiscing?
[00:06:48] I don't like that.
[00:06:51] I didn't like that.
[00:06:52] I didn't like that.
[00:06:54] Nigga, they just said oh shit.
[00:06:57] That's a great reference.
[00:06:59] My fault.
[00:07:00] My fault.
[00:07:01] Day in the building too.
[00:07:02] Quai in the building.
[00:07:04] You sure?
[00:07:06] Sorry.
[00:07:07] Nigga just ignore Quani and Dine in the back.
[00:07:09] What's the longest you ever been in that mode where it's like, you're literally
[00:07:13] volunteering?
[00:07:15] From my realization to-
[00:07:18] And you just kept going?
[00:07:20] Maybe three years.
[00:07:22] Uh huh.
[00:07:23] You've been a volunteer for three years?
[00:07:25] What made you stick it out for that long though?
[00:07:26] Hope.
[00:07:27] Hope.
[00:07:28] Belief in they will change.
[00:07:30] The sweat equity.
[00:07:32] You know what's something?
[00:07:33] I don't want-
[00:07:34] Wait, wait.
[00:07:34] I'm gonna get too crazy there.
[00:07:36] Three years?
[00:07:37] I-
[00:07:38] Time isn't real.
[00:07:39] You know what's crazy?
[00:07:41] I used to have this mindset.
[00:07:43] Like, I don't want to go through all this bullshit with somebody and then they eventually
[00:07:49] become a better person and somebody benefits from that.
[00:07:52] Nigga, I put in all this work bro.
[00:07:54] That's like, aight.
[00:07:55] That's like me leaving the party.
[00:07:57] I'll continue.
[00:07:58] Somebody comes on and then shit go.
[00:08:00] Nigga, what?
[00:08:02] Nigga, I'm shooting something off.
[00:08:05] Are you crazy?
[00:08:06] Then you gotta-
[00:08:06] But then you gotta say, oh, it was me.
[00:08:08] I was the problem.
[00:08:09] Not necessarily.
[00:08:11] No?
[00:08:11] Mm-mm.
[00:08:11] Cause sometimes when you lose something, you-
[00:08:13] That's the realization that damn I was-
[00:08:15] I was fucking up.
[00:08:16] So I was hoping that the person realized, you know?
[00:08:20] Like, don't lose this.
[00:08:21] Don't let the-
[00:08:22] Don't let your-
[00:08:24] The growth of yourself be-
[00:08:27] So ultimately what got you, after these three years, what got you to make the decision
[00:08:31] to stop being a victim?
[00:08:33] Or volunteer?
[00:08:34] Volunteer.
[00:08:35] Uh, damn.
[00:08:36] How can I say this without-
[00:08:38] Outside entity.
[00:08:40] Another woman?
[00:08:41] No, not another woman.
[00:08:41] Well, her mother.
[00:08:43] Wow.
[00:08:44] Yeah.
[00:08:44] That takes a hell of a-
[00:08:46] Yeah.
[00:08:46] That's a hell of a person to tell you some shit about that.
[00:08:48] In the three years, her mother never revealed herself to you and asked to be the person
[00:08:52] that was gonna help you get over that?
[00:08:54] Or were you stubborn?
[00:08:55] No, her-
[00:08:56] The energy from her mother changed.
[00:09:00] So remember I told you the situation like, yo, I can't marry you because you're-
[00:09:04] Ah, yeah.
[00:09:04] Okay, I'm gonna be discussing it.
[00:09:05] So that-
[00:09:06] So technically, it wasn't even her per se, cause I already had like, yo, I feel like
[00:09:12] you're never gonna change.
[00:09:13] And sometimes that never gonna change.
[00:09:15] Maybe the, you know, the change that I wanted from them maybe wasn't just in them.
[00:09:22] Oh.
[00:09:22] That-
[00:09:23] We got a-
[00:09:24] We had an episode, that's just who they are.
[00:09:26] Mm-hmm.
[00:09:26] You know?
[00:09:26] So I'm more so accepted, okay, this is who you are.
[00:09:30] Mm-hmm.
[00:09:30] Can I live with this?
[00:09:31] I can.
[00:09:32] Am I gonna be the happiest?
[00:09:34] Probably not.
[00:09:36] Um, but I can live with it.
[00:09:37] It's suitable.
[00:09:38] But then when you add the sauce on like, oh, your mother's a mean person.
[00:09:44] That's a-
[00:09:47] Your mother's a mean person.
[00:09:48] So it felt like he was double teaming you at that point.
[00:09:50] Come on, bro.
[00:09:51] It was like, it was like, uh, Devin Booker when he was doing them runs, yo, we just practicing.
[00:09:56] Why we double team?
[00:09:57] Don't double me, bro.
[00:09:58] We just doing a simple run.
[00:10:00] Question, question, Fiat.
[00:10:01] Do you ever look at the person's parents like, yo, this is who you gonna be with the
[00:10:03] old, I'm good?
[00:10:04] Yes.
[00:10:05] As far as looks, maybe.
[00:10:07] No, I meant personality.
[00:10:08] Looks, yeah, but who they are.
[00:10:08] Personality as well.
[00:10:09] No, not necessarily.
[00:10:10] Uh-uh.
[00:10:11] I kinda do that like, yo.
[00:10:12] It's hard to do that when-
[00:10:12] Most women don't know their fathers.
[00:10:18] If women don't know their fathers, y'all don't know y'all dads either.
[00:10:21] Nah, I know my dad.
[00:10:22] My dad was in my life.
[00:10:23] Same.
[00:10:23] I could call him right now.
[00:10:25] You're gonna be a little business call.
[00:10:27] We going dad for dad.
[00:10:30] I was with my dad.
[00:10:32] He might pick up the phone with my dog.
[00:10:34] But Don, what?
[00:10:35] Going dad for dad.
[00:10:40] I'ma lose this crazy.
[00:10:44] Yo, where's this episode going?
[00:10:46] No, I definitely have looked at a guy and been like, oh, your father's still a philanderer.
[00:10:51] And that's your hero?
[00:10:52] Yeah, I'm up out of here.
[00:10:53] Oh.
[00:10:54] Wow.
[00:10:55] You gotta listen to T.I.
[00:10:56] Watch your words segment.
[00:10:57] Oh, he was like a cheater, just doing the most.
[00:11:01] Oh, okay.
[00:11:01] Yeah.
[00:11:02] Now, what if the parent is not the same as their child?
[00:11:07] Like, what if they are two contrasting things?
[00:11:09] Is that something that you-
[00:11:10] I feel like most of the times you get a little bit of your parents.
[00:11:14] You're raised by a similar, most of us are raised by our parents.
[00:11:16] You get a little essence of your parents.
[00:11:17] So it's like, yo.
[00:11:19] Even with my shorty, you'll be like, oh, look at what she doing.
[00:11:21] Like, oh, acting like your mom.
[00:11:22] Now you acting like your dad.
[00:11:23] It's like, oh.
[00:11:23] Dan, what if you rather them be more like their mother than they actually-
[00:11:28] Like, you see the way their mothers are, their dad is, and you're like, why can't
[00:11:32] you be like your parents?
[00:11:33] You think you're gonna say that a lot?
[00:11:34] Yeah, like-
[00:11:36] Imagine how most of our parents just be like, yo, why you don't act like your cousin?
[00:11:40] Tough.
[00:11:41] You wanna hear that shit?
[00:11:41] Oh, they don't get good grades like your cousin.
[00:11:43] You gonna be in that relationship for a long time?
[00:11:45] I was the cousin they wanted.
[00:11:46] Exactly.
[00:11:47] What?
[00:11:48] It depends on the mother though.
[00:11:50] Mm-hmm.
[00:11:50] Because some of them are like overtly domesticated.
[00:11:54] Mm-hmm.
[00:11:55] And it's like-
[00:11:55] Different times.
[00:11:57] Exactly.
[00:11:57] So I can't be like, damn, why you kids be like-
[00:11:59] You can tell your mom just tending to your dad.
[00:12:01] Why you-
[00:12:02] I'm sitting here, I had a long day at work.
[00:12:04] Where am I playing at?
[00:12:05] That shit, that shit'll get you broken up with, y'all.
[00:12:07] There you go, I'm playing that.
[00:12:08] I'm glad we'll never change.
[00:12:10] I had a feeling that's where this was going.
[00:12:12] I like it.
[00:12:13] Because, I'll tell you this.
[00:12:15] Everybody know.
[00:12:16] So, Elizabeth's moms would like literally bring her husband's like-
[00:12:22] Hey.
[00:12:23] On the train?
[00:12:24] On the train.
[00:12:25] Lovely.
[00:12:26] Drink.
[00:12:26] I used to look at her like-
[00:12:30] What's going on?
[00:12:32] You want this ring so bad, show some socks.
[00:12:35] Show me.
[00:12:36] Show some socks.
[00:12:37] Come on.
[00:12:39] Make it worth it.
[00:12:41] You done a picnic.
[00:12:44] Wait, wait, wait.
[00:12:44] You done what?
[00:12:46] Niggas want a luncheon so bad, nigga.
[00:12:49] Oh, you done a picnic.
[00:12:52] Sean's the bag, sorry.
[00:12:53] But um-
[00:12:54] Yo.
[00:12:55] Sean, have you ever been-
[00:12:56] You did a victim?
[00:12:57] Yeah.
[00:12:58] And then after a while, I volunteered.
[00:13:00] Ooh, tell us more.
[00:13:01] Yeah, get into detail about your-
[00:13:02] What she said earlier, Kwani?
[00:13:05] How to ask the questions that we get to running?
[00:13:07] Ask a specific type of question with specific words.
[00:13:10] So, we're asking a specific type of questions.
[00:13:12] Tell us about your victim.
[00:13:13] You're asking clarifying questions.
[00:13:14] Yes.
[00:13:14] Clarifying.
[00:13:15] I hate this.
[00:13:16] Our clarifying question to you is, tell us the time where you realized you was a victim
[00:13:21] and said, you know what?
[00:13:23] I'm now the volunteer.
[00:13:24] And explain your reasoning as to why you chose to be a volunteer.
[00:13:28] Mm-hmm.
[00:13:29] It's less about choosing.
[00:13:30] I think you realize you were a volunteer in retrospect.
[00:13:32] Like in- When I was going through it, I didn't- I wasn't like, yeah, I'm just gonna
[00:13:36] volunteer.
[00:13:37] I genuinely in my head was like, no, this situation might change.
[00:13:40] We might work on things.
[00:13:42] I think you get to the point of being a volunteer once you're out of it and you're like, oh,
[00:13:46] now I see what was going on.
[00:13:48] But it's just when you don't leave the first time.
[00:13:50] Like if somebody gets caught up-
[00:13:51] The first time?
[00:13:53] How many times-
[00:13:54] That's what I'm saying, bro.
[00:13:55] Yeah, I need you to talk to me.
[00:13:56] Like, talk to me.
[00:13:57] Yeah.
[00:13:58] The first time, man?
[00:13:59] In theory, how do you-
[00:14:00] I was up.
[00:14:00] No, no, we're not judging.
[00:14:02] No, no, we're not-
[00:14:02] How do we go again?
[00:14:03] How do we go again?
[00:14:04] We listen and LaShawn judge.
[00:14:08] I'm gonna ask, how do you navigate co-
[00:14:12] like coexisting with another person without fighting through, okay, their flaws?
[00:14:18] Like if we talk about commitment, long-term commitment, it doesn't exist without-
[00:14:23] Well, no.
[00:14:24] I'm talking about like cheating.
[00:14:25] Is that what-
[00:14:26] Is that what-
[00:14:27] Shane-
[00:14:28] The first time-
[00:14:29] Shane and volunteering, we talking about-
[00:14:30] You can't survive a little cheating?
[00:14:31] Shane-
[00:14:32] No, I can't now.
[00:14:33] I used to be able to and now I'm like, that's stupid.
[00:14:35] I was volunteering.
[00:14:36] So-
[00:14:37] Cheating doesn't happen by accident.
[00:14:38] Uh-huh.
[00:14:39] Shane-
[00:14:39] It depends.
[00:14:40] There's a lot of steps that happen.
[00:14:41] It's rare you having a real like-
[00:14:42] Shane-
[00:14:43] Shane-
[00:14:43] Yeah.
[00:14:45] Shane-
[00:14:46] Shane-
[00:14:46] Shane-
[00:14:47] Shane-
[00:14:47] Shane-
[00:14:47] Shane-
[00:14:50] Shane-
[00:15:03] Shane-
[00:15:04] SHYL-
[00:15:04] Shane-
[00:15:05] Shane-
[00:15:05] Shane-
[00:15:05] Dude, okay.
[00:15:15] Shane-
[00:15:15] Shane-
[00:15:15] Shane-
[00:15:15] Shane-
[00:15:17] Shane-
[00:15:17] Shane-
[00:15:17] Shane-
[00:15:18] Walk
[00:15:32] to the guy that
[00:15:34] you'll probably end up with to get
[00:15:36] this version of you knowing there was a
[00:15:39] assault conversion
[00:15:40] that probably would've never taken advantage of.
[00:15:42] They probably got his feet rubbed.
[00:15:43] Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying?
[00:15:46] It's like
[00:15:47] the
[00:15:51] parent that has the
[00:15:52] first kid. They figure out
[00:15:54] all they bumps and bruises
[00:15:56] and they laugh.
[00:15:59] They can be cruising.
[00:16:00] That's not true though. That's why my siblings
[00:16:02] hate on me. Exactly. It's usually
[00:16:04] the opposite. This version of me is
[00:16:06] way more confident, way more sure of myself.
[00:16:08] That version was the one that was like,
[00:16:10] oh, it's okay. We could work through it.
[00:16:12] No. That doesn't mean I'm not soft and
[00:16:14] kind in my relationship. It just means
[00:16:16] I'm strict about that. My non-negotiables
[00:16:18] are non-negotiables versus
[00:16:20] my boundaries being like, eh.
[00:16:23] So after the
[00:16:24] gentleman did all that stuff,
[00:16:26] were you giving
[00:16:28] him a time sheet like, yo, I need to know where you at.
[00:16:30] This time, this time, this time.
[00:16:31] No, because I've also never been like that.
[00:16:33] People do what they want. So I was just like,
[00:16:35] all right, we're going to start from scratch.
[00:16:37] How you found out?
[00:16:39] Oh, yeah.
[00:16:40] You went through a phone.
[00:16:41] You went through a phone.
[00:16:42] Now, now, now.
[00:16:43] Now, now, now.
[00:16:43] Now, now, now.
[00:16:45] You ain't a victim no more. You a villain.
[00:16:47] You ain't a victim. You a villain, nigga.
[00:16:48] No, I was just trying to figure out
[00:16:50] how much I want to divulge.
[00:16:51] So one of my friends
[00:16:54] knew the girl in passing.
[00:16:55] Oh, okay.
[00:16:56] And the girl hit up my friend like,
[00:16:58] oh, do you know such and such?
[00:17:00] Oh, she can't come to you woman to woman?
[00:17:02] No.
[00:17:02] She asked my friend like,
[00:17:04] do you know this dude?
[00:17:05] Is that his girl?
[00:17:06] And she was like, yeah,
[00:17:07] and that's my friend.
[00:17:07] And she sent me the whole conversation.
[00:17:08] She just screenshot it
[00:17:09] and sent me the conversation.
[00:17:10] Nigga said, nigga.
[00:17:12] So I screenshotted it to him.
[00:17:14] Wait, that was your initial finding out?
[00:17:16] Yeah.
[00:17:17] And after that,
[00:17:17] you continued to allow it?
[00:17:20] Well, I mean,
[00:17:21] I didn't know it was still going on,
[00:17:22] but after like,
[00:17:24] you know,
[00:17:24] that period of like,
[00:17:25] ah, reconciliation, we cool.
[00:17:27] Then I went and did some digging
[00:17:28] and I was like,
[00:17:28] yeah, this never stopped.
[00:17:30] Okay.
[00:17:30] I wanted to ask.
[00:17:31] So now that you passed that,
[00:17:32] you've moved on,
[00:17:33] you've matured,
[00:17:34] you've gotten stronger.
[00:17:36] Is there anything else?
[00:17:37] Is there anything in this version of you
[00:17:39] that you would volunteer to?
[00:17:42] Like what?
[00:17:42] Right.
[00:17:43] I'm saying like,
[00:17:43] not the same, right?
[00:17:44] But are there things,
[00:17:46] you know,
[00:17:47] when you get a partner
[00:17:49] that he may do
[00:17:50] that you may turn a blind eye to
[00:17:54] for that same thinking,
[00:17:56] the way you were thinking before,
[00:17:57] but it's just a whole different situation.
[00:17:59] That's tough
[00:18:00] because I won't know it
[00:18:01] until I see it.
[00:18:02] Like, I don't know
[00:18:03] what would make me feel like.
[00:18:04] So the reason why I'm asking that is,
[00:18:05] do you believe that anybody
[00:18:07] is capable of not being a volunteer
[00:18:09] to shit like this?
[00:18:10] No, I think we all do to an extent.
[00:18:12] I don't think it's wrong.
[00:18:13] Right.
[00:18:14] I don't think there's like
[00:18:14] an inherently bad thing.
[00:18:16] About volunteering
[00:18:18] through things that we know,
[00:18:20] like this is not aligned
[00:18:21] with my spirit.
[00:18:22] I think that speaks
[00:18:23] to people's willingness
[00:18:24] to believe people are good though.
[00:18:25] Yeah, because people are good.
[00:18:27] Right?
[00:18:27] No.
[00:18:28] Not everyone, but...
[00:18:29] Nobody's good?
[00:18:29] No, people are,
[00:18:30] but not everyone is good.
[00:18:31] Not if they know you.
[00:18:32] They know me.
[00:18:33] If they know...
[00:18:36] I ain't gonna lie.
[00:18:37] That shit came from left field.
[00:18:39] I ain't even expecting
[00:18:39] to walk in my life.
[00:18:43] Nah, I ain't gonna lie.
[00:18:44] Don't even do it to yourself, bro.
[00:18:45] You gotta let him do it.
[00:18:46] Let him run.
[00:18:47] I promise you.
[00:18:48] That's not a personal dig at me, bro.
[00:18:50] I promise you that.
[00:18:51] Oh my God.
[00:18:52] Leave me out of it.
[00:18:53] That was insane.
[00:18:55] You made excuses for his soul.
[00:18:57] Yeah, come through, bro.
[00:18:58] We have Kwanee.
[00:19:01] Come on, hang out.
[00:19:02] Look at yourself.
[00:19:04] Something that you said...
[00:19:06] He don't have the stool?
[00:19:07] Nah.
[00:19:08] It's a quick question.
[00:19:10] If you're making excuses
[00:19:11] for yourself in the moment,
[00:19:12] are you then still a victim
[00:19:14] or are you like a co-conspirator?
[00:19:17] I'm making excuses for this person.
[00:19:19] The nigga said I'm a Cody in the cheating.
[00:19:21] If I know
[00:19:22] and then I'm not like,
[00:19:23] you know what?
[00:19:24] Whatever.
[00:19:25] Whatever.
[00:19:25] It's cool.
[00:19:25] I'm gonna make...
[00:19:26] In my head,
[00:19:27] it's just okay,
[00:19:27] whatever.
[00:19:27] I can get past it.
[00:19:28] Am I then making an excuse for them to...
[00:19:31] Because if I say...
[00:19:33] Because it's a slippery slope.
[00:19:34] If I give you a pass now,
[00:19:36] all you're gonna do
[00:19:36] is just make sure
[00:19:37] you don't get caught again
[00:19:38] or just make sure
[00:19:39] things don't go a certain way
[00:19:41] to where it comes back.
[00:19:41] You think so?
[00:19:42] You think a person could...
[00:19:43] I mean, it's...
[00:19:44] You think it's a...
[00:19:46] Habitual?
[00:19:47] I was gonna say that,
[00:19:48] but like...
[00:19:48] You don't think somebody...
[00:19:49] A one-off?
[00:19:50] It could be one of...
[00:19:51] It could be one of two things.
[00:19:53] If it's somebody that
[00:19:54] you know that you love so much
[00:19:56] and you almost lost,
[00:19:57] you'll change your ways.
[00:19:59] That's what I was saying.
[00:20:00] But if it's somebody
[00:20:00] that you really don't give a fuck about
[00:20:02] and they found you,
[00:20:04] found out,
[00:20:04] and then you're like,
[00:20:07] is she not going?
[00:20:09] You're not leaving.
[00:20:09] Bet, I'm gonna do it again,
[00:20:11] but I'm gonna just do it.
[00:20:12] It literally turned into,
[00:20:13] oh, me find a bigger distance.
[00:20:14] Yeah, like...
[00:20:16] Oh, you saying Brooklyn?
[00:20:16] I'm gonna sat now.
[00:20:17] Because for this now,
[00:20:19] shorty hit shorty up,
[00:20:21] and then,
[00:20:21] ah, ah,
[00:20:21] now I'm gonna go to
[00:20:24] fucking Wisconsin.
[00:20:25] You don't know nobody
[00:20:26] from Wisconsin,
[00:20:26] so nothing's gonna get...
[00:20:28] It's one or the other.
[00:20:29] I'm gonna go to Clark.
[00:20:31] It's one or the other.
[00:20:32] So, yeah, are you...
[00:20:34] If you're making excuses
[00:20:35] for that person,
[00:20:36] are you then part of this
[00:20:37] victimization or
[00:20:39] whatever it is,
[00:20:40] or what do you think?
[00:20:41] It depends.
[00:20:41] Because I feel like
[00:20:42] when it's happening to you
[00:20:43] in the moment too, though,
[00:20:44] you still grieving low-key.
[00:20:46] It's like grief.
[00:20:47] You really going through denial.
[00:20:48] It's mad stages
[00:20:49] before you get to the point
[00:20:50] of like,
[00:20:51] oh, this really happened to me.
[00:20:52] So, yeah,
[00:20:52] you're making excuses.
[00:20:53] I'm not saying it's cut and dry
[00:20:55] when something happens,
[00:20:56] you gotta dip.
[00:20:57] But at a certain point,
[00:20:58] you need to think about
[00:20:59] am I happy?
[00:21:01] Anytime I'm talking about this
[00:21:02] to any of my friends,
[00:21:03] I'll be like,
[00:21:04] what do you like about this person?
[00:21:06] And I'll be like,
[00:21:06] name four things.
[00:21:08] What if they can't name 10?
[00:21:10] People,
[00:21:10] but it'd be superficial stuff.
[00:21:12] It'd be things that...
[00:21:13] That is a tough realization.
[00:21:15] When somebody asks you,
[00:21:16] what you like about this person
[00:21:18] and you stuck?
[00:21:20] You volunteering.
[00:21:21] You're just comfortable
[00:21:21] with having somebody.
[00:21:22] Because sometimes people
[00:21:23] are just comfortable.
[00:21:24] It's like,
[00:21:24] it's part of my routine.
[00:21:25] You wake up,
[00:21:26] go to the gym,
[00:21:27] argue with this nigga,
[00:21:27] go home.
[00:21:28] It's literally just like
[00:21:30] what you do.
[00:21:30] You don't even think about
[00:21:31] what's actually happening.
[00:21:33] The argument being a part
[00:21:34] of the daily routine.
[00:21:35] That's when you wake up
[00:21:36] and you're like,
[00:21:36] can we have a good day?
[00:21:37] Yes.
[00:21:38] No, no funny shit.
[00:21:39] That's crazy though.
[00:21:41] You should not be...
[00:21:43] Let's have a good day today.
[00:21:45] Yo, I got to tell you
[00:21:46] how to do this today.
[00:21:46] Yo, starting your day
[00:21:47] with a let's have a good day today
[00:21:49] is...
[00:21:49] Oh my God.
[00:21:51] Listen, listen, listen.
[00:21:53] In reading back the message,
[00:21:55] I realized how much
[00:21:56] of an asshole I was,
[00:21:57] but I didn't mean it.
[00:21:59] So...
[00:22:00] Oh, this is about to be bars.
[00:22:01] So she...
[00:22:03] I think I could...
[00:22:04] Of course you can.
[00:22:05] We know who you are.
[00:22:06] Nigga, do not delete.
[00:22:06] Don't do anything.
[00:22:08] Yeah, hold on, hold on, hold on.
[00:22:09] You just search the words?
[00:22:10] And now with this new iOS update,
[00:22:11] you can just type in the words.
[00:22:13] Yeah, all right.
[00:22:13] That's how I called him
[00:22:14] the second time.
[00:22:15] Oh, because you searched?
[00:22:16] Mm-hmm.
[00:22:17] So you searched the name
[00:22:18] or where'd you be?
[00:22:19] No, I went through keywords.
[00:22:20] So you definitely went through a song.
[00:22:22] So she...
[00:22:22] I don't want to say a word
[00:22:23] that Cheyenne hate.
[00:22:25] I did not look that word up.
[00:22:27] Pussy.
[00:22:28] Ew.
[00:22:29] Can you imagine?
[00:22:32] So no good morning,
[00:22:34] no nothing.
[00:22:35] The message just starts with
[00:22:36] wow.
[00:22:37] Whoa.
[00:22:38] Okay.
[00:22:38] Right?
[00:22:39] From another side?
[00:22:40] Yeah, from...
[00:22:40] Oh, man.
[00:22:41] I said, please don't start.
[00:22:45] Leave a negative
[00:22:46] in front of Act A's God
[00:22:47] for the new day.
[00:22:48] Listen, listen, listen.
[00:22:49] Please find a different outlet
[00:22:50] to release your frustration
[00:22:51] rather than start it with me.
[00:22:53] Right?
[00:22:54] So skim, skim, skim, skim, skim.
[00:22:56] I said, yo, respectfully,
[00:22:57] did you brush your teeth?
[00:22:58] Yo.
[00:22:59] Did you pray?
[00:23:00] Did you stretch?
[00:23:01] You antagonized this person, bro.
[00:23:02] Listen, listen.
[00:23:02] Did you pray?
[00:23:03] Did you stretch?
[00:23:04] Did you eat?
[00:23:05] Before deciding to have
[00:23:06] this conversation,
[00:23:08] just let me know.
[00:23:10] I'll ask you.
[00:23:11] Does it matter?
[00:23:12] Yes!
[00:23:13] Because...
[00:23:14] Why is the negative
[00:23:15] the first thing on your mind?
[00:23:16] Come on, bro.
[00:23:17] I'm just being...
[00:23:19] Imagine waking up.
[00:23:20] No, no, not even waking up.
[00:23:22] It's 816.
[00:23:23] I'm already at work.
[00:23:25] Probably mid through my shift.
[00:23:27] You know?
[00:23:29] And you wake...
[00:23:30] You wake up and just...
[00:23:32] Wow.
[00:23:32] You knew what the wow was about?
[00:23:33] No!
[00:23:34] So how could...
[00:23:35] What if it was a wow?
[00:23:36] Because why was it...
[00:23:36] When was it in the morning?
[00:23:37] I just got the best pedicure of my life.
[00:23:39] At 816?
[00:23:40] She just woke up, bro.
[00:23:42] It was at 10 o'clock.
[00:23:43] Wow.
[00:23:43] I just had an amazing...
[00:23:43] And you know...
[00:23:44] Let me tell you...
[00:23:44] I had an amazing yoga session.
[00:23:46] I don't know about y'all,
[00:23:48] but when women start talking like
[00:23:49] chat GPT
[00:23:50] and start putting their periods
[00:23:51] in a text...
[00:23:53] It's a toot.
[00:23:54] It's a toot.
[00:23:55] It's a toot.
[00:23:55] It's a toot.
[00:23:56] Why?
[00:23:57] Because I ain't gonna lie, my nigga.
[00:23:58] I love you to death, shorty,
[00:23:59] but you illiterate.
[00:24:02] Don't try not killing the BB now.
[00:24:04] Nigga, cut this shit.
[00:24:05] What do you say?
[00:24:06] Don't try not killing the BB now.
[00:24:07] Now you know words?
[00:24:08] Now you know words?
[00:24:09] Now you know words?
[00:24:10] When she start texting
[00:24:11] and you know she put the...
[00:24:13] She ran it through Grammarly.
[00:24:16] Like, you didn't do XA.
[00:24:17] I like this nigga.
[00:24:18] What are we doing here?
[00:24:19] Like, come on, son.
[00:24:20] Like, please don't talk to me
[00:24:22] like no secretary.
[00:24:24] Stop, bro.
[00:24:25] Stop.
[00:24:25] Stop.
[00:24:26] So...
[00:24:26] And I was right.
[00:24:27] I was right.
[00:24:28] Of course you was right.
[00:24:29] You was right, but I'm saying...
[00:24:30] You know your person
[00:24:31] and they just start off
[00:24:32] on some bullshit.
[00:24:33] So I agree with that.
[00:24:34] That, yo, please,
[00:24:35] let's have a good day today.
[00:24:37] It's seven days out of the week.
[00:24:38] Let me get at least
[00:24:39] three out of the four.
[00:24:40] But you also don't want to be
[00:24:41] in a situation where you have
[00:24:41] to tell your partner that
[00:24:43] I want to start the day
[00:24:44] by letting you know
[00:24:45] we should have a good day.
[00:24:46] I'm not going to lie, bro.
[00:24:46] I can't volunteer for that.
[00:24:47] Y'all should have more good days
[00:24:48] than bad days.
[00:24:49] Don't start your bullshit.
[00:24:49] And that's what you know
[00:24:50] you got to do.
[00:24:50] I can't volunteer for that, bro.
[00:24:51] Every day...
[00:24:52] Like, even when we talk
[00:24:53] about friends and shit like that,
[00:24:53] that's like, my nigga,
[00:24:54] every day can be bad, bro.
[00:24:55] Yo.
[00:24:56] Yo.
[00:24:56] I can't volunteer
[00:24:57] to have a conversation
[00:24:58] about something every time
[00:24:59] that's negative.
[00:24:59] My nigga, leave me alone.
[00:25:00] I ain't going to hold you.
[00:25:01] I'm never vented to Kojo again.
[00:25:04] I'm mid-vented.
[00:25:05] The nigga just ghost me, bro.
[00:25:06] Nah.
[00:25:08] See?
[00:25:08] That nigga said yo.
[00:25:10] He did it twice.
[00:25:11] See?
[00:25:11] Same day?
[00:25:12] Twice.
[00:25:13] No, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:25:13] Same topic.
[00:25:15] Same topic, but twice.
[00:25:17] So I'm like,
[00:25:17] he don't want to hear it.
[00:25:18] That's not true.
[00:25:19] I got to the phone!
[00:25:20] No, no, no.
[00:25:21] You see?
[00:25:21] It's funny you say that
[00:25:22] because in the same breath,
[00:25:23] we will get on the phone
[00:25:24] and talk about it for hours.
[00:25:25] But that's what I said.
[00:25:27] That's the last time.
[00:25:29] Never talking to Kojo.
[00:25:30] Really?
[00:25:30] About anything, bro.
[00:25:32] I care.
[00:25:32] I'm going to just send you
[00:25:33] the invite to any funeral
[00:25:34] I got to attend.
[00:25:36] Like, yo.
[00:25:37] Dang.
[00:25:37] That got dark.
[00:25:38] That got dark.
[00:25:40] Somebody just went down
[00:25:41] the friendship tears.
[00:25:43] Never that.
[00:25:44] Never that.
[00:25:44] No, but it's even like
[00:25:45] with the can we have a good day?
[00:25:47] It's like you'll sit there
[00:25:48] and realize
[00:25:49] we was only good
[00:25:50] the first three months.
[00:25:52] We a year in
[00:25:53] and we've been beefing
[00:25:54] for seven months.
[00:25:54] Why still?
[00:25:55] What?
[00:25:56] Seven months?
[00:25:57] A lot of,
[00:25:58] if you think about,
[00:25:58] when you think about
[00:25:59] the honeymoon phase.
[00:25:59] You still got two months to go.
[00:26:01] It could recover.
[00:26:01] It could turn around.
[00:26:02] You said you started off three.
[00:26:04] It's seven.
[00:26:04] People be too caught up
[00:26:05] in the honeymoon stage too.
[00:26:06] That's how you end up volunteering.
[00:26:08] Because you're chasing that high
[00:26:09] of like what it was like
[00:26:10] when y'all first met
[00:26:11] or how good it was.
[00:26:12] And then you're like,
[00:26:13] all right,
[00:26:13] is this growing pains
[00:26:14] or is this just not for me?
[00:26:17] Son.
[00:26:19] Dane triggered.
[00:26:21] Nah, that's it.
[00:26:23] You triggering Dane over there.
[00:26:24] No, but after that,
[00:26:25] yo bro,
[00:26:25] you want to think
[00:26:26] after that three,
[00:26:27] other three months,
[00:26:27] it's like,
[00:26:27] yo, my nigga,
[00:26:28] what am I doing here?
[00:26:29] It depends what the beef is though.
[00:26:31] It was,
[00:26:32] nothing is resolved?
[00:26:33] Yeah, for seven months.
[00:26:34] There's another problem.
[00:26:35] There's another problem.
[00:26:35] It's like,
[00:26:36] yo, my nigga,
[00:26:36] come on.
[00:26:37] But you know,
[00:26:38] people aren't good
[00:26:38] at resolving conflict.
[00:26:40] Conflict resolution
[00:26:41] and relationships
[00:26:42] are really lacking
[00:26:43] because people got
[00:26:44] different styles
[00:26:45] on how they handle shit.
[00:26:46] A lot of people
[00:26:46] don't hold themselves
[00:26:47] accountable for shit.
[00:26:48] So that's what I'm going to do.
[00:26:49] Oh, women.
[00:26:50] Sorry, Cheyenne.
[00:26:52] You said women?
[00:26:53] Yeah.
[00:26:54] Getting a woman
[00:26:54] to apologize
[00:26:55] is like pulling teeth.
[00:26:56] And I got my teeth pulled.
[00:26:57] So I think I could pull teeth.
[00:26:59] Cheyenne,
[00:26:59] do you apologize for me?
[00:27:00] Fuck no.
[00:27:02] Answer that for you.
[00:27:03] You know, Cheyenne,
[00:27:04] what's your apology bag like?
[00:27:05] You hungry?
[00:27:06] Like when you're
[00:27:07] No, I'm sorry.
[00:27:08] When you're the perpetrator
[00:27:09] of making somebody a victim
[00:27:10] and you're trying to deny them.
[00:27:12] Cheyenne,
[00:27:13] I'm sorry.
[00:27:14] Damn, nigga.
[00:27:14] I'm sorry.
[00:27:15] Fuck.
[00:27:16] Are we talking about me now?
[00:27:18] Yes.
[00:27:18] Oh, yeah.
[00:27:19] I'm sorry.
[00:27:20] That's it?
[00:27:20] What was you before?
[00:27:21] I feel like that one
[00:27:22] was a little bit better.
[00:27:23] I wasn't an apologize.
[00:27:24] I'd be like,
[00:27:25] man.
[00:27:25] Why were you like that?
[00:27:26] Why were you like that?
[00:27:27] I was emotionally unavailable.
[00:27:29] So I was just like,
[00:27:30] oh, this is silly.
[00:27:31] So if somebody was holding you,
[00:27:32] trying to hold you accountable,
[00:27:33] you just couldn't connect back then
[00:27:35] with like your wrongdoing and
[00:27:37] I didn't think I was wrong.
[00:27:39] Ever?
[00:27:39] No.
[00:27:41] I'm not going to lie.
[00:27:42] How'd you get there?
[00:27:43] 98% of the population.
[00:27:44] How'd you get to this point
[00:27:44] where you're like,
[00:27:45] shit.
[00:27:47] Sorry.
[00:27:48] Wait, I put on.
[00:27:49] Oh.
[00:27:50] Kwanee said no.
[00:27:52] Don't let her off the hook.
[00:27:53] Whatever.
[00:27:54] So did you ever
[00:27:55] know he was doing fuck shit?
[00:27:57] Yeah.
[00:27:58] No, no, yeah.
[00:27:58] And then said,
[00:27:59] I'm still not wrong?
[00:28:00] I'm not going to lie.
[00:28:01] I used to do things like.
[00:28:05] Talk about it.
[00:28:06] Can you just be as honest as possible?
[00:28:08] I am.
[00:28:09] I'm watching my words.
[00:28:10] I asked a specific question.
[00:28:11] Yeah.
[00:28:14] I used to just move like
[00:28:15] I'm not married.
[00:28:16] So I'm single and it's fair game.
[00:28:18] I'm going to just do what I want.
[00:28:19] Wow.
[00:28:20] You wasn't getting married
[00:28:21] with that mentality either.
[00:28:22] I mean, yeah,
[00:28:23] but I wasn't thinking about that.
[00:28:24] I was in my early 20s.
[00:28:26] I didn't care.
[00:28:26] Young, wild, and free.
[00:28:27] Like I didn't think like,
[00:28:28] oh yeah, this is my husband.
[00:28:30] I was like,
[00:28:30] I always looked at relationships
[00:28:32] like there was a time limit.
[00:28:34] It's finite.
[00:28:34] So I'm like,
[00:28:35] this is not going to be
[00:28:36] up for everything.
[00:28:37] That's tough shit.
[00:28:38] So I was like,
[00:28:38] I enjoy it.
[00:28:39] Like I enjoy you.
[00:28:39] This is fun.
[00:28:40] Like cool, but I didn't ever.
[00:28:42] I always just think about
[00:28:43] like my exit strategy.
[00:28:44] So I was always thinking
[00:28:45] about like how this ends
[00:28:46] versus like.
[00:28:47] She's in her bag right now.
[00:28:48] I ain't going to hold you.
[00:28:49] I ain't going to lie.
[00:28:49] You a sick nigga, bro.
[00:28:50] I'm not like that anymore.
[00:28:51] LA, you a bro?
[00:28:52] I was like that too.
[00:28:54] Why are you so pessimistic?
[00:28:56] Every relationship ends.
[00:28:57] Either we break up
[00:28:58] or someone dies.
[00:28:59] So I just used to always
[00:29:00] look at it like
[00:29:01] we either going to break up
[00:29:01] or one of us is going to die.
[00:29:03] That is some dark shit.
[00:29:05] Yeah, I'm always like.
[00:29:06] Y'all niggas is shooting
[00:29:08] niggas or something?
[00:29:08] 26 talking about.
[00:29:09] You got smoke?
[00:29:10] Damn.
[00:29:11] You used 26 second like this?
[00:29:12] No, no, no.
[00:29:12] I wasn't doing that 26.
[00:29:13] That was like 24.
[00:29:15] Nixon maybe something.
[00:29:16] That is tough though.
[00:29:18] Because we met, yeah.
[00:29:19] So by the time we met
[00:29:20] I was like a little more normal.
[00:29:23] Now I'm like way better.
[00:29:25] Yo.
[00:29:26] Damn.
[00:29:28] What's up?
[00:29:29] What did y'all stay for
[00:29:31] being in a victim state?
[00:29:33] What was it bad?
[00:29:34] Like situation brought
[00:29:35] some benefits to you
[00:29:36] but you were still
[00:29:37] in a victim state.
[00:29:38] It was stability.
[00:29:39] It was a stable
[00:29:41] victimized
[00:29:42] place.
[00:29:43] Yo.
[00:29:44] The fact that
[00:29:44] yeah I think
[00:29:45] I think women get a lot
[00:29:46] of flack for it
[00:29:46] but it's like just knowing
[00:29:47] that I wasn't going
[00:29:48] to be alone
[00:29:49] is enough to keep
[00:29:50] like
[00:29:52] who want to start over bro?
[00:29:53] The streets is nasty right?
[00:29:54] I think that's what it is.
[00:29:55] The starting over shit.
[00:29:55] Yo who wants to start over bro?
[00:29:56] The starting over?
[00:29:57] The slayer bro.
[00:29:58] I'd rather deal with
[00:29:59] the op I know
[00:29:59] than a new one
[00:30:00] I got to deal with
[00:30:01] another fucking
[00:30:02] another floor.
[00:30:03] That's not a fucking over.
[00:30:03] I don't think I have that fear
[00:30:04] of the starting over thing
[00:30:05] but I do have
[00:30:06] I probably have more
[00:30:07] of the fear of
[00:30:08] damn I might be alone
[00:30:09] for like
[00:30:11] another three
[00:30:12] four years?
[00:30:13] Yeah.
[00:30:13] You know what I'm saying?
[00:30:14] Especially you know your character
[00:30:15] you know how long it takes you
[00:30:15] to really like
[00:30:16] connect you selective
[00:30:17] about who you
[00:30:18] it led into your life.
[00:30:19] you have something
[00:30:20] that you think
[00:30:21] is worth it
[00:30:23] you might
[00:30:23] turn a blind eye
[00:30:24] just so you don't have
[00:30:25] to go through
[00:30:26] another three
[00:30:27] four years of being alone
[00:30:28] and you got to
[00:30:29] you got to go to weddings
[00:30:30] and maybe showers
[00:30:31] and you just like
[00:30:32] you playing all these
[00:30:33] things in your mind
[00:30:34] and you got things
[00:30:36] in motion
[00:30:37] and then
[00:30:38] this is gone
[00:30:39] cooked.
[00:30:41] that's why
[00:30:42] I'm saying that
[00:30:43] it's the best way
[00:30:44] to think about things
[00:30:45] but I think
[00:30:45] naturally as humans
[00:30:46] you just
[00:30:49] I don't want to be lonely
[00:30:50] right now.
[00:30:50] Or is this
[00:30:51] am I
[00:30:52] I don't know
[00:30:53] this may be kind of
[00:30:54] gaslighting yourself
[00:30:55] I'd be like yo
[00:30:56] is this an 80-20 thing
[00:30:57] like am I really
[00:30:58] about to dip for this
[00:30:59] and then realize
[00:31:00] out there is worse
[00:31:01] and I can't get back
[00:31:01] to this.
[00:31:02] Oh it's always worse
[00:31:02] out there though.
[00:31:04] What was your
[00:31:05] where your positivity went?
[00:31:06] What happened?
[00:31:07] Why didn't Mr. Positive
[00:31:08] just zipped out of here?
[00:31:09] Nah.
[00:31:10] For me it was trauma so.
[00:31:12] Oh just like
[00:31:13] a trauma bonding thing?
[00:31:14] Yeah.
[00:31:14] No because
[00:31:14] I just feel like
[00:31:15] yeah I can never see you
[00:31:16] trauma bonding with anybody.
[00:31:17] Well it wasn't trauma bonding
[00:31:18] it was about to get a little dark
[00:31:19] but
[00:31:20] Oh no.
[00:31:20] Oh no.
[00:31:21] Like
[00:31:21] You seen my apartment?
[00:31:24] Like around the time
[00:31:25] when my mother passed away
[00:31:26] all my relationships
[00:31:27] like placeholders
[00:31:28] so I was just like
[00:31:29] eh this is fine
[00:31:30] like this is distracting.
[00:31:31] Yeah so it was just like
[00:31:32] a placeholder
[00:31:33] and then you just got used to it
[00:31:34] and instead of like
[00:31:35] actually grieving
[00:31:36] I was just like
[00:31:37] I had something else to do
[00:31:38] and like focus on
[00:31:39] while I could still be like
[00:31:40] a little bit detached from it
[00:31:41] but it was like
[00:31:42] a thing that was like
[00:31:43] oh yeah this is like
[00:31:44] my little boyfriend
[00:31:45] in school.
[00:31:45] Yeah but you weren't
[00:31:45] mature enough either
[00:31:46] at that time too.
[00:31:48] For sure it wasn't
[00:31:48] which is why
[00:31:49] that was like
[00:31:50] my placeholder
[00:31:50] versus like
[00:31:51] going to therapy.
[00:31:52] Right.
[00:31:53] But
[00:31:53] yeah that's tough.
[00:31:55] Which I didn't do
[00:31:55] till what
[00:31:57] 10 years into my grief
[00:31:58] so it was like
[00:31:59] then you look back
[00:32:00] and you're like
[00:32:00] oh that's what this was.
[00:32:02] Was anybody
[00:32:03] your victim?
[00:32:05] I mean
[00:32:05] apparently.
[00:32:06] So the
[00:32:08] victimizer to victim
[00:32:09] pipeline
[00:32:10] was the
[00:32:11] route I followed.
[00:32:12] So I was like
[00:32:13] the victimizer
[00:32:13] then grief
[00:32:15] then victim.
[00:32:17] Yeah.
[00:32:18] Oh shit.
[00:32:20] Wait so
[00:32:20] so it went in the reverse
[00:32:21] for me.
[00:32:22] I wasn't like
[00:32:22] Wow.
[00:32:23] Yeah no.
[00:32:23] So you wasn't shit before?
[00:32:25] No.
[00:32:26] And then grief.
[00:32:26] So wait
[00:32:27] is that why he cheated?
[00:32:28] Because you wasn't shit?
[00:32:29] No by the time
[00:32:29] we got together
[00:32:30] I was like
[00:32:32] docile.
[00:32:32] I was
[00:32:32] that was
[00:32:34] land in the chair.
[00:32:34] I'm about to say
[00:32:35] what that you know.
[00:32:36] No.
[00:32:37] It's your fault.
[00:32:39] That was a tough
[00:32:40] motivation.
[00:32:40] No it wasn't
[00:32:41] a cheat back.
[00:32:42] It wasn't a cheat back.
[00:32:43] Did you get your look back?
[00:32:44] Do I know why I was?
[00:32:45] He cheated?
[00:32:46] Shorty was fire.
[00:32:47] Nah.
[00:32:48] Not even.
[00:32:49] Ah.
[00:32:49] Get out of his coming.
[00:32:50] Set your ass up.
[00:32:52] No I would have
[00:32:54] given it to her.
[00:32:55] It wasn't that.
[00:32:56] It was just
[00:32:56] it was too hot in the pants.
[00:32:58] Too fucky fucky?
[00:32:59] Yeah too fucky fucky.
[00:33:02] All right.
[00:33:03] He just wanted to slam dance
[00:33:04] Kwani.
[00:33:05] Slam dance?
[00:33:06] That is quote of the year.
[00:33:08] We putting that on the shirt.
[00:33:10] Oh my gosh.
[00:33:11] We should throw an R&B party
[00:33:12] and quote a slam dance.
[00:33:14] Maybe not though.
[00:33:16] Was I ever
[00:33:18] was I was a villain.
[00:33:19] Yeah.
[00:33:19] Were you a villain to somebody?
[00:33:20] Yeah.
[00:33:22] A lot.
[00:33:22] I mean I was
[00:33:23] I was
[00:33:23] I mean most of
[00:33:24] most of the
[00:33:25] not most recent.
[00:33:26] That was
[00:33:27] That was
[00:33:28] That was
[00:33:28] This nigga quiet.
[00:33:30] The nigga
[00:33:31] The nigga
[00:33:31] Now I'm
[00:33:32] Mike No More
[00:33:32] He's
[00:33:32] We caught
[00:33:35] It's in the back
[00:33:36] Way V in it
[00:33:37] is in his back
[00:33:38] It's in the back
[00:33:39] of the truck
[00:33:40] bro
[00:33:40] Come out
[00:33:41] We caught
[00:33:41] Nah my older
[00:33:43] My older days
[00:33:43] I definitely
[00:33:44] was a villain
[00:33:44] I talk about it
[00:33:45] on the spot
[00:33:45] so many times
[00:33:46] bro like
[00:33:47] Me a younger day
[00:33:48] Yeah
[00:33:48] I did apologize
[00:33:50] Yeah we tried to say that
[00:33:51] Actually I did apologize
[00:33:52] I apologized to somebody
[00:33:53] that I wasn't like
[00:33:54] The nicest to?
[00:33:55] Yeah
[00:33:55] Was he receptive to it?
[00:33:57] Yeah
[00:33:57] It was one of those things
[00:33:58] where years later
[00:34:00] we had a conversation
[00:34:01] and he was just like
[00:34:02] yeah I really didn't
[00:34:03] appreciate X, Y, Z
[00:34:04] You know why
[00:34:05] it took so long
[00:34:06] for us to do that?
[00:34:07] I ain't gonna front
[00:34:07] That was
[00:34:08] It took a lot out of me
[00:34:09] to be
[00:34:10] I apologize
[00:34:11] No no no no
[00:34:11] For us to say
[00:34:12] yo I don't appreciate
[00:34:13] your way you treating me
[00:34:14] I feel like I got
[00:34:17] one of those
[00:34:17] like in the tuck
[00:34:18] right now
[00:34:19] just holding on
[00:34:20] but
[00:34:20] In the moment
[00:34:21] it's like an old thing
[00:34:24] Like I didn't appreciate
[00:34:25] the way you treated me
[00:34:26] I'm lying
[00:34:27] I got two of them shits
[00:34:28] in the tuck
[00:34:31] Two of them shits
[00:34:31] in the tuck
[00:34:32] Why haven't you done it yet?
[00:34:33] I don't
[00:34:34] Yo bro
[00:34:34] Honestly one
[00:34:36] Nah nah
[00:34:37] Nah nah
[00:34:37] Not even that
[00:34:38] It's the person
[00:34:38] even gonna care
[00:34:39] You know what I'm saying?
[00:34:40] Cause it's kinda like
[00:34:41] yo you do all of that
[00:34:42] and they be like
[00:34:43] But what if it's for you though?
[00:34:44] Just to get it off your chest
[00:34:45] Then I don't need to say it
[00:34:46] If it's for me
[00:34:47] I don't need it
[00:34:47] I find a difference
[00:34:47] Yeah
[00:34:49] I'm preaching out here
[00:34:51] I journal that shit
[00:34:52] Yeah
[00:34:52] I journal that shit
[00:34:53] Like yo I don't
[00:34:54] I don't really appreciate
[00:34:55] like
[00:34:57] You taking my kindness
[00:34:58] for extreme weakness
[00:35:00] right now
[00:35:00] and I'm not dumb
[00:35:01] You know what I'm saying?
[00:35:02] I may not show it
[00:35:04] but I'm not dumb
[00:35:05] I'm hip
[00:35:06] I'm letting you go through
[00:35:07] your life cycle
[00:35:09] but like
[00:35:10] don't think you gonna
[00:35:11] pull me for a loop bro
[00:35:12] Like I'm gonna
[00:35:13] pull a wool over my ass
[00:35:14] I'm a little witty bro
[00:35:15] You know?
[00:35:16] So
[00:35:17] that one
[00:35:18] and then y'all mans
[00:35:19] that one might be crazy
[00:35:21] That's cranny mans
[00:35:22] but here's also
[00:35:24] here's also
[00:35:25] the second reason
[00:35:26] right?
[00:35:29] I guess the
[00:35:31] macho-ness
[00:35:32] that's a vulnerable thing
[00:35:34] yo I don't appreciate
[00:35:35] the way you've been
[00:35:36] treating me
[00:35:37] that's a very vulnerable state
[00:35:39] where you let somebody know
[00:35:41] like yo
[00:35:42] That made me feel a way
[00:35:43] yo you broke my armor
[00:35:44] like you cut through
[00:35:45] and I'm not showing it
[00:35:47] but you cutting through
[00:35:48] and
[00:35:49] to hold that up
[00:35:50] while dealing with the like
[00:35:51] the lashes of like
[00:35:52] the mistreatment of you
[00:35:56] that takes a lot
[00:35:56] for me that takes a lot
[00:35:57] because then I gotta let you know
[00:35:59] that you got through to me
[00:35:59] whether you intended to or not
[00:36:01] and sometimes I don't know
[00:36:02] if I want that person
[00:36:03] to have that over me
[00:36:04] because I don't know
[00:36:05] how genuine they are
[00:36:07] you know?
[00:36:07] So if they
[00:36:08] if they're sincere about it
[00:36:09] they may feel something
[00:36:10] like damn I'm fucking up
[00:36:11] but if they not
[00:36:12] then it's like
[00:36:13] another one
[00:36:14] like
[00:36:15] another one under the belt
[00:36:16] so nah
[00:36:17] I can't
[00:36:18] I can't let that be
[00:36:19] the Trojan horse
[00:36:20] Kwon's got something to say?
[00:36:24] We gotta get another mic
[00:36:25] for the next production
[00:36:27] So do y'all
[00:36:27] do y'all expect people
[00:36:29] to know how to treat you?
[00:36:31] Or do you
[00:36:32] No no
[00:36:32] if a situation happens
[00:36:33] Yes
[00:36:34] No but
[00:36:35] there is a decency
[00:36:37] that we all have
[00:36:38] as humans
[00:36:38] that kind of
[00:36:40] sets a base level
[00:36:41] so anything
[00:36:41] beneath that
[00:36:42] is pure foolishness
[00:36:44] like you know
[00:36:45] what you
[00:36:46] what you don't want
[00:36:47] so that's the bare minimum
[00:36:49] you knowing
[00:36:50] what you don't want
[00:36:51] like I don't want
[00:36:52] nobody to do this
[00:36:53] I don't want
[00:36:53] nobody to do this
[00:36:54] I don't want
[00:36:54] nobody to
[00:36:56] if you gotta
[00:36:57] pick between
[00:36:57] your ex or me
[00:36:58] go with your ex
[00:36:59] don't even put me
[00:37:00] through that motion
[00:37:01] bare minimum
[00:37:02] surface shit
[00:37:03] you know how
[00:37:04] you wanna be treated
[00:37:04] the learning
[00:37:06] is the
[00:37:06] okay
[00:37:07] how you respond
[00:37:09] to things
[00:37:09] so I don't expect
[00:37:11] anybody to
[00:37:12] know how to
[00:37:13] love me
[00:37:14] but
[00:37:14] know how to
[00:37:15] love yourself
[00:37:16] to know
[00:37:16] what not to do
[00:37:17] to other people
[00:37:18] what's gonna hurt
[00:37:18] you know what's
[00:37:19] gonna hurt somebody
[00:37:20] you know if I do this
[00:37:21] you gonna feel
[00:37:22] some type of way
[00:37:22] about this
[00:37:23] or if I do
[00:37:24] or if I did this
[00:37:26] if it's not okay
[00:37:27] for you
[00:37:27] don't do it for me
[00:37:29] so when I can sense
[00:37:30] you on that type of time
[00:37:31] you doing a lot of shit
[00:37:32] that you wouldn't be okay with
[00:37:35] gotta go
[00:37:36] now Kodra
[00:37:37] you said yes
[00:37:38] you expect somebody
[00:37:39] to know how to treat you
[00:37:40] yeah
[00:37:40] but he explained why
[00:37:42] once you hit that
[00:37:43] base level
[00:37:44] of just decency
[00:37:46] y'all building on top of that
[00:37:47] yeah
[00:37:47] anything that goes
[00:37:49] under that
[00:37:49] is
[00:37:50] it's either deliberate
[00:37:51] or it's a lack of awareness
[00:37:55] it's neglectful
[00:37:56] it's all those things
[00:37:57] so
[00:37:57] so in the right world
[00:37:58] this makes sense
[00:37:59] but we live in a real world
[00:38:00] where not everybody agrees
[00:38:02] with that
[00:38:02] or not everybody
[00:38:03] has the same basis
[00:38:05] then they're not for me bro
[00:38:06] cause then that's
[00:38:07] that goes to my
[00:38:08] my goal
[00:38:09] to my compatibility thing
[00:38:11] if you're not even
[00:38:12] a decent human being
[00:38:13] we're not compatible
[00:38:14] for friendship
[00:38:15] for
[00:38:16] for romantic
[00:38:17] you
[00:38:18] you just not
[00:38:19] a decent person
[00:38:20] like I
[00:38:20] in the real world
[00:38:21] I know they're not
[00:38:22] that many good people
[00:38:24] I
[00:38:25] I interact with
[00:38:26] all types of
[00:38:27] walk of life
[00:38:28] every day
[00:38:29] everybody
[00:38:30] got somewhere to go
[00:38:32] got something to do
[00:38:33] and they're thinking
[00:38:34] about themselves
[00:38:35] and you just benefit
[00:38:36] from their self thinking
[00:38:37] so
[00:38:39] the people who
[00:38:40] are out there
[00:38:41] who thinks about
[00:38:41] the next person
[00:38:42] and want to help
[00:38:43] the next person
[00:38:43] those are fewer
[00:38:45] in between
[00:38:45] cool
[00:38:46] but if you just
[00:38:47] a flat out
[00:38:48] bad person
[00:38:49] and I find that out
[00:38:50] that's when I walk away
[00:38:51] now if I stay
[00:38:52] that's when I'm the volunteer
[00:38:54] cause I've been
[00:38:55] I've been around
[00:38:55] some bad people
[00:38:56] and it was like
[00:38:57] they weren't bad to me
[00:38:58] until it was my turn
[00:38:59] for them to be bad to me
[00:39:00] but that's the thing
[00:39:01] though
[00:39:02] facts
[00:39:02] and that's
[00:39:03] I don't
[00:39:04] that's volunteering
[00:39:05] facts
[00:39:05] is it
[00:39:06] yes
[00:39:07] how
[00:39:07] yes
[00:39:08] let me tell you why
[00:39:09] if you stay
[00:39:10] if you stay
[00:39:10] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you stay
[00:39:11] if you have hope
[00:39:12] that's my thing right now
[00:39:13] no no no no
[00:39:13] for example like for me
[00:39:14] I only like to be around kind men right
[00:39:16] but kind period
[00:39:17] so it means like
[00:39:18] you're not just kind to me
[00:39:19] cause you're interested in me
[00:39:20] or cause I'm pretty
[00:39:21] let's look at shit
[00:39:22] let me guess
[00:39:24] but no cause men like that
[00:39:26] like when you have no value to them
[00:39:29] they're gonna treat you crazy
[00:39:30] so a lot of women are like
[00:39:31] oh you know
[00:39:32] I like my men who are not friendly
[00:39:33] I don't like men like that
[00:39:34] if you're gonna be rude to women
[00:39:35] that you are not like
[00:39:36] physically involved with
[00:39:37] I'm cool on you
[00:39:38] because that means like
[00:39:39] the minute
[00:39:40] that value
[00:39:40] you don't see it anymore
[00:39:41] you're gonna start treating me crazy
[00:39:42] I volunteered for that
[00:39:43] cause I know
[00:39:44] you have a track record of like
[00:39:45] not necessarily being the kindest guy
[00:39:47] if you're not
[00:39:47] if you don't deem this person worthy
[00:39:49] no
[00:39:50] Kwani come back
[00:39:51] cause you look respectful
[00:39:51] that's good respectful
[00:39:52] how do you explain that to women
[00:39:55] what do you mean
[00:39:56] as a man who
[00:39:58] well
[00:39:58] if a man who is
[00:40:00] person of one kind
[00:40:02] I mean
[00:40:03] I guess
[00:40:03] but if a man who doesn't want to
[00:40:05] who doesn't act that way
[00:40:07] towards them
[00:40:07] I like
[00:40:07] they're not like
[00:40:09] but the woman wants them to be that way
[00:40:11] how do you
[00:40:12] I see where Kwani is
[00:40:13] actually
[00:40:13] cause it's
[00:40:15] cause it's literally like
[00:40:16] someone would blame your brother
[00:40:16] so don't be in everybody's face
[00:40:18] don't be
[00:40:18] but it's like you're not
[00:40:19] yeah
[00:40:20] cause then that's
[00:40:21] then you get home
[00:40:22] and oh
[00:40:24] you chillin
[00:40:24] and you get her a drink
[00:40:26] oh is that how you get
[00:40:27] everybody else a drink
[00:40:28] or
[00:40:29] oh
[00:40:29] oh you just nice to all of them
[00:40:30] not even that
[00:40:31] what we doin' here
[00:40:32] there's like
[00:40:34] you uh
[00:40:35] you uh
[00:40:35] damn I don't wanna tell this story
[00:40:37] see but I don't operate like that
[00:40:38] so I don't even know how you explain that
[00:40:39] for a girl
[00:40:41] oh we just opening doors for everybody
[00:40:44] see that's a joke
[00:40:45] I took that as a joke
[00:40:46] but we be a serious
[00:40:47] hold on now
[00:40:48] now we just opening doors for everybody
[00:40:49] so now
[00:40:50] so now
[00:40:51] so now
[00:40:52] that's insecurity
[00:40:53] yeah I don't even
[00:40:54] I mean
[00:40:55] everybody's situation is different
[00:40:56] but like
[00:40:57] I'm not explaining that to somebody
[00:40:58] like
[00:40:59] what are you saying to me
[00:41:00] like
[00:41:00] cause now
[00:41:01] we don't even morally align
[00:41:02] you're trying to tell me to be
[00:41:03] not a good
[00:41:04] the person that I am
[00:41:05] like
[00:41:06] that's like
[00:41:06] that's like a man telling me
[00:41:08] you better not be on that podcast
[00:41:09] with
[00:41:09] with the niggas
[00:41:10] with the niggas
[00:41:11] and that's why
[00:41:12] yo bro
[00:41:12] remember what I said
[00:41:14] when I was like
[00:41:14] yo when we gotta think
[00:41:16] on a woman that we would add
[00:41:17] we gotta make sure
[00:41:19] she does not
[00:41:19] deal with the
[00:41:21] which one of them
[00:41:22] she fucking
[00:41:22] remember that's
[00:41:23] one of the main things
[00:41:24] I said yo
[00:41:24] we can't just bring
[00:41:25] any girl here
[00:41:26] any woman here
[00:41:27] to sit on the par
[00:41:28] because she is going to
[00:41:30] like
[00:41:31] any par that comes off
[00:41:33] a little too much
[00:41:34] or she jokey jokey
[00:41:35] or
[00:41:35] she gotta answer to her man
[00:41:36] I don't even deal
[00:41:37] with men like that
[00:41:39] that's a hard
[00:41:40] that's a hard line
[00:41:42] is it
[00:41:42] for her
[00:41:43] cause I have
[00:41:44] well yeah
[00:41:44] for her
[00:41:45] you have a lot of male friends
[00:41:46] like you have a really
[00:41:46] my friends
[00:41:47] it's like
[00:41:47] you can't tell me
[00:41:48] you can't hang out
[00:41:49] with coach yo
[00:41:49] what are you talking about
[00:41:51] y'all have a lot of good friends
[00:41:53] y'all feel any way
[00:41:54] about your women
[00:41:55] have a lot of male friends
[00:41:55] not at all
[00:41:58] oh shit
[00:41:59] the heavy breathing
[00:42:00] hold on
[00:42:01] I ain't gonna front
[00:42:02] I ain't gonna
[00:42:03] insecurity
[00:42:05] no no
[00:42:05] I gotta meet
[00:42:06] it gotta be LA
[00:42:07] you gotta call it what it is
[00:42:08] nah I gotta know
[00:42:09] the history of the friendship
[00:42:10] I gotta meet niggas though
[00:42:10] I gotta meet niggas though
[00:42:11] I don't even gotta meet the niggas
[00:42:13] I gotta catch everybody's energy
[00:42:14] a little bit though
[00:42:14] nah I gotta know
[00:42:15] I gotta catch things's energy
[00:42:16] a little bit though
[00:42:17] they could be
[00:42:17] no no no no
[00:42:18] they gotta
[00:42:19] they got
[00:42:20] no I have to know
[00:42:21] the history of the friendship
[00:42:22] cause certain male friends
[00:42:23] are only friends
[00:42:24] because they couldn't
[00:42:25] go any further
[00:42:26] the niggas weighing
[00:42:26] the niggas weighing it
[00:42:27] I'm trying
[00:42:28] so
[00:42:28] is anything wrong with that
[00:42:30] what
[00:42:31] I'm being legit
[00:42:33] you waiting for me and my girl to bring up so you can bust her out
[00:42:35] we got an issue
[00:42:37] we got a discrepant
[00:42:39] someone has to look at you
[00:42:40] no no no no
[00:42:41] so if you can't see
[00:42:42] you can't see
[00:42:43] if your woman set a boundary between that
[00:42:46] and
[00:42:47] my nigga
[00:42:48] when she get into a vulnerable moment
[00:42:49] what's gonna happen
[00:42:50] why is she getting into a vulnerable moment
[00:42:52] why do you think that the minute
[00:42:53] the birth plan
[00:42:53] shut that positive shit up
[00:42:56] we live in the real world right
[00:42:58] yeah
[00:42:59] now
[00:42:59] why do you hear this bro
[00:43:01] why do you hear this
[00:43:03] hold up
[00:43:03] hold up
[00:43:04] thank you for listening
[00:43:05] that is Jamaican man
[00:43:05] because these two are listening
[00:43:06] I'm saying
[00:43:07] I got as much shit as valid
[00:43:08] I'm saying
[00:43:09] yeah because look
[00:43:09] because look
[00:43:11] that feeling
[00:43:11] for that gentleman was there
[00:43:12] that may be a feeling
[00:43:14] you never ever ever know
[00:43:16] because a separation was created
[00:43:19] back whenever their friendship developed
[00:43:20] you will never know
[00:43:22] if the nigga wanted to fuck your girl or not
[00:43:24] unless he come out and tell you
[00:43:26] that's why I said
[00:43:27] I want to know the history
[00:43:28] you will never know that
[00:43:29] but if
[00:43:29] no no no
[00:43:30] so if Cheyenne
[00:43:32] if Cheyenne say
[00:43:34] I can't even use it
[00:43:35] yeah
[00:43:35] if Cheyenne say
[00:43:37] Kwani's
[00:43:37] Kwani's one of my best friends
[00:43:39] and I say yo
[00:43:39] has Kwani ever shot his shot
[00:43:41] prior to y'all friendship developing
[00:43:43] she can say yeah
[00:43:45] but I nipped that in the butt
[00:43:46] I mean
[00:43:47] okay thank you for telling me that
[00:43:49] okay
[00:43:50] but I don't trust Kwani
[00:43:51] as far as I can see him
[00:43:52] to be fair
[00:43:52] I wouldn't ever engage
[00:43:53] in a best friendship
[00:43:54] with somebody
[00:43:54] would you ask your girl
[00:43:56] about every nigga like that
[00:43:57] or just
[00:43:57] no
[00:43:58] alright so
[00:43:58] I'm not scared
[00:44:01] had her male best friend
[00:44:03] what the fuck is going on
[00:44:05] thank you
[00:44:06] thank you
[00:44:06] thank you
[00:44:07] thank you
[00:44:08] thank you
[00:44:08] thank you
[00:44:09] thank you
[00:44:11] keep holding it for a little while
[00:44:13] what is going on
[00:44:14] the sip of wine
[00:44:15] okay
[00:44:15] so
[00:44:16] her best friend
[00:44:18] right
[00:44:20] male
[00:44:21] male
[00:44:22] very small
[00:44:22] yeah
[00:44:23] so like
[00:44:24] I guess in the third
[00:44:26] fourth grade
[00:44:26] fifth grade
[00:44:27] listen
[00:44:29] listen
[00:44:29] listen
[00:44:29] listen
[00:44:30] no
[00:44:30] can I finish
[00:44:31] you listen
[00:44:32] you listen
[00:44:33] to Kwani
[00:44:34] you listen
[00:44:34] to Kwani
[00:44:35] I mean
[00:44:35] you listen
[00:44:36] to Kojo
[00:44:37] his mom
[00:44:39] deadass tried to
[00:44:40] arrange that
[00:44:41] okay
[00:44:42] so
[00:44:42] on some cute
[00:44:43] fourth girl
[00:44:44] fourth grade shit
[00:44:45] appreciate you bro
[00:44:45] when it got to high school
[00:44:47] towards the ending stage
[00:44:49] of high school
[00:44:50] that's when he actually
[00:44:51] tried to see
[00:44:52] right
[00:44:53] so cool
[00:44:54] when
[00:44:56] so
[00:44:57] I think
[00:44:58] prom was coming up
[00:44:59] so it was like
[00:45:00] alright
[00:45:01] you know
[00:45:01] whatever
[00:45:09] she's like
[00:45:09] she's like
[00:45:10] whoa
[00:45:10] we've been friends
[00:45:11] for all this time
[00:45:11] no that's not happening
[00:45:12] but in his mind
[00:45:14] it's like
[00:45:14] oh he don't look at you
[00:45:15] just as a friend
[00:45:16] like I can look at Cheyenne
[00:45:17] and just as a friend
[00:45:18] Cheyenne would make me
[00:45:20] jump off this roof
[00:45:20] so I would never date her
[00:45:22] I love that
[00:45:23] right
[00:45:23] yeah
[00:45:24] you're a sick motherfucker
[00:45:26] but at the same time
[00:45:28] you
[00:45:28] you're a closest
[00:45:29] friend
[00:45:30] who you tell
[00:45:31] everything to
[00:45:32] don't look at you
[00:45:33] as just that
[00:45:34] right
[00:45:35] so boom
[00:45:37] when I asked her
[00:45:38] about it
[00:45:38] she left that part out
[00:45:41] but my man
[00:45:42] Ruben
[00:45:43] who was the one
[00:45:44] who put me
[00:45:45] Ruben what up
[00:45:46] he tried to put me on
[00:45:47] I said yo bro
[00:45:48] what you know
[00:45:49] about her male best friend
[00:45:50] now her and Ruben
[00:45:51] like this
[00:45:52] so she told the whole
[00:45:53] prom story
[00:45:54] and all of that
[00:45:54] to Ruben
[00:45:55] so she left that out
[00:45:56] cause she knew
[00:45:57] how I would
[00:45:58] there you go
[00:45:59] so not all the male
[00:46:01] best friends
[00:46:01] is that a red flag
[00:46:03] leaving that little piece out
[00:46:04] well according to women
[00:46:07] what's the saying
[00:46:09] omitting
[00:46:10] omitting
[00:46:10] what is
[00:46:11] omitting information
[00:46:12] is still lying
[00:46:13] so yeah she lied
[00:46:15] liar
[00:46:15] that was a lie
[00:46:17] it's the truth
[00:46:18] she's agreeing with men
[00:46:20] on the podcast
[00:46:21] you got it
[00:46:21] cut this out
[00:46:22] hold on
[00:46:23] I feel like I've chosen
[00:46:23] Cheyenne, Khadija
[00:46:25] Ashley Mitchell
[00:46:25] as like my
[00:46:26] my women
[00:46:27] like
[00:46:28] best friends
[00:46:28] Naya
[00:46:29] like all of them
[00:46:29] like for specific reasons
[00:46:31] you know what's tough though
[00:46:33] when your
[00:46:33] when your women friends
[00:46:34] are pretty
[00:46:36] and when your women friends
[00:46:37] are prettier
[00:46:38] than your girl
[00:46:39] that's tough
[00:46:40] cause it's hard
[00:46:41] but who's the judge
[00:46:41] of who's prettier
[00:46:42] women
[00:46:43] they know
[00:46:44] that's within themselves
[00:46:45] no
[00:46:45] that's not
[00:46:46] that's not fair
[00:46:49] thank you
[00:46:50] yo bro
[00:46:50] my nigga
[00:46:51] thank you bro
[00:46:51] I would never think that though
[00:46:53] or they know
[00:46:54] their best
[00:46:55] their
[00:46:57] assortment
[00:46:57] of women friends
[00:46:58] ain't chump
[00:46:59] it's a hard night
[00:47:01] wait
[00:47:02] their friends
[00:47:02] or your friends
[00:47:03] our friends
[00:47:04] when they look at
[00:47:06] when they look at
[00:47:07] our
[00:47:07] friends
[00:47:08] of women
[00:47:09] like when we go outside
[00:47:10] it's all
[00:47:11] y'all some baddies
[00:47:13] come on
[00:47:14] like one of my
[00:47:14] alright
[00:47:15] one of my
[00:47:16] closest best friends
[00:47:17] is Imani Madison
[00:47:18] shout out to Imani man
[00:47:20] that's my guy
[00:47:21] exactly
[00:47:22] you think a woman
[00:47:24] that ain't your best friend
[00:47:26] they going through
[00:47:27] they haven't
[00:47:28] they have to
[00:47:28] they have to
[00:47:30] figure out
[00:47:31] they figure out
[00:47:32] the same
[00:47:32] thing
[00:47:33] remember when I told y'all
[00:47:35] um
[00:47:35] the argument I got over
[00:47:37] cause of Cheyenne
[00:47:38] I'll get in it
[00:47:39] remember when we all
[00:47:41] went to the uh
[00:47:41] the brunch spot
[00:47:42] and I tagged everybody
[00:47:44] but I didn't tag Cheyenne
[00:47:45] oh so you hiding her
[00:47:47] what's your relationship
[00:47:48] with her
[00:47:48] oh I'm gonna make it
[00:47:49] wait what brunch was this
[00:47:51] this was uh
[00:47:52] City's Hour's brunch
[00:47:53] but technically
[00:47:54] cause she said
[00:47:55] who you went with
[00:47:56] I went with y'all
[00:47:58] we met Cheyenne there
[00:47:59] I didn't go with Cheyenne
[00:48:00] and I didn't go with
[00:48:02] boy
[00:48:03] I looked so pretty that day
[00:48:05] I did
[00:48:05] I remember when I wore
[00:48:06] and everything
[00:48:07] so so
[00:48:08] when she was like
[00:48:09] who you went with
[00:48:09] I said
[00:48:10] I went with
[00:48:11] Preach, Kojo, Kwanny, Don
[00:48:14] and Cyrus
[00:48:15] how she ended up here
[00:48:16] and Cyrus
[00:48:16] then I see on Twitter
[00:48:18] yo niggas be lying
[00:48:19] about every little thing
[00:48:20] I'm like
[00:48:21] what the fuck
[00:48:22] did I do
[00:48:23] so I'm like
[00:48:24] that might have been
[00:48:24] a threat of
[00:48:25] you having a pretty
[00:48:26] best friend
[00:48:26] or friend
[00:48:27] in general
[00:48:28] that was around you
[00:48:29] but did she not know
[00:48:30] who I was
[00:48:30] she probably didn't know
[00:48:31] who I was though right
[00:48:31] no she's heard your name
[00:48:33] before
[00:48:33] but the fact that
[00:48:34] I didn't say
[00:48:35] I also said
[00:48:36] I didn't go with
[00:48:37] the person Cheyenne went with
[00:48:39] so niggas sneaking around
[00:48:40] exactly
[00:48:40] so why
[00:48:41] if it wasn't anything
[00:48:43] to keep away from me
[00:48:45] you would have just
[00:48:45] included her
[00:48:46] well
[00:48:47] imagine me saying
[00:48:48] to her
[00:48:49] what Cheyenne said
[00:48:50] to us
[00:48:50] well if you were to
[00:48:51] ask a clarified question
[00:48:52] I'd have give you
[00:48:53] a clarified answer
[00:48:55] I'd have turned into
[00:48:56] a Billy Goat too
[00:49:01] so
[00:49:01] so
[00:49:02] it gets tricky
[00:49:04] when your women friends
[00:49:05] are like
[00:49:07] hmm
[00:49:09] attractive
[00:49:09] that or
[00:49:10] quote unquote
[00:49:11] they look like
[00:49:12] your type
[00:49:14] wow
[00:49:15] that's so stupid
[00:49:16] yeah
[00:49:17] no it's not
[00:49:18] because
[00:49:18] it's not just
[00:49:19] like I said
[00:49:21] Cheyenne may be pretty
[00:49:22] but her personality
[00:49:23] we not compatible
[00:49:25] so
[00:49:25] I say all the time
[00:49:37] gorgeous
[00:49:38] her personality
[00:49:40] I would not
[00:49:41] last a second
[00:49:43] being her man
[00:49:45] that's her problem
[00:49:46] because now I'm on my Cheyenne shit
[00:49:49] that's your problem bro
[00:49:51] because
[00:49:53] you're not gonna
[00:49:55] hold on
[00:49:55] you're not gonna force
[00:49:56] an issue
[00:49:57] that's forcing
[00:49:58] that's forcing
[00:49:59] an issue
[00:49:59] if I'm telling you
[00:50:01] we're just friends
[00:50:01] and you're trying to force
[00:50:03] oh
[00:50:03] but that look like
[00:50:05] somebody you would date
[00:50:06] that's tough
[00:50:07] yeah you
[00:50:08] you're trying to find
[00:50:09] something
[00:50:10] I'm not here for you
[00:50:11] to find anything
[00:50:12] that's tough
[00:50:13] no
[00:50:13] mm-mm
[00:50:14] I'm sorry
[00:50:15] that don't
[00:50:15] that don't work
[00:50:16] I'm praying for any
[00:50:17] of your future situations
[00:50:18] I can't do it
[00:50:19] at this big age bro
[00:50:20] oh
[00:50:22] you look like
[00:50:22] you talking to this
[00:50:23] my nigga
[00:50:23] shut the fuck up
[00:50:25] because then you think
[00:50:25] it'll be extreme
[00:50:25] like damn
[00:50:25] I gotta cut my friends off
[00:50:28] you ever done that
[00:50:29] cut a woman off
[00:50:30] to save your relationship
[00:50:31] I always say
[00:50:32] I met Cheyenne
[00:50:32] and Naya on the same day
[00:50:34] at the same time
[00:50:35] and they have not
[00:50:36] left my life
[00:50:37] since February 2017
[00:50:39] that same year
[00:50:40] they were at my
[00:50:40] birthday dinner
[00:50:41] I'd known them
[00:50:42] for four months
[00:50:43] at that time
[00:50:44] my real friends
[00:50:45] and to this day
[00:50:47] I had to cut a woman off
[00:50:48] these are my dogs
[00:50:49] I'm not cutting them off
[00:50:50] you had to cut
[00:50:50] a woman friend off
[00:50:51] mm-hmm
[00:50:52] I would only cut a friend off
[00:50:53] if like the lines
[00:50:54] were a little blurred
[00:50:55] and I'm like
[00:50:55] I don't respect
[00:50:56] I'm gonna
[00:50:57] did you cut that friend
[00:50:57] off regrettedly
[00:50:58] like did you regret
[00:50:59] it doing that
[00:51:00] LA
[00:51:00] yeah
[00:51:01] damn
[00:51:03] you wanna get it back
[00:51:04] Suley I think it's already
[00:51:06] she's pissed
[00:51:07] she was very pissed
[00:51:08] you wanna apologize
[00:51:09] live on camera
[00:51:10] he's not
[00:51:11] only girl
[00:51:12] yeah
[00:51:13] I had to tell him
[00:51:13] he protected
[00:51:14] he tried to protect home
[00:51:15] and then
[00:51:16] that home ain't even here
[00:51:17] no more
[00:51:17] right
[00:51:18] the home gone
[00:51:19] he said home
[00:51:19] alright Joe
[00:51:22] we fucking got it
[00:51:24] he would've had all
[00:51:25] he told us to take out
[00:51:27] he want to
[00:51:28] he told us
[00:51:29] I don't want to
[00:51:30] pay back
[00:51:30] I ain't gonna break
[00:51:32] home's gone
[00:51:32] but this is staying
[00:51:33] no no no
[00:51:34] they're not together
[00:51:36] like nigga we heard
[00:51:37] this whole time
[00:51:37] but to be fair
[00:51:38] with the friends
[00:51:39] being pretty thing
[00:51:40] we live in a society
[00:51:41] that everybody
[00:51:42] for the most part
[00:51:43] treats people who
[00:51:44] are decently good looking
[00:51:45] at the same level
[00:51:46] y'all would consider
[00:51:47] yourselves all good looking
[00:51:48] we are dashing
[00:51:49] friends
[00:51:49] exactly
[00:51:50] so it's just like
[00:51:50] it's not gonna do it
[00:51:51] I'm a liar
[00:51:51] I mean from my perspective
[00:51:52] people gonna do what they want
[00:51:54] if his female friends
[00:51:55] are pretty or not
[00:51:56] if y'all are being sneaky
[00:51:57] or not
[00:51:57] that's
[00:51:58] I'm not gonna know
[00:51:59] until I do
[00:51:59] and then when I do
[00:52:00] it's just click
[00:52:01] it's tough
[00:52:01] like I'm not staying here
[00:52:02] policing your friendships
[00:52:03] that's weird
[00:52:04] at this point
[00:52:05] in y'all life
[00:52:05] y'all working anything out
[00:52:08] nah
[00:52:08] it depends
[00:52:09] Rucento
[00:52:09] speaking of being a big
[00:52:10] volunteer like
[00:52:11] yo y'all working shit out
[00:52:12] it depends on what it is
[00:52:14] everybody does depend on what it is
[00:52:17] 30
[00:52:18] the last part of the year
[00:52:19] you try to get me to go
[00:52:20] 30
[00:52:21] um
[00:52:22] you gotta go bishop style
[00:52:23] on this one
[00:52:23] I ain't gonna lie
[00:52:24] shout out to bitch
[00:52:25] Ruc
[00:52:26] am I working things out
[00:52:28] what are we working out though
[00:52:29] yeah let's start with that
[00:52:30] are we having a difference
[00:52:31] in opinion on something
[00:52:32] are we like
[00:52:33] having a
[00:52:34] they fucked around
[00:52:34] they fucked around
[00:52:35] but they didn't go
[00:52:36] they didn't go all the way
[00:52:37] but they fucked around
[00:52:37] no anything that you can't do
[00:52:39] in front of me
[00:52:39] publicly freely
[00:52:40] you're done
[00:52:40] wait what's to work out
[00:52:42] they didn't go all the way
[00:52:43] like
[00:52:44] what you mean
[00:52:45] they tried to put the tip in
[00:52:46] oh
[00:52:47] they was texting
[00:52:49] they DM
[00:52:50] they DM
[00:52:51] I think we're gonna end this podcast
[00:52:56] welcome to the pod G
[00:52:58] nigga with a hustler
[00:52:59] I keep forgetting that
[00:53:01] oh my god
[00:53:04] I completely forgot about that
[00:53:06] nigga's not on a 42 mark that bad
[00:53:07] what you saying though
[00:53:10] alright
[00:53:10] am I working
[00:53:11] I think
[00:53:11] you know what's crazy
[00:53:12] the DM and
[00:53:13] the working thing out
[00:53:15] I'm not even talking about that
[00:53:17] on that type shit
[00:53:18] I think that's when you become a volunteer
[00:53:20] cause you're
[00:53:21] you're volunteering
[00:53:23] for
[00:53:24] you're signing up
[00:53:25] for the better of this
[00:53:26] or the worse
[00:53:27] like your
[00:53:28] marriage
[00:53:29] marriage is volunteering
[00:53:30] yeah
[00:53:30] oh my god
[00:53:31] no
[00:53:32] no no
[00:53:33] no
[00:53:34] yeah
[00:53:35] yeah for real
[00:53:36] I'm signing up
[00:53:38] this shit can go either way
[00:53:41] in this scenario
[00:53:42] I don't wanna get in deep
[00:53:43] in marriage
[00:53:43] cause that's a whole
[00:53:44] different debate
[00:53:45] but in this scenario
[00:53:46] where the working things out
[00:53:49] and I'm on the side of
[00:53:50] yo
[00:53:50] I don't like
[00:53:51] this already
[00:53:52] but
[00:53:53] I'm hoping that
[00:53:55] whatever you're saying to me
[00:53:56] is honest
[00:53:58] I'm asking all the questions
[00:53:59] I'm
[00:54:00] I'm
[00:54:00] I'm the
[00:54:01] question asker
[00:54:02] like
[00:54:02] yo
[00:54:03] what is this about
[00:54:04] are you done with this
[00:54:06] are you through with this
[00:54:07] are you over this
[00:54:08] what are you
[00:54:09] are you telling me
[00:54:11] all the right things
[00:54:12] I'm volunteering
[00:54:14] for
[00:54:14] this is either the truth
[00:54:16] exactly
[00:54:18] that
[00:54:18] that for me
[00:54:20] do I have that in me anymore
[00:54:22] probably not
[00:54:23] I think the last one
[00:54:24] was the last one
[00:54:25] the last one
[00:54:26] was definitely the last one
[00:54:28] I just
[00:54:28] I'm okay with being wrong
[00:54:30] I used to
[00:54:32] not be okay with that
[00:54:33] like damn
[00:54:34] like
[00:54:34] what if I gave up on this person
[00:54:36] too soon
[00:54:36] or gave up on this opportunity
[00:54:37] maybe I'm not trying
[00:54:38] maybe I'm not fighting
[00:54:39] maybe I'm
[00:54:40] you know
[00:54:41] how many chances
[00:54:42] I got left
[00:54:43] to find genuine
[00:54:44] sometimes you gotta protect yourself
[00:54:45] now
[00:54:47] listen
[00:54:48] I've accepted that
[00:54:49] if it's not in the cards for me
[00:54:51] then I
[00:54:52] listen
[00:54:53] I'll make sure
[00:54:54] I live the lavish life of
[00:54:55] you know
[00:54:56] when the women be like
[00:54:57] oh I'm in my auntie era
[00:54:59] uncle LA bro
[00:55:01] I got all y'all kids gifts
[00:55:03] to haul it up
[00:55:04] they come to my crib
[00:55:05] for the weekend
[00:55:05] yo can we go to LA crib
[00:55:07] bring them over to me
[00:55:08] y'all
[00:55:09] they got snacks
[00:55:11] do I walk dogs
[00:55:12] I watch dogs
[00:55:13] you ever seen me with a dog
[00:55:14] she said
[00:55:14] she said
[00:55:15] you gotta watch Leo
[00:55:16] those are my children
[00:55:17] facts
[00:55:17] what about you
[00:55:18] rest of y'all
[00:55:19] no
[00:55:20] you working out
[00:55:21] Quanny
[00:55:22] I'm gonna send you a picture
[00:55:23] right now Sean
[00:55:23] you working out
[00:55:24] depends on what it is
[00:55:25] Quanny's definitely working
[00:55:27] in I've never seen
[00:55:27] Quanny like this before
[00:55:28] I never
[00:55:29] yeah Quanny not letting this go
[00:55:30] I feel like
[00:55:32] I feel like he's
[00:55:32] I feel like he's strict around there
[00:55:33] he's establishing his footing man
[00:55:34] now Quanny's strict
[00:55:35] I know he's strict
[00:55:36] but he also
[00:55:37] he's a
[00:55:38] he gives me like
[00:55:39] I don't play that shit
[00:55:40] he sauce too
[00:55:41] but that's why he
[00:55:42] so y'all give him the benefit
[00:55:43] of the doubt
[00:55:44] he's soft
[00:55:45] but I'm strict and mean
[00:55:46] yeah
[00:55:47] yeah
[00:55:47] but then the body's all
[00:55:48] the way Sean acts
[00:55:50] people really think Sean is so serious
[00:55:52] this nigga don't take nothing
[00:55:53] and that's the thing
[00:55:54] that's so
[00:55:54] that's why I'm like
[00:55:55] sometimes I be like
[00:55:56] maybe I'm wrong
[00:55:59] I'm not a serious person
[00:56:00] I'm not super mean either
[00:56:01] I can be
[00:56:03] do y'all
[00:56:03] do y'all don't reserve the right
[00:56:04] to be like
[00:56:05] well I'm bad
[00:56:06] but I'm wrong a lot
[00:56:08] yeah
[00:56:08] do y'all not want
[00:56:09] the person to give you breath
[00:56:10] why you can't just talk bro
[00:56:12] you here
[00:56:13] yeah dude
[00:56:14] do you not want the person
[00:56:15] to give you breath
[00:56:15] what do you say
[00:56:15] you're wrong
[00:56:16] I'll say it all
[00:56:17] so then
[00:56:20] well I guess this is more
[00:56:21] of a question for
[00:56:22] like I said if you
[00:56:23] cause I hear a lot of like
[00:56:24] one and dones
[00:56:25] at this point
[00:56:26] nah I'm not one and done
[00:56:27] I mean probably now
[00:56:28] what I got
[00:56:29] yeah
[00:56:30] yeah probably
[00:56:31] so y'all not ever
[00:56:33] expect to be
[00:56:34] rowdy with anything
[00:56:35] in life
[00:56:35] I've been wrong already
[00:56:36] so then do you not
[00:56:37] expect someone
[00:56:38] to give you some
[00:56:39] grace words
[00:56:39] if you like
[00:56:40] not want it done
[00:56:40] with you
[00:56:41] as you are
[00:56:41] with everybody else
[00:56:43] yeah you seem
[00:56:44] want it done
[00:56:44] on a black surface
[00:56:45] first of all
[00:56:46] no Lashon is strict
[00:56:47] across the board
[00:56:48] you too
[00:56:49] no we're talking about
[00:56:50] like doing too much
[00:56:51] like flirting
[00:56:51] DMing
[00:56:52] my thing is
[00:56:52] if that's a hard line
[00:56:53] for me
[00:56:54] and you do it
[00:56:55] that's why I'm
[00:56:55] want it done
[00:56:56] cause that was established
[00:56:57] like yo these are
[00:56:57] my hard lines
[00:56:58] like if that wasn't
[00:56:59] a hard line
[00:56:59] that was established
[00:57:00] and it happened
[00:57:01] and maybe
[00:57:02] something got lost
[00:57:03] in communication
[00:57:03] that's a different situation
[00:57:05] but I make it very clear
[00:57:06] like what I'm not
[00:57:07] going for
[00:57:08] and then it's kind of like
[00:57:10] you did it anyway
[00:57:11] so you just want to test
[00:57:12] to see how serious I was
[00:57:13] I take that as like
[00:57:14] oh that's your boundary
[00:57:15] alright let's see
[00:57:16] let's see how serious
[00:57:17] you are about it
[00:57:19] like and I don't
[00:57:20] I don't like that
[00:57:20] too much
[00:57:21] DMing
[00:57:21] DMing
[00:57:22] DMing
[00:57:23] DMing
[00:57:23] Dane asked
[00:57:24] cause I don't know
[00:57:24] why Dane is doing this
[00:57:26] a listener question
[00:57:27] DMing
[00:57:28] are you okay
[00:57:29] with not getting married
[00:57:30] or settling down
[00:57:31] yes I am
[00:57:32] my life
[00:57:34] my life right now
[00:57:34] the way it's going
[00:57:35] I think
[00:57:36] uh
[00:57:37] if it
[00:57:38] like I said
[00:57:38] if it doesn't happen
[00:57:39] it doesn't happen
[00:57:40] what are you willing
[00:57:41] to work out
[00:57:42] um
[00:57:44] an individual
[00:57:45] going through
[00:57:46] their own motion
[00:57:46] in life
[00:57:48] like so I could be
[00:57:49] so I
[00:57:50] yeah
[00:57:50] if their life is life
[00:57:51] and my life is not
[00:57:52] I'm not
[00:57:53] corny enough
[00:57:54] to be like
[00:57:54] yo you gotta
[00:57:55] I don't
[00:57:55] I don't want to receive that
[00:57:57] for how long
[00:57:58] until they figure it out
[00:57:59] if they're doing the work
[00:58:00] to figure it out
[00:58:01] I'll say
[00:58:02] Lawrence and Issa Bubz
[00:58:03] so
[00:58:03] but see
[00:58:05] okay
[00:58:06] let's use that
[00:58:06] as an example
[00:58:07] she jumped the shit
[00:58:09] too early
[00:58:09] only to end
[00:58:10] yes
[00:58:11] absolutely
[00:58:11] let me tell you why
[00:58:12] you ended up
[00:58:13] you
[00:58:13] you left early
[00:58:15] and ended up
[00:58:16] with a nigga
[00:58:16] with a kid
[00:58:17] the same nigga
[00:58:18] who didn't have a kid
[00:58:19] prior to you dating him
[00:58:20] but he probably knew
[00:58:21] that character development
[00:58:22] he might have still been
[00:58:22] on that couch
[00:58:23] if they never went
[00:58:23] through what they went through
[00:58:25] maybe
[00:58:26] maybe
[00:58:26] but at the same time
[00:58:29] I can't imagine
[00:58:30] see
[00:58:31] that means you
[00:58:32] give it
[00:58:32] Easter credit
[00:58:33] for Lawrence's
[00:58:33] ascension
[00:58:34] I'm not saying that
[00:58:35] I said maybe
[00:58:35] he needed some
[00:58:36] destruction
[00:58:36] he was comfortable
[00:58:38] he was comfortable
[00:58:38] he had a crib
[00:58:39] he had his girl
[00:58:39] he didn't feel
[00:58:40] like he had to go hard
[00:58:40] but he was on his own
[00:58:41] he was still developing
[00:58:42] his what
[00:58:43] his YY app
[00:58:44] or whatever
[00:58:44] that he never ended up doing
[00:58:45] because he was like
[00:58:46] that's actually dumb
[00:58:47] what he started doing
[00:58:47] marketing
[00:58:48] he started working
[00:58:49] in tech
[00:58:50] but he said
[00:58:50] he realized
[00:58:51] he did not want
[00:58:51] to be a developer
[00:58:52] okay
[00:58:52] but he still
[00:58:53] okay
[00:58:54] so for me
[00:58:56] I would have
[00:58:56] if
[00:58:57] if
[00:58:58] if the woman
[00:58:59] I'm dating
[00:59:00] is quote unquote
[00:59:01] in her Lawrence era
[00:59:03] that's crazy
[00:59:04] right
[00:59:06] and first of all
[00:59:07] you're real
[00:59:07] so if a woman
[00:59:08] told you like
[00:59:09] your birthday
[00:59:10] let's just
[00:59:10] get a
[00:59:11] like a
[00:59:11] little
[00:59:12] take out
[00:59:13] from the Chinese
[00:59:13] spa
[00:59:13] and chill
[00:59:14] oh you
[00:59:14] you don't want
[00:59:15] to hear how
[00:59:15] I settled
[00:59:16] on my birthday
[00:59:17] I already know
[00:59:18] about O
[00:59:18] yeah
[00:59:18] so
[00:59:19] you can't
[00:59:20] but you care
[00:59:20] about your birthday
[00:59:21] I do
[00:59:22] exactly
[00:59:22] so that wouldn't
[00:59:23] really feel good
[00:59:24] to you
[00:59:24] it wouldn't
[00:59:25] but I would
[00:59:25] take the L
[00:59:26] on my birthday
[00:59:26] if they are
[00:59:27] in that stage
[00:59:28] that's what
[00:59:29] I'm volunteering
[00:59:29] for
[00:59:30] okay
[00:59:30] you know
[00:59:31] I'm volunteering
[00:59:32] to take
[00:59:33] these couple
[00:59:33] of L's
[00:59:34] while you
[00:59:34] figure your
[00:59:35] shit out
[00:59:35] for the betterment
[00:59:36] of the group
[00:59:36] yeah
[00:59:37] I will do
[00:59:40] that
[00:59:40] that
[00:59:41] so to answer
[00:59:42] that question
[00:59:42] Dane
[00:59:42] that is what
[00:59:43] I am willing
[00:59:44] to do
[00:59:45] it's not worth
[00:59:46] is nothing
[00:59:47] worth working
[00:59:48] out
[00:59:48] no there's mad
[00:59:49] things worth
[00:59:50] working out
[00:59:50] um
[00:59:52] it's just
[00:59:53] is the person
[00:59:54] dead ass
[00:59:55] working on it
[00:59:57] you know
[00:59:57] I'm saying
[00:59:57] like
[00:59:58] you can't
[00:59:59] you can't
[01:00:00] tell me
[01:00:01] you working
[01:00:01] on something
[01:00:02] to hold me
[01:00:02] and then I
[01:00:03] realized
[01:00:04] yo bro
[01:00:05] you just
[01:00:05] buying time
[01:00:06] there's a
[01:00:06] difference
[01:00:07] between
[01:00:07] being patient
[01:00:08] with somebody
[01:00:09] and somebody
[01:00:09] stalling
[01:00:10] like
[01:00:11] you stalling
[01:00:12] my nigga
[01:00:13] don't milk
[01:00:13] the clock
[01:00:14] you know
[01:00:14] what I'm saying
[01:00:15] like we all
[01:00:15] bullshitted at work
[01:00:16] we all abused
[01:00:17] the clock
[01:00:18] you know
[01:00:18] what I'm saying
[01:00:18] this extra
[01:00:19] thirty dollars
[01:00:21] I'ma
[01:00:22] I'ma
[01:00:22] my lunch break
[01:00:23] thirty minutes
[01:00:24] I'ma take an hour
[01:00:25] who's looking
[01:00:25] I may
[01:00:26] clock in a little early
[01:00:28] clock out a little late
[01:00:30] who's looking
[01:00:30] and then eventually
[01:00:31] HR comes
[01:00:32] hey you know
[01:00:33] I've been seeing a pattern
[01:00:34] Cheyenne comes
[01:00:35] Cheyenne comes
[01:00:36] and like
[01:00:37] you know
[01:00:37] I see a pattern here
[01:00:40] so once I see this pattern
[01:00:41] and alright
[01:00:42] now I talk to you about it
[01:00:44] you get a verbal
[01:00:45] you know
[01:00:46] then you get it written
[01:00:48] I got a clipping
[01:00:50] termination eh
[01:00:50] nigga playing shorty on a pip
[01:00:54] termination tongue
[01:00:54] got to
[01:00:55] you got to
[01:00:56] but I'm willing
[01:00:57] to work it out
[01:00:58] I'm not just firing
[01:00:58] you off rip
[01:01:00] if you tell me
[01:01:01] you working on this
[01:01:03] I'ma give you the grace
[01:01:04] to work on it
[01:01:05] but the grace
[01:01:06] don't come with violating
[01:01:08] yeah
[01:01:08] yeah like
[01:01:09] be considerate
[01:01:10] wow
[01:01:11] I agree with the man
[01:01:12] you're saying
[01:01:12] I need you to
[01:01:13] can I ask him more
[01:01:14] specifically
[01:01:15] yeah
[01:01:15] yes you can
[01:01:16] I like how
[01:01:16] Cheyenne changed us
[01:01:17] already
[01:01:18] so
[01:01:20] uh
[01:01:23] violating
[01:01:23] right
[01:01:24] you just be a will
[01:01:25] it
[01:01:25] be a choice
[01:01:25] yeah
[01:01:26] that doesn't necessarily
[01:01:27] have to be a bad
[01:01:28] no not at all
[01:01:29] necessarily have to make it a connotation
[01:01:30] right
[01:01:31] so like
[01:01:32] it is
[01:01:32] it's 40 great years
[01:01:34] with someone
[01:01:35] and y'all have kids
[01:01:36] and grandkids
[01:01:38] when you own your house
[01:01:39] and whatever
[01:01:40] other kids come with that
[01:01:41] is that worth
[01:01:42] like 10 bad years
[01:01:44] is that worth
[01:01:44] like
[01:01:45] the grief
[01:01:46] damn 10 bad years
[01:01:47] 10 bad years
[01:01:48] straight
[01:01:48] is it 10 straight
[01:01:49] just collectively
[01:01:50] no no
[01:01:51] I mean I've said this
[01:01:52] on the pod
[01:01:53] yeah as long as it's
[01:01:53] more good days
[01:01:54] than bad
[01:01:54] yeah I've been vocal
[01:01:55] on the pod that
[01:01:56] like
[01:01:58] like
[01:01:59] how do you decide that
[01:02:00] cause
[01:02:01] what
[01:02:02] what are you doing
[01:02:03] what does the work
[01:02:04] look like
[01:02:05] like
[01:02:05] alright so
[01:02:06] if Shorty
[01:02:06] unemployed
[01:02:07] right
[01:02:08] and she
[01:02:09] unemployed
[01:02:09] for a year
[01:02:10] and a half
[01:02:11] but
[01:02:12] she's
[01:02:13] asked
[01:02:13] everybody
[01:02:14] she knows
[01:02:15] for a job
[01:02:16] she's
[01:02:17] remade
[01:02:17] her resume
[01:02:18] 30 million
[01:02:19] times
[01:02:19] she's
[01:02:20] interviewed
[01:02:21] and
[01:02:22] and I
[01:02:23] understand
[01:02:23] the market
[01:02:24] I'm not gonna be like
[01:02:25] yo you're a bum
[01:02:26] you're trying
[01:02:27] you're working on it
[01:02:28] you know what I'm saying
[01:02:29] what if she gets like
[01:02:30] me
[01:02:31] then shit
[01:02:32] see that's
[01:02:33] that's different though
[01:02:36] alright so
[01:02:37] I volunteered
[01:02:38] to be a punching bag
[01:02:39] for a while
[01:02:40] until the bag burst
[01:02:41] hold on
[01:02:42] I don't
[01:02:43] I don't think you volunteered
[01:02:44] for it though
[01:02:45] not physically
[01:02:45] cause that's domestic violence
[01:02:47] I don't think you volunteered
[01:02:48] for that exactly though
[01:02:49] right
[01:02:49] nah so
[01:02:50] so okay
[01:02:51] alright boom
[01:02:52] so I can give another example
[01:02:54] I dated somebody
[01:02:55] who lost their grandmother
[01:02:58] I volunteered
[01:02:59] to go through that
[01:02:59] process
[01:03:00] that grieving process
[01:03:01] I know what that look like
[01:03:02] I know
[01:03:03] I'm the closest in proximity
[01:03:05] so I'ma get the wrath
[01:03:07] there's some days
[01:03:08] where that wrath
[01:03:09] that shit
[01:03:10] alright
[01:03:11] ease up
[01:03:12] that one hurt
[01:03:13] you know what I'm saying
[01:03:13] you tripping right now
[01:03:14] but at the same time
[01:03:16] I knew this wasn't gonna be like
[01:03:17] a two year
[01:03:19] three year thing
[01:03:20] where
[01:03:20] you know
[01:03:21] I mean
[01:03:21] a two month
[01:03:22] three month thing
[01:03:23] where it's like
[01:03:23] I
[01:03:23] you know
[01:03:25] after the funeral
[01:03:26] that's when life really hit
[01:03:27] now
[01:03:28] everybody's gone
[01:03:29] and you're there
[01:03:30] all the time
[01:03:30] and
[01:03:32] the relationship
[01:03:33] is gonna take a hit
[01:03:34] you know what I'm saying
[01:03:35] because it's tough
[01:03:36] it's tough
[01:03:37] because you said
[01:03:38] you volunteered for that
[01:03:39] in a relationship
[01:03:40] with somebody
[01:03:41] who is dealing
[01:03:41] with grief
[01:03:42] is there any other
[01:03:43] way to
[01:03:44] you can leave bro
[01:03:45] well I wouldn't say
[01:03:46] you volunteered for that
[01:03:47] no you know bro
[01:03:48] you telling me that
[01:03:49] your partner
[01:03:49] can lose somebody
[01:03:50] you know you don't
[01:03:51] you telling me that
[01:03:52] you're part of
[01:03:52] can lose somebody
[01:03:52] in a realistic
[01:03:55] you don't have to go
[01:03:56] through
[01:03:56] yes bro
[01:03:57] yes
[01:03:59] it's fucked up
[01:04:00] but yes
[01:04:01] two losses in one
[01:04:02] is crazy
[01:04:02] yes bro
[01:04:03] because sometimes
[01:04:04] that's really fucking wild
[01:04:05] you gotta also understand
[01:04:07] wow
[01:04:07] that
[01:04:09] not everybody know
[01:04:10] what they signing up for
[01:04:11] so
[01:04:11] so what if
[01:04:13] I don't handle
[01:04:13] death well
[01:04:15] and I
[01:04:16] I don't fuck
[01:04:17] with death
[01:04:18] or my way
[01:04:19] of dealing with death
[01:04:20] I shut out
[01:04:21] and I don't know
[01:04:22] how to be warm
[01:04:23] towards you
[01:04:24] while I'm grieving
[01:04:25] while you're grieving
[01:04:26] so you took the
[01:04:28] you lost somebody
[01:04:29] you know we bros
[01:04:30] but I just suck
[01:04:32] at this shit
[01:04:33] like
[01:04:34] I don't know
[01:04:35] what to do
[01:04:36] I don't know
[01:04:36] what to say
[01:04:36] or when I took my
[01:04:37] I didn't even
[01:04:38] mourn my person
[01:04:39] I've just been numb
[01:04:40] to this shit
[01:04:40] and now I'm
[01:04:41] I'm just not there
[01:04:43] for you right
[01:04:43] I'm no good to you
[01:04:46] there's a
[01:04:46] yo bro
[01:04:47] in that way
[01:04:47] there's a realization
[01:04:48] when I think
[01:04:49] we also know
[01:04:50] when we're not good
[01:04:51] to a person
[01:04:52] like
[01:04:53] I'm not giving you
[01:04:54] the best version
[01:04:54] of myself
[01:04:55] I know I've been
[01:04:56] in relationships
[01:04:57] where I wasn't
[01:04:58] the best version
[01:04:58] of myself
[01:04:59] now I've never been
[01:05:00] unimp
[01:05:01] by the grace of God
[01:05:02] nigga always had
[01:05:03] a bag on him
[01:05:03] shit man
[01:05:04] yeah but I wasn't
[01:05:05] always happy at my job
[01:05:06] so I would bring
[01:05:07] work home
[01:05:08] and it would be
[01:05:09] a miserable thing
[01:05:10] you know or
[01:05:11] the money
[01:05:12] ain't where it's
[01:05:12] supposed to be
[01:05:13] or there's a level
[01:05:14] of lifestyle
[01:05:15] I want to live
[01:05:16] and technically
[01:05:17] this relationship
[01:05:18] is chipping at that
[01:05:19] because dating
[01:05:21] is expensive
[01:05:21] and if I was single
[01:05:23] I would be able
[01:05:24] to save more
[01:05:24] of my money
[01:05:25] but I can't
[01:05:26] just dump you
[01:05:27] because of that
[01:05:28] you know what I'm saying
[01:05:29] so you gotta
[01:05:30] navigate through
[01:05:31] all of that shit too
[01:05:32] so yes
[01:05:33] I can
[01:05:35] is it nice
[01:05:36] is it gonna hurt
[01:05:37] yes
[01:05:38] but you can literally
[01:05:40] yo I don't deal
[01:05:41] with death
[01:05:42] I'm sorry for your loss
[01:05:43] but I gotta go
[01:05:45] I can't lie
[01:05:46] to my partner
[01:05:47] my lady
[01:05:48] I'm doing to my lady
[01:05:49] I'm out of here
[01:05:49] that's a little crazy
[01:05:50] I think that's wild
[01:05:51] I hear you
[01:05:52] it is
[01:05:52] I would say yo
[01:05:53] I'm not good at this
[01:05:54] but I'm gonna try my best
[01:05:56] see like that's something
[01:05:56] I would work through
[01:05:57] I would work through
[01:05:57] someone with their greed
[01:05:58] I'm gonna try my best
[01:05:59] I might not
[01:06:00] I'm not the best in the world
[01:06:01] but
[01:06:02] I've never done it
[01:06:03] let me just put that on record
[01:06:04] I've never done it
[01:06:05] but
[01:06:08] I understand
[01:06:09] yo
[01:06:10] I say this all the time
[01:06:11] people do what's best for them
[01:06:13] and you gotta hope
[01:06:13] that you fall under
[01:06:14] that best God
[01:06:15] crazy
[01:06:17] so I lost my dad
[01:06:19] yo
[01:06:19] that this
[01:06:20] I ain't trying to exploit
[01:06:22] your pain
[01:06:22] but
[01:06:22] we gonna need that
[01:06:23] we gonna need that
[01:06:25] vocally
[01:06:27] so what LA's saying
[01:06:28] is not necessarily
[01:06:29] wrong or anything
[01:06:30] as someone who's lost
[01:06:31] their dad
[01:06:32] while I was in a relationship
[01:06:34] the person did
[01:06:35] think that I was being mean
[01:06:37] and things like that
[01:06:38] but I think it's just grief
[01:06:40] you go through things differently
[01:06:41] and you just
[01:06:42] it's just grief
[01:06:43] and you losing a father
[01:06:44] is
[01:06:44] that's also
[01:06:46] has been in your life
[01:06:47] that's
[01:06:47] it's a little crazy
[01:06:48] so
[01:06:49] if a person doesn't know
[01:06:51] how to deal with a loss
[01:06:52] or a loss
[01:06:53] as big as that
[01:06:54] I would have preferred
[01:06:55] them to leave
[01:06:56] as opposed to
[01:06:57] being a part of
[01:06:58] thinking of saying
[01:06:58] that I'm
[01:06:59] cause sometimes
[01:07:00] you can make things worse
[01:07:01] thinking you helping
[01:07:02] bro
[01:07:02] yeah cause if I'm
[01:07:03] if I'm just going through grief
[01:07:04] and I'm dealing with grief
[01:07:05] and then on top of that
[01:07:06] I'm being told that
[01:07:07] I'm being mean
[01:07:08] and I'm doing this
[01:07:09] and I'm doing that
[01:07:09] it's like
[01:07:11] what the fuck
[01:07:12] yeah like
[01:07:13] like you don't even realize it
[01:07:14] I don't know how to be loving right now
[01:07:15] yeah like
[01:07:16] so whatever you
[01:07:17] my thing is like
[01:07:18] yo bro
[01:07:18] I ain't gonna lie
[01:07:19] I ain't gonna lie
[01:07:19] I feel like we've been
[01:07:20] we've been through enough
[01:07:21] so it's like yo bro
[01:07:22] let me know what you need
[01:07:23] yeah
[01:07:24] you don't need nothing
[01:07:24] if you didn't sit here
[01:07:25] by the grace of God
[01:07:27] we know that
[01:07:28] yeah
[01:07:28] now imagine when we didn't know that
[01:07:30] and we had to go through that
[01:07:31] oh you alright
[01:07:32] get the fuck off me
[01:07:33] I know that
[01:07:34] I know when somebody is
[01:07:36] grieving
[01:07:36] that's probably the
[01:07:38] one of the most annoying questions
[01:07:39] you can ask
[01:07:40] you okay nigga
[01:07:40] no I'm not okay
[01:07:41] did you eat
[01:07:42] that's what you need to ask
[01:07:44] or that's when you need to change
[01:07:46] your
[01:07:47] love languages
[01:07:48] to ask a service
[01:07:49] just start doing shit
[01:07:50] to
[01:07:50] yo
[01:07:51] you
[01:07:51] wash they dishes
[01:07:53] even if it's they roommate
[01:07:55] wash the roommate dishes
[01:07:57] as a callback
[01:08:00] on the old episode
[01:08:01] I actually listened to that
[01:08:03] I know what you're talking about
[01:08:05] aww
[01:08:05] yeah she stayed guys
[01:08:07] I did
[01:08:08] that's when Sody was throwing beef
[01:08:10] and she was scared of her roommate
[01:08:12] this is getting out of here
[01:08:14] but um
[01:08:15] yeah you just do
[01:08:16] ask a service
[01:08:17] try to alleviate their stress
[01:08:18] you know make sure like
[01:08:21] just help them
[01:08:22] you know what I'm saying
[01:08:22] but if you don't know
[01:08:24] you don't know
[01:08:25] and sometimes people don't know
[01:08:26] so I appreciate that perspective
[01:08:27] yeah I just said
[01:08:28] cause honestly
[01:08:29] hearing it out loud
[01:08:30] I'm like
[01:08:31] how can you leave your partner
[01:08:32] yeah cause we thinking about
[01:08:33] the harshness of leaving
[01:08:34] but there is a genuineness
[01:08:36] of saying yo
[01:08:39] I'm not the person
[01:08:40] that you want me to be
[01:08:41] I'm going to fail you
[01:08:42] I'm failing you
[01:08:43] damn so that means
[01:08:44] the person who is leaving
[01:08:45] knows this beforehand
[01:08:47] and death is inevitable
[01:08:48] right
[01:08:48] it's going to happen
[01:08:49] yeah but people can grow though
[01:08:51] cause
[01:08:52] okay
[01:08:52] that's the volunteering
[01:08:54] how you grow without experiencing
[01:08:56] well
[01:08:57] they would have to experience it
[01:08:59] yeah I'm saying
[01:08:59] wait
[01:08:59] the person who has
[01:09:00] the growth
[01:09:01] growing to do
[01:09:02] has to experience death
[01:09:03] but what if you're saying
[01:09:04] actually
[01:09:04] I just don't handle death well
[01:09:05] I've dealt with death before
[01:09:07] and I probably don't handle death well
[01:09:08] how do I
[01:09:09] get better at that
[01:09:11] there's varying degrees though
[01:09:12] that
[01:09:13] that and
[01:09:14] I think you've been
[01:09:15] on both sides
[01:09:16] you've experienced it
[01:09:17] and you've had to
[01:09:18] help somebody
[01:09:20] experience it
[01:09:20] or realize
[01:09:22] what you should do
[01:09:23] in that experiencing stage
[01:09:24] you can't do it every time
[01:09:25] you can't run away every time
[01:09:26] yeah exactly
[01:09:27] it's not running away
[01:09:28] I just feel like
[01:09:29] it's not volunteering
[01:09:30] if you decide to stick with
[01:09:31] someone through their grief
[01:09:32] yeah that
[01:09:32] I would just say
[01:09:33] that's part of like
[01:09:34] that's more so
[01:09:35] just like the part of
[01:09:36] a relationship
[01:09:37] like those are the trials
[01:09:38] and natural things that happen
[01:09:39] you're not volunteering
[01:09:40] cause grief
[01:09:40] death is inevitable
[01:09:41] I agree with you
[01:09:42] I wouldn't call it volunteering
[01:09:44] now volunteering would be like
[01:09:46] if you lost your job
[01:09:47] you was unemployed
[01:09:47] for a year and a half
[01:09:48] you're not applying
[01:09:48] you're being me
[01:09:49] now I'm volunteering
[01:09:51] cause every time
[01:09:52] I get a promotion
[01:09:53] you got an attitude with me
[01:09:54] alright
[01:09:54] now I'm volunteering
[01:09:56] that's when I gotta start
[01:09:57] eating
[01:09:58] but
[01:09:58] alright
[01:09:58] that was a great episode
[01:10:00] that's how we had
[01:10:01] there
[01:10:01] thank you so much
[01:10:02] to the listener questions
[01:10:03] um
[01:10:04] I think it said start
[01:10:05] like you late in the game
[01:10:06] yo
[01:10:09] I'm outta here
[01:10:10] man
[01:10:10] that's the first move
[01:10:11] can we work
[01:10:12] exactly
[01:10:12] that's how you
[01:10:13] that's how you
[01:10:14] do we have food
[01:10:14] that's how you flip the switch
[01:10:16] I didn't work out yet
[01:10:17] oh my gosh
[01:10:18] that's how you flip the crazy switch
[01:10:19] the day is almost over
[01:10:19] how did you not work out
[01:10:20] I didn't work out
[01:10:21] no
[01:10:21] give me a few minutes
[01:10:22] we wanna
[01:10:23] yo
[01:10:52] yo
[01:10:54] that's where the world
[01:10:54] that's where the world starts
[01:10:55] absolutely
[01:10:56] I had to crack a dog
[01:11:00] yo Don Peasley
[01:11:01] Donna Cam
[01:11:02] if I don't know
[01:11:03] Donna Cam
[01:11:03] I got Don Peasley
[01:11:04] just
[01:11:04] that nigga don't
[01:11:05] I don't use that
[01:11:05] Instagram anymore
[01:11:06] oh shit
[01:11:07] yo
[01:11:08] thank y'all for rocking with us
[01:11:09] in 2024
[01:11:10] that's what I was gonna say
[01:11:11] it's been a great year
[01:11:13] um
[01:11:13] a lot of laughs
[01:11:14] before we leave
[01:11:15] is there anything
[01:11:16] you're no longer
[01:11:16] volunteering for
[01:11:17] going into next year
[01:11:19] um
[01:11:21] blame me for
[01:11:22] I don't
[01:11:22] might allowing people
[01:11:23] to blame me for shit
[01:11:24] that I ain't do
[01:11:26] you got a problem
[01:11:27] hold yourself accountable
[01:11:29] fuck you
[01:11:29] mm-hmm
[01:11:30] nice
[01:11:31] what about you Sean
[01:11:33] I don't know
[01:11:34] I didn't really volunteer
[01:11:35] for anything in 2023
[01:11:36] oh you can look at
[01:11:37] it's 2024
[01:11:37] example of
[01:11:38] perfection
[01:11:40] I'm a year behind
[01:11:41] uh
[01:11:42] matter of fact
[01:11:42] I'm not gonna let people
[01:11:43] project certain like
[01:11:45] personality arcs on me
[01:11:46] people like to tell me
[01:11:48] who you are
[01:11:48] yeah no
[01:11:49] you're a real serious person though
[01:11:52] I'm Misfranchable
[01:11:53] you can follow me
[01:11:54] at Misfranchable
[01:11:55] no I'm joking
[01:11:56] were you Misfranchable
[01:11:57] for Halloween
[01:11:57] no
[01:11:58] I was the girl from Killville
[01:11:59] that was somebody who asked that
[01:12:01] because they've never seen
[01:12:01] Killville
[01:12:02] okay yeah okay
[01:12:02] I remember
[01:12:03] what about you Joe
[01:12:05] something you no longer
[01:12:06] volunteering to
[01:12:07] I am not volunteering
[01:12:09] to
[01:12:09] listen to negativity
[01:12:11] all day
[01:12:11] no I just not
[01:12:13] uh
[01:12:13] I'm not volunteering
[01:12:15] to
[01:12:15] not standing
[01:12:17] firm on
[01:12:18] on my beliefs
[01:12:18] to protect
[01:12:19] other people's feelings
[01:12:21] come on bro
[01:12:22] I'm proud of that
[01:12:23] I'm good on that
[01:12:24] I'm proud of that
[01:12:25] I think I've done a lot of
[01:12:27] coddling
[01:12:27] and a lot of like
[01:12:28] just you know
[01:12:29] I hope as
[01:12:30] as as
[01:12:31] arrogant
[01:12:31] as people joke
[01:12:32] about
[01:12:33] I hope you never
[01:12:34] dim your light again
[01:12:35] that really broke my heart
[01:12:37] this year
[01:12:37] I won't
[01:12:38] so never volunteer
[01:12:39] to do that
[01:12:40] for anybody
[01:12:40] except mom and dad
[01:12:42] they get
[01:12:43] they get whatever
[01:12:44] they gotta watch me show
[01:12:45] you see my crib
[01:12:46] my pictures all over that house
[01:12:47] they keep the lights on
[01:12:48] no I do
[01:12:49] I pay that bill
[01:12:50] I pay that bill
[01:12:51] what about you LA
[01:12:53] um
[01:12:56] people's indecisiveness
[01:12:58] yeah
[01:12:58] that's a big one
[01:12:59] this year
[01:12:59] yeah
[01:13:00] what about you
[01:13:01] quads during the day
[01:13:03] kill your dick
[01:13:09] I would just say
[01:13:10] not letting people
[01:13:11] get me mad anymore
[01:13:12] um
[01:13:13] you get mad
[01:13:17] yeah like
[01:13:19] I mean like work
[01:13:21] like work related
[01:13:22] like
[01:13:22] like I'm not gonna do
[01:13:24] more than you wanna do
[01:13:25] like it's just a
[01:13:27] we're both working
[01:13:28] we're both trying to
[01:13:29] make our money
[01:13:29] we're both trying to
[01:13:30] make a living for
[01:13:31] ourselves and our
[01:13:31] future families or
[01:13:32] whatever
[01:13:32] I'm not gonna care
[01:13:33] more than you do
[01:13:35] you know
[01:13:35] so
[01:13:36] I've done a lot of
[01:13:37] that this year
[01:13:37] where I
[01:13:38] overextended myself
[01:13:39] as far as business
[01:13:40] goes
[01:13:40] to make things
[01:13:42] happen
[01:13:43] in the grand scheme
[01:13:44] of things
[01:13:44] for the business
[01:13:45] sake yes
[01:13:46] I should have done
[01:13:47] that stuff
[01:13:47] but realistically
[01:13:48] everybody has to
[01:13:49] pull their own weight
[01:13:50] so that's what
[01:13:51] I need to lean into
[01:13:52] more
[01:13:52] like I said
[01:13:53] new year
[01:13:53] next year
[01:13:53] come on dang
[01:13:54] you can't
[01:13:55] you can't
[01:13:55] end the year
[01:13:56] another one
[01:13:58] um
[01:13:59] one side of
[01:14:00] relationships
[01:14:01] constantly
[01:14:02] I gotta stop
[01:14:02] doing that shit
[01:14:03] cause it's
[01:14:05] it's like
[01:14:05] exhausting
[01:14:06] into the mic
[01:14:07] into the mic
[01:14:08] into the mic
[01:14:09] my nigga
[01:14:10] I can't
[01:14:10] do that shit
[01:14:11] yeah
[01:14:12] one side of
[01:14:13] relationships
[01:14:13] it's like
[01:14:13] exhausting
[01:14:14] I got like
[01:14:14] better shit
[01:14:15] I should be
[01:14:15] doing
[01:14:15] it's just
[01:14:17] you know
[01:14:17] people are
[01:14:18] who they are
[01:14:18] but you know
[01:14:19] happy new year
[01:14:22] okay so
[01:14:22] one more thing
[01:14:23] I wanted to say
[01:14:23] what voice was
[01:14:25] crackling and shit
[01:14:27] one more is
[01:14:28] volunteering my work
[01:14:29] when I know
[01:14:29] I'm burnt out
[01:14:29] I'm not doing
[01:14:30] that anymore
[01:14:32] when I'm burnt
[01:14:33] out I'm just
[01:14:33] turning my phone
[01:14:33] off
[01:14:35] alright
[01:14:36] well
[01:14:37] you know
[01:14:39] we hope
[01:14:39] that everybody
[01:14:40] goes into
[01:14:40] this new year
[01:14:41] this was a
[01:14:42] challenging year
[01:14:43] I think for
[01:14:43] everybody
[01:14:43] in their own
[01:14:44] way
[01:14:46] the way I
[01:14:47] started the year
[01:14:48] pretty rocky
[01:14:49] can't lie
[01:14:50] but now
[01:14:52] I think this year
[01:14:54] it amped my
[01:14:56] faith
[01:14:56] a lot
[01:14:57] like for real
[01:14:58] for real
[01:14:59] cause
[01:15:00] I ain't think
[01:15:01] there were some
[01:15:01] days
[01:15:02] through the month
[01:15:03] of like
[01:15:04] February
[01:15:05] to
[01:15:07] February
[01:15:08] to June
[01:15:09] tough
[01:15:10] yo bro
[01:15:11] sinking
[01:15:12] tough
[01:15:13] yo
[01:15:14] that's why
[01:15:15] I'm very proud
[01:15:15] of all of us
[01:15:16] so
[01:15:17] it's been on
[01:15:17] them
[01:15:17] but I think
[01:15:19] I think
[01:15:20] that's what
[01:15:20] helped
[01:15:21] my faith
[01:15:21] you know
[01:15:22] cause
[01:15:23] they were
[01:15:24] you tell me
[01:15:25] I be here
[01:15:25] December
[01:15:27] in this situation
[01:15:29] back in
[01:15:29] February
[01:15:32] would have giggled
[01:15:33] at you
[01:15:34] probably would have
[01:15:34] got angry
[01:15:35] like yo
[01:15:35] you know
[01:15:36] you bullshit
[01:15:37] I can't lie
[01:15:38] I appreciate
[01:15:38] all y'all in this
[01:15:39] room for this year
[01:15:40] y'all all helped
[01:15:40] me in a certain
[01:15:41] way this year
[01:15:42] I appreciate
[01:15:42] y'all man
[01:15:43] I love y'all
[01:15:43] friendship is the best ship
[01:15:44] love you Don
[01:15:45] I appreciate it
[01:15:46] I don't like that
[01:15:47] you said friendship is the best ship
[01:15:49] I think that
[01:15:50] there's a
[01:15:50] boat in Monte Carlo
[01:15:52] I think that's a better ship
[01:15:53] than any friendship
[01:15:54] y'all niggas got to
[01:15:55] all
[01:15:55] that shit fine
[01:15:56] yo
[01:15:57] yo
[01:15:58] yo
[01:15:59] what we doing
[01:16:00] the trip
[01:16:00] yo bro
[01:16:00] come on
[01:16:03] I've been trying
[01:16:04] to plan
[01:16:05] a group trip
[01:16:06] I replied
[01:16:07] for the
[01:16:09] Kwani replied
[01:16:10] I ain't see
[01:16:10] I ain't see
[01:16:11] Kwansa
[01:16:11] you said
[01:16:11] I thought you said
[01:16:12] it's not gonna happen
[01:16:14] I'm about to say
[01:16:15] I go without you
[01:16:16] listen
[01:16:16] I want to see the world
[01:16:17] so
[01:16:18] so
[01:16:18] I have
[01:16:20] Shaqa come
[01:16:21] I would like Shaqa
[01:16:22] I wasn't gonna invite myself
[01:16:23] I was gonna do my business
[01:16:24] but now that you ask
[01:16:25] we uh
[01:16:27] my job gave me
[01:16:28] eight free tickets
[01:16:29] to anywhere in the world
[01:16:31] where we going
[01:16:32] and I was telling them
[01:16:34] yo
[01:16:34] let's go far
[01:16:35] because it allows us
[01:16:37] three stops
[01:16:37] on the going
[01:16:38] and three stops
[01:16:39] on the back end
[01:16:40] so
[01:16:40] so we
[01:16:41] say if it was like
[01:16:43] Tokyo
[01:16:44] it would allow us
[01:16:45] to go JFK
[01:16:46] to Detroit
[01:16:47] Detroit
[01:16:47] Tokyo
[01:16:48] Tokyo
[01:16:49] to wherever
[01:16:50] so I'm like
[01:16:51] yo let's take advantage
[01:16:52] of it
[01:16:52] let's do a group trip
[01:16:53] we had a long year
[01:16:54] let's not waste it
[01:16:55] on Jamaica
[01:16:57] I've never been to Jamaica
[01:16:58] but that wasn't gonna be
[01:16:59] my time
[01:16:59] I love Jamaica
[01:17:00] nigga
[01:17:00] huh
[01:17:01] cause Jamaica
[01:17:01] not
[01:17:02] Jamaica
[01:17:02] not
[01:17:02] no
[01:17:04] bro we're still here
[01:17:06] we don't need our pod
[01:17:07] yeah
[01:17:07] bro we don't need our pod
[01:17:09] I joined the pod
[01:17:10] at the right time
[01:17:12] I love these benefits
[01:17:13] if she coming
[01:17:14] looks like her playing
[01:17:15] everything
[01:17:15] see no
[01:17:16] and that's
[01:17:17] that's
[01:17:18] weaponizing confidence
[01:17:19] on behalf of men
[01:17:21] damn
[01:17:23] that's really a thing
[01:17:24] for real
[01:17:25] I used to do that
[01:17:27] I stopped
[01:17:27] I stopped
[01:17:28] I've heard mine
[01:17:29] you know
[01:17:29] so yeah
[01:17:30] let's have a group trip
[01:17:31] this year
[01:17:32] let's plan it around
[01:17:33] at least somebody's birthday
[01:17:35] make it make sense
[01:17:37] wait
[01:17:37] end of this month
[01:17:38] no you don't
[01:17:41] oh okay
[01:17:42] I thought you said
[01:17:42] this
[01:17:43] where it makes sense
[01:17:45] you know
[01:17:46] everybody figure out
[01:17:47] their vacation time
[01:17:47] we all in the middle
[01:17:48] us at least
[01:17:49] yeah
[01:17:50] let's stack up our bread
[01:17:52] I'm going to Bali
[01:17:53] after that
[01:17:53] fuck it
[01:17:53] I had a wedding in May
[01:17:55] but
[01:17:55] we'll figure it out
[01:17:56] but I do
[01:17:57] I do wanna
[01:17:59] that's something
[01:17:59] I wanna do more
[01:18:01] next year
[01:18:01] I wanna live a little bit more
[01:18:02] like just not traveling
[01:18:04] for work
[01:18:04] traveling
[01:18:05] nah not even
[01:18:05] I think this whole year
[01:18:06] was just strictly survival
[01:18:08] so now that I survived
[01:18:09] I don't need to keep
[01:18:10] I don't need to maintain
[01:18:11] that mentality
[01:18:12] you know
[01:18:13] time thrived
[01:18:14] exactly
[01:18:15] so you know
[01:18:16] we hope everybody thrives
[01:18:18] next year
[01:18:18] and the first Monday
[01:18:20] of next year
[01:18:20] will be episode 300
[01:18:22] uh
[01:18:23] I've killed the suspense
[01:18:25] now
[01:18:25] I've decided that
[01:18:26] I'm gonna continue
[01:18:27] especially uh
[01:18:31] we got em
[01:18:32] ladies and gentlemen
[01:18:33] fucking got em
[01:18:34] we got em
[01:18:34] with enough convincing
[01:18:36] from um
[01:18:38] everybody in this room
[01:18:39] and
[01:18:40] a particular person
[01:18:41] outside of this room
[01:18:42] I decided to
[01:18:43] you know
[01:18:43] keep it going
[01:18:44] Kojo stop
[01:18:48] Kojo stop
[01:18:48] I wasn't gonna say anything
[01:18:49] um
[01:18:51] but uh
[01:18:51] yeah
[01:18:52] we'll see what the next
[01:18:53] 100 episodes look like
[01:18:56] nigga gonna say
[01:18:57] other 300
[01:18:58] they gotta catch on
[01:19:00] to these things bro
[01:19:01] yeah
[01:19:01] uh
[01:19:02] another
[01:19:02] it's gonna look different
[01:19:04] it's gonna feel different
[01:19:05] we got uh
[01:19:07] a great woman here
[01:19:08] to help us
[01:19:09] navigate
[01:19:09] I thought you about
[01:19:10] to look like
[01:19:11] what great woman
[01:19:11] I swear
[01:19:13] I thought you gonna look at him
[01:19:14] he about to play with me
[01:19:16] to help us uh
[01:19:17] navigate this
[01:19:18] um
[01:19:19] we're gonna all come together
[01:19:21] as a collective
[01:19:21] to up it
[01:19:23] and I appreciate
[01:19:23] everybody here
[01:19:24] and uh
[01:19:26] happy new year
[01:19:27] happy new year
[01:19:28] guys
[01:19:28] what's a good guy
[01:19:29] and once
[01:19:30] one last time
[01:19:31] uh
[01:19:32] 2024
[01:19:34] God is the greatest